X is for infamous.


This website is under construction.

xopl (#001)

coleco.png Name: Xopl
Email: me@XOPL.com
Locale: Minneapolis, MN

Profile: I'm cap'n of this here ship. Arrrrrrrr.

Favourite colour: xarblox

Comments History

Jan 31, 2009 @ 18:08:18

Re: i want my 8 years back

I will just make the next 8 count double.

Dec 4, 2008 @ 09:30:01

Re: 'green' slant-rhymes with 'dream' anyway

(alien tertiary)

Nov 25, 2008 @ 23:18:29

Re: constant confirmation

Interestingly, they've suspended development. I guess announcing an idea and actually finishing it are two very different things.

Sep 13, 2008 @ 03:47:16

Re: ohio voting fraud

Another link of record for the negative 25 million votes for Kerry:


Sep 7, 2008 @ 11:36:59

Re: first amendment implications

I would like to point out that I posted the comments above as a comment on the Huffington Post article, and they still have not approved it.

Aug 1, 2008 @ 19:29:32

Re: stfu n00b

I suppose it would have been shorter and made the same point to simply ask if any of those pro table layouts people could actually name a single benefit.

Jun 3, 2008 @ 10:39:49

Re: moustache moustache ride

I didn't have any free time.

Apr 15, 2008 @ 09:08:02

Re: testicular tanooki suit

Wow I dunno "omghi2u" ... maybe I draw some distinction between magical furry animals and human beings?

And if some men in a documentary managed to fashion their testicles into some sort of giant sailboat, you are goddamn right it would be a must-see for all.

That shit would be impressive!

Apr 13, 2008 @ 14:43:25

Re: testicular tanooki suit

The reason this is all so fantastic and hilarious is precisely because Americans are so uptight about sexuality.

And having grown up in the US, there is something truly magical about watching somebody get beat down by giant testicles.

I'm sorry that some of you who have vastly superior cultural understanding and comfort with your sexuality don't apparently also have a very well developed sense of humor.

Mar 12, 2008 @ 23:19:43

Re: p0wn3z0r3d!

The American Civil Liberties Union responded today to a stunning new report that the NSA has effectively revived the Orwellian "Total Information Awareness" domestic-spying program that was banned by Congress in 2003.


Mar 1, 2008 @ 18:31:30

Re: testicular tanooki suit


Feb 20, 2008 @ 17:14:11

Re: connect the dots



Feb 16, 2008 @ 09:12:33

Re: thought stream

"They create heroic identities with names like Black Arrow, Green Scorpion, and Mr. Silent, and wear bright Superman spandex or black ninja suits."

Much like early Batman or Spiderman, I bet they are also viewed as enemy by the police. Hope they can afford bullet proof vests. Cops don't view people running around in ninja suits nicely these days.

Jan 22, 2008 @ 23:02:09

Re: republican recession

not old enough

Jan 17, 2008 @ 13:17:05

Re: my head asplode

How hard is it for congress to hold hearings where they start with Kiriakou asking the question "who okayed torture" and work their way up?

Well... except for that whole little problem where THEY okayed it themselves.

Dec 19, 2007 @ 18:35:03

Re: can't catch you if you're on fire

"Preliminary indications are that the fire may have started in a room housing electrical or telephone equipment, adjacent to Vice President Dick Cheney’s ... office suite"


Ohhhhh. Telephone equipment. Now I get it.

When you're pumping all of the phone calls of every American into Cheney's office so he can listen to them, you should use proper wiring.

Dec 19, 2007 @ 13:51:32

Re: can't catch you if you're on fire

Man... Cheney is trying REALLY hard to get the torture cover-up out of the news today:


Nov 12, 2007 @ 14:56:15

Re: kill all humans

With 110 robots showing up, it was an even bigger success than I predicted!

Oct 16, 2007 @ 19:41:27

Re: lamenting my latent lesbianism


also... I like that my pasSWORD icon is still Zorked out.

Sep 17, 2007 @ 20:13:33

Re: testicular tanooki suit


Sep 17, 2007 @ 20:12:28

Re: testicular tanooki suit

You mean Tanuki? Like in Mario 3? The Tanuki suit let mario fly and turn to stone.... no giant magical testicles, though.

Man, that would have been a different game...

Aug 18, 2007 @ 17:24:35

Re: symphony of 8 bits (updated)

It should be noted that I've come to realise that Nobuo Uematsu borrowed heavily from "Flight of the Bumblebee" in his "Dungeon" music for FF1, and he borrowed heavily from the first movement of Op. 75 by Antonín Dvo?ák for his "Castle Cornelia" music.

Aug 14, 2007 @ 11:41:48

Re: "news" ... in quotes

you bought from an undercover?

or you bought ditch weed from a hobo?

Aug 13, 2007 @ 15:19:28

Re: "news" ... in quotes

Well, they don't trip the metal detector, the xray machine, or the bomb chemical tests... but just one dog sniff, one unlucky day, and you'll wish you listened to your friends.

Aug 12, 2007 @ 14:34:42

Re: go team!!

ennui bot?

Aug 8, 2007 @ 16:24:23

Re: this is such bull-klobuchar!

It would be totally elevens if everybody starting saying "taking a Klobuchar."

Aug 3, 2007 @ 16:22:17

Re: back, and to the left

Yeah... it's not like there was a frickin Discovery Channel special about how if a hurricane over category 3 hit New Orleans the levies and the pumps would fail.

Just like then, they knew what could happen, and they weren't willing to pay to fix it. Tax cuts for people who make hundreds of thousands of dollars a year are more important.

Aug 1, 2007 @ 20:32:30

Re: you know what they say about...

I'm ok.

Jul 31, 2007 @ 16:24:56

Re: ur soul it has flavr

More LOLcats of death:


Jul 28, 2007 @ 13:42:46

Re: "news" ... in quotes


Jul 28, 2007 @ 12:02:32

Re: "news" ... in quotes

Well well well... CNN is reporting that the TSA announcement was bogus. Yes, that's right.


Only, they are reporting it at 6:30 am in the fucking morning on a Saturday and didn't post anything about this on their website.

Manipulate Americans with fear, and then to cover your ass, issue a correction... only do it at a time and in such a way that most average Americans only hear the fear story not the correction.

Added bonus: see the little old white lady "terrorist" interviewed about the experience.

Jul 27, 2007 @ 09:06:34

Re: ur soul it has flavr


Jul 26, 2007 @ 10:56:51

Re: "news" ... in quotes

I'd love to see the TSA ban cheese like they banned water... don't piss off dairy farmers, man.

Jul 25, 2007 @ 09:33:42

Re: "news" ... in quotes

No shit... why isn't THAT the top story.

Jul 25, 2007 @ 08:37:35

Re: "news" ... in quotes

It is critical that I point out this news story's source is CNN... not AP.

Jul 24, 2007 @ 22:57:04

Re: norm coleman sucks

Even a $10 donation to somebody running against Norm can go a long way. Thanks for your comments hihi.

Jul 20, 2007 @ 20:17:44

Re: norm coleman sucks

"They included an unsuccessful bid by Republican Sen. Norm Coleman of Minnesota, to bar the Federal Communications Commission from reinstating the so-called Fairness Doctrine that would require broadcasters to balance conservative and liberal content."


Jul 16, 2007 @ 17:32:54

Re: oh no, there goes tokyo

And if not, he should.

Jul 16, 2007 @ 12:36:13

Re: oh no, there goes tokyo

Well, wasn't the plot for the original Godzilla movies that Godzilla was America's fault because the fallout from our nukes made him?

If it turns out that a Japanese nuclear mistake makes Godzilla in real life, I would call that ironic.

Jul 16, 2007 @ 11:53:19

Re: oh no, there goes tokyo


Jul 16, 2007 @ 09:00:44

Re: more than meets expectations


Jul 10, 2007 @ 10:24:04

Re: with your bones, dear henry

Jesse is the best person ever! I like Jesse the most! Hooray! Also Paul.

Jul 10, 2007 @ 10:23:30

Re: with your bones, dear henry

I'm buying Jesse a pizza today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jul 10, 2007 @ 10:22:55

Re: testicular tanooki suit




BALLS>S>JDGLHG hqopypt4pqhnrgwalejkgafbadf'dfhklanfdh

Jul 10, 2007 @ 10:08:25

Re: testicular tanooki suit

Jesse just pointed out to me that the U of M front page has a story on this film right now. Apparently they're showing it:



Jul 9, 2007 @ 20:32:59

Re: with your bones, dear henry


Jun 24, 2007 @ 15:03:11

Re: right message...

Hi. I just clicked both links 10 times each. Send me a check for $2000 immediately or I will hire a collection agency.

Jun 16, 2007 @ 00:38:16

Re: go team!!

What in the fuck.

Jun 15, 2007 @ 18:03:04

Re: apparently not like a bicyle

That's what I said, booby traps.

Jun 5, 2007 @ 15:52:30

Re: a proscenium apollo g

Best bots EVAR!

Jun 4, 2007 @ 11:26:08

Re: colourful

"#b1000d" -Paul

May 31, 2007 @ 12:58:14

Re: a proscenium apollo g

Are the bots talking to eachother now?

May 29, 2007 @ 21:28:16

Re: with apologies to bill murray

I'm elevens about my nicknames.

May 11, 2007 @ 14:43:39

Re: a proscenium apollo g

I like that I am invited to please delete the messaage if it isn't interesting... but therein lies the problem.

He's a mankey man... how interesting!

May 1, 2007 @ 22:59:04

Re: beetle gin and juice

Their ain't that many mistakes that I make that I can think of. Its rare that I make one. I don't never spel wrong, to.

Apr 29, 2007 @ 22:15:34

Re: beetle gin and juice

You can buy Dani and me drinks when we're in the windy city. We both like free booze.

That's why we're dating eachother... cause we have so much in common!

Apr 29, 2007 @ 19:17:19

Re: news flash

No felines were harmed in the making of this website...

except for the two kittens we put in the blender for that photo.

Apr 27, 2007 @ 10:22:13

Re: beetle gin and juice

Dani and I will probably be in Chicago looking at the fishies at the Shed Aquarium that weekend.

Apr 26, 2007 @ 11:06:21

Re: news flash

You are right...... it is two kittens in a blender.

Apr 17, 2007 @ 20:07:49

Re: untitled

I don't like crystal gripping hippies. Don't worry. :-*

Apr 13, 2007 @ 08:48:19

Re: a proscenium apollo g

ß âàñ ëþáëþ!

Apr 12, 2007 @ 08:31:55

Re: beetlejuice

I said I was a procrastinator, not an English major.... although, I can see where you'd get those two confused. OH SNAP!

Apr 11, 2007 @ 15:34:09

Re: beetlejuice

It is also known as Natural Red 4, for those of you who wear lipstick.

Apr 11, 2007 @ 13:04:14

Re: procter & gamble with your life

A neglected blog. What the hell did you think it was?

Apr 4, 2007 @ 12:05:48

Re: caterpillar

reading? that word doesn't quite capture the obsessiveness.

Apr 2, 2007 @ 15:15:23

Re: caterpillar


Mar 30, 2007 @ 06:30:41

Re: You come across website.

This website is NOT! BLACK!

Mar 19, 2007 @ 16:53:27

Re: pints and palindromes

proposition someone for sex*

Thank god she was too drunk to enter the code correctly... or to try turning the knob the other direction.

Mar 9, 2007 @ 12:53:09

Re: dear boston bomb squad...

I've heard the stories... but I didn't start working for the unions until 2002.

Feb 27, 2007 @ 21:24:31

Re: a gambit for my ambit

I forgot to mention the logging truck(!) parking me in at my apartment before I even left this morning.

Feb 27, 2007 @ 09:42:52

Re: a proscenium apollo g

She sure told you!

Feb 14, 2007 @ 13:38:27

Re: whale oil beef hooked

Only 25 more days to redesign my blog!

Feb 13, 2007 @ 09:30:47

Re: a proscenium apollo g

I think I can safely say for all of us...

-1 ? :(

Feb 8, 2007 @ 16:27:32

Re: bad police work

Sounds like *somebody* got caught by my spam filter.

Feb 5, 2007 @ 15:22:30

Re: dear boston bomb squad...

Let us always remember the Boston Terror Attack of 1-31-07!


Feb 2, 2007 @ 09:33:10

Re: dear boston bomb squad...

One Margaret Maloney put it better than me:

"If I see a scary looking tree out my bedroom window, think it’s a monster, and then discover upon closer inspection that it isn’t, it doesn’t mean the tree has perpetrated a hoax against me."


Feb 1, 2007 @ 13:48:37

Re: whale oil beef hooked

Wall-to-wall Union Jack's? Don't tempt me...

Jan 29, 2007 @ 15:26:35

Re: swedish sojourns

Country of origin: Sweden.

That's all I care about.

Jan 28, 2007 @ 21:33:53

Re: swedish sojourns

svenska fisk*

Jan 28, 2007 @ 21:33:20

Re: swedish sojourns

My car tried to eat them!

Jan 25, 2007 @ 16:06:42

Re: procter & gamble with your life

I like how you are recanting on the deliciousness of pizza pringles as if that is what got you banned for life, not the calling me a fucking hick.

Jan 18, 2007 @ 11:47:12

Re: alcoholic analogy

A special icon that nobody else can select, even!

Jan 17, 2007 @ 22:28:14

Re: You come across website.

Thanks a lot guys.

Jan 17, 2007 @ 12:05:23

Re: You come across website.

With friends like you Colin, who needs enemies.

Jan 16, 2007 @ 15:41:23

Re: alcoholic analogy


Jan 15, 2007 @ 21:47:19

Re: blogging is so 2006

You are banned.

Jan 15, 2007 @ 14:15:37

Re: blogging is so 2006

The lasagna was fucking amazing. Sicilian girls rule!

Jan 1, 2007 @ 22:35:31

Re: happy nude year

What? Nothing says Happy Nude Year like seeing your friends naked.

Dec 31, 2006 @ 12:22:45

Re: kill da wabbit

This is one of my old favourite xmas videos:


Donald and his nephews in an epic snowball fight.

Dec 22, 2006 @ 09:23:02

Re: oh shit, he exclaimed

Duely noted.

Dec 20, 2006 @ 09:53:40

Re: speaking of ninjas

haha! I remember those! I didn't realise there was any connection?

Dec 17, 2006 @ 16:13:53

Re: haming it up

Making love, Paul. Making love.

Dec 11, 2006 @ 13:40:46

Re: magical history tour

Not as of yet......

Dec 11, 2006 @ 09:51:31

Re: how much wood would a...

Seriously though... anybody know the answer?

Dec 6, 2006 @ 13:47:58

Re: no good deed goes ununpunished

I didn't buy the replacement.

Nov 30, 2006 @ 13:26:22

Re: totally tumorlur, dude

// Snowmaker Copyright (c) 2003 Peter Gehrig. All rights reserved.

Nov 27, 2006 @ 13:29:52

Re: my dream pet

HOLY SHIT! Toejam and Earl came out on the Wii today! Now I really need one.

Nov 26, 2006 @ 19:36:57

Re: my dream pet

Happy belated birfday, sith!

Nov 26, 2006 @ 17:26:52

Re: my dream pet

I want a wii... maybe.

I was wrong about those centipedes only being in MN.

Nov 20, 2006 @ 18:20:33

Re: no, that's before the burial


Nov 19, 2006 @ 19:35:23

Re: secrets secreted

I think you picked the wrong icon...


Nov 16, 2006 @ 10:40:59

Re: no, that's before the burial

You never buy me nice things anymore.

Nov 14, 2006 @ 17:58:15

Re: bring out your dead

you know... the one you were probably seeing two of... two blurry images of.

Nov 13, 2006 @ 21:44:58

Re: bring out your dead

The amount of drunk I require to sing publically is not conducive to driving. You though, I shoulda just signed you up for it like I said I was gonna.

Actually the real best part was that wasted soldier on leave who announced he was buying the entire bar a round, and went around annoying the people who didn't go up to the bar to collect on it.

Nov 13, 2006 @ 12:50:30

Re: bring out your dead

We have a weiner!

Nov 10, 2006 @ 23:39:55

Re: unbothersome badinage

I'd be more inclined if it wasn't for the certain unalienable death.

Nov 7, 2006 @ 19:49:45

Re: the scariest day of the year

In 2000, Chipotle gave free burritos to people with the sticker. It was glorious.

Nov 6, 2006 @ 09:27:47

Re: the knock at my door

It keeps getting better:


Nov 5, 2006 @ 20:49:28

Re: do you see what I see?

So that's where baby trees come from!

Nov 2, 2006 @ 11:58:36

Re: goodnight

Ok, I'll admit theirs is funnier.


Now with 100% more accurate links.

Nov 2, 2006 @ 10:38:04

Re: the knock at my door

Test run?


Oct 30, 2006 @ 11:27:13

Re: scary boo or bad boo?


Oct 30, 2006 @ 09:35:28

Re: scary boo or bad boo?


Oct 29, 2006 @ 20:01:07

Re: the knock at my door

Bush now has the right to declare martial law.


Oct 24, 2006 @ 19:32:39

Re: scary boo or bad boo?

Jesse shared this with me, so I thought I'd pass it on to you:


Oct 23, 2006 @ 11:51:47

Re: unicorn chaser


Oct 23, 2006 @ 11:42:27

Re: unicorn chaser

I'm reluctant to post to my blog anymore because I never want this kitty picture to go away.

SooooOOOOOooo CuuuUUUUUuuuute!

Oct 20, 2006 @ 13:41:34

Re: unicorn chaser

I'll give you a fired.

Oct 18, 2006 @ 15:27:28

Re: the knock at my door

Insomuchas the people running the country right now are clowns, yes.

Oct 8, 2006 @ 20:37:14

Re: ohio voting fraud

go fuck yourself *yawn*

Oct 5, 2006 @ 15:18:46

Re: =(

No pouring one out for the homies who couldn't make it this year.

Oct 4, 2006 @ 13:50:38

Re: =(

As if that weren't bad enough... my cable modem died and I didn't have internet at home for almost 48 hours.


Sep 29, 2006 @ 15:22:39

Re: can't sleep. clown will eat me.

El Oh El

Sep 24, 2006 @ 12:06:05

Re: i'm a warm bodega

Oh wait... he's saying SPIDER CIDER SPIDER CIDER?!?!

Oh shit.

Sep 22, 2006 @ 01:43:47

Re: unimaginable horror

Definitely not a simple squid. Definitely some sort of eldar god.

Sep 20, 2006 @ 15:08:30

Re: now that i'm in the clear

Thanks corporate intern stooge guy.

Sep 20, 2006 @ 13:23:59

Re: cinnamon and spider bones

Adam Green was looking disturbingly like this:


Sep 19, 2006 @ 11:51:19

Re: surprisingly sober

ooooh of course! MELT BANANA!

Sep 19, 2006 @ 00:31:16

Re: surprisingly sober

I have to say, Death From Above 1979 comes about as close as anything I got right now.

Sep 15, 2006 @ 23:52:57

Re: soylent saturn

Oh Zach, you make the internets so funny. You're so smart and witty. Everybody loves you. You're so dreamy.

Sep 14, 2006 @ 12:09:29

Re: no, that's tora bora

A classy, classy man.

Sep 13, 2006 @ 09:22:33

Re: eaten by a croc would be cooler

Awww so sad... he's dead *AND* a failure.

Sep 5, 2006 @ 13:50:29

Re: arrrrrrrrrrrrr you ready?

Don't any of your friends you want to bring along own cars? MPLS is the shit, yo. We got party up here like WORD. Fucking Prince be up in here.

Weather could be anything from 40 to 80. It's Minnesota.

Costume ideas: Sexy Pirate... Drunken Pirate... Lazy Pirate (eye-patch + sword)

Sep 5, 2006 @ 13:09:17

Re: arrrrrrrrrrrrr you ready?

Pirates also enjoy ales.

Sep 5, 2006 @ 09:10:19

Re: eaten by a croc would be cooler

Oh I think I meant this one:



"'Crocodile Hunter' Steve Irwin was videotaped pulling a poisonous stingray barb from his chest just before he died, according to news reports."

That is so fucking hardcore.

Sep 5, 2006 @ 09:08:45

Re: eaten by a croc would be cooler

BREAKING: Steve Irwin Killed By Gigantic Cat


Sep 4, 2006 @ 21:01:43

Re: eaten by a croc would be cooler

I don't know if this is real or not...


Sep 4, 2006 @ 20:21:51

Re: eaten by a croc would be cooler

I'm not the only heartless bastard on earth:


(Thanks sith for finding that.)

Sep 1, 2006 @ 17:24:53

Re: sarah sandesky

Wow, Alison is going to London, too? What a coincidence!

Sep 1, 2006 @ 13:12:45

Re: sarah sandesky

That's where she lives, so probably yes.

Sep 1, 2006 @ 10:16:43

Re: sarah sandesky

She has these tattoos now... down both forearms are several bars of written music from a Clash song, and then she's got the outline of Minnesota with the Mississippi on her upper arm.

Sep 1, 2006 @ 09:24:41

Re: sarah sandesky

Then I'd be living in dirty hippy town, though.

Aug 31, 2006 @ 08:53:35

Re: it just keeps getting better

I hope that comes out for the Wii, which is obviously going to be so much more awesome than the suxBox 3shitty.

Oh how I want to cut zombies up with chainsaws.

Aug 30, 2006 @ 22:53:17

Re: it just keeps getting better

To not Zombiepubcrawl:

I love you guys. "I would do anything for brains!" Thanks for the personal message, I appreciate it.

You're right about one thing though: Pirates vs. Zombies... Zombies can't turn into pirates, but pirates can sure turn into zombies. It's the law of entropy man... everything ends up zombie in the end.

Aug 30, 2006 @ 22:51:29

Re: it just keeps getting better

To not Pirate9:

I'm pretty sure I did -999, not -500... but how did you know it was me? Seriously? No really, I don't think my IP would be a giveaway?

Also, did it work? Did your code subtract the number? Just wondering.

Aug 29, 2006 @ 14:39:28

Re: it just keeps getting better

You too could be carrying your own internal horrid evil twin. Always plotting against you it is.

Aug 28, 2006 @ 21:30:54

Re: it just keeps getting better

And I thought my ass just hurt from my bike seat...

Aug 27, 2006 @ 12:51:37

Re: vikings' sex cruise

Jesse left me a drunk voice mail that basically amounts to squealing. Pretty amazing.

Aug 24, 2006 @ 15:59:23

Re: untitled

"The day I found out I was an adult Indigo will stay with me forever. I was walking hand in hand with my son down a Los Angeles street when this women approached me and said, 'You're an Indigo and your son is a Crystal.' I immediately replied, 'Yes!' and the woman smiled at me and walked away. I stood there for a moment, because I had no idea what the heck an Indigo and Crystal was, but I seemed so sure of it when I had blurted out 'Yes!'"



Aug 23, 2006 @ 18:27:50

Re: exigent experience excellent

I asked about it originally in this thread because it was our usual toast in London. I can't quite remember if it was Amrish or Cole who taught it to me.

Aug 22, 2006 @ 16:48:45

Re: exigent experience excellent


That's the rescue place's website.

P.S. This comment thread was HILARIOUS!!!!!

Aug 22, 2006 @ 09:16:08

Re: if your friends jumped off a bridge

Appendix I: I don't think my knee appreciated the three impacts into water very much. Well, I mean my knee is either slightly injured and producing some fluid or the impact drove lake water into my knee.

Perhaps the fish tail protruding from the skin would be some indication.

Aug 22, 2006 @ 09:02:39

Re: if your friends jumped off a bridge

To be fair you can only see one. Maybe the other is smooth like a baby's butt?


Aug 21, 2006 @ 23:04:35

Re: one two punch

one three punch...

Jesse: The secret word on Pee-Wee's Playhouse on Adult Swim tonight is "it."

Aug 18, 2006 @ 14:40:37

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

Ruin my fucking life why don't everybody.

Aug 18, 2006 @ 12:52:49

Re: but... how... with the...

Shouldn't the message have been for the hey hey hey hey Mr. Postman then instead of for me?

It's like almost threatening in its tone... like they're going to come kick my ass if they get my mail again.

Aug 18, 2006 @ 11:38:53

Re: i wanna see your fixie

And mountain bikes are for fucking yuppie ass Gen-X'ers. DUDE! THAT'S SO EXTREME!

Yeah, I fucking said it.

Oh, and Schwinns just aren't as cool as my NEW FUCKING BMX BIKE.

Aug 18, 2006 @ 11:37:34

Re: i wanna see your fixie

I'm a fucking hooligan. You can't take a 10 speed frame off any sweet jumps... that shit will be a tangled wreck of fiery metal afterwards.

Aug 18, 2006 @ 01:21:22

Re: pirate ships were early democracies

raaawwwwrt pieces of eight pieces of eight

Aug 18, 2006 @ 01:10:56

Re: pirate ships were early democracies

I require a pirate outfit... an eyepatch, some raggity clothes. A HAT! I MUST HAVE A MAGNIFICENT HAT, FORTHWITH!

Aug 18, 2006 @ 00:33:28

Re: pirate ships were early democracies

At least part of the night simply must be spent at Psycho Suzy's in Nordeast.

Aug 17, 2006 @ 23:43:05

Re: i wanna see your fixie

apropos of everything:


Aug 17, 2006 @ 23:28:05

Re: pirate ships were early democracies

The date is official. More planning needs to be done now.


Aug 17, 2006 @ 23:11:30

Re: i wanna see your fixie

Just as soon as she's tuned up.

Aug 17, 2006 @ 22:46:53

Re: i wanna see your fixie

I named it hippiPodamus.

Aug 17, 2006 @ 22:39:42

Re: i wanna see your fixie

Oh, I got an iPod, too.

Aug 17, 2006 @ 20:50:51

Re: i hope you like murdered

Man. God gives me a bmx bike for $20, and all it needs is a new front tire... whereas the ones I had been looking at were $200-300... and I'm complaining?

I'm sorry God. I don't deserve you.

Aug 17, 2006 @ 20:33:17

Re: i hope you like murdered

I'm not dead, but my bike needs a new front tire.

God hates me.

Aug 17, 2006 @ 15:46:36

Re: i hope you like murdered

I do need new sneakers.

I think I hate ice cream.

Aug 17, 2006 @ 15:16:13

Re: i hope you like murdered

I don't have any of those things.

Aug 17, 2006 @ 14:11:49

Re: you're having contractions

That is indeed what it means... but I could not place the Cr. You, Mal, are a genius.

Aug 17, 2006 @ 13:57:12

Re: you're having contractions

Samsonite! I was way off.

Aug 15, 2006 @ 16:01:51

Re: what a fucking crock (updated)

ding ding ding we have a winner

Aug 15, 2006 @ 10:40:00

Re: we can't stop here it's bat country

I can't blog about anything that happened in Vegas. So, to be sure, a good time was had by all.

Aug 10, 2006 @ 17:46:57

Re: what a fucking crock (updated)

HomelandDefense link VERY VERY NSFW

Aug 10, 2006 @ 16:31:05

Re: what a fucking crock (updated)

See MythBusters last night?

Aug 10, 2006 @ 15:54:13

Re: what a fucking crock (updated)


No bombs.... buuuuuut, you might want to see a doctor.

Aug 10, 2006 @ 15:49:17

Re: what a fucking crock (updated)

There was a story awhile ago about female suicide bombers with bombs up their chachas.

Do you stick a bomb sniffing dog's nose in every girl's crotch? Or maybe you make them all squat and cough.

Aug 10, 2006 @ 15:45:18

Re: we can't stop here it's bat country

I'm staying across the street from the Bellagio.

Aug 10, 2006 @ 15:38:14

Re: what a fucking crock (updated)

Where are you going?

Aug 10, 2006 @ 15:27:23

Re: what a fucking crock (updated)

If the threat of my bottle of water is real, where's the fucking bomb squad to dispose of it. Think of the poor dump truck driver, getting paid less for a much worse job than the TSA guy, who is going to hit the compact button on his truck and get a piece of shrapnel in his ass.

Aug 10, 2006 @ 15:16:51

Re: what a fucking crock (updated)

Actually, my friend thinks this is just a promotional stunt for the World Trade Center movie.

Aug 10, 2006 @ 15:14:27

Re: what a fucking crock (updated)

It's funny to watch unqualified administrative types try to formulate plans. Serious comedy. There should be a degree program for disaster programming. You can't build bridges without an engineering degree. Why should the lives of millions of people be in the hands of people with horse breeding backgrounds.

Aug 10, 2006 @ 12:59:48

Re: what a fucking crock (updated)

I already look and smell like I use none of those things.

Aug 9, 2006 @ 15:53:21

Re: bilbo, the legend continues



Aug 9, 2006 @ 01:00:41

Re: mpls vice

No, this was it?

Aug 8, 2006 @ 14:05:44

Re: mpls vice

yeah I want to see that, but I was holding out for going with Gray.

Aug 8, 2006 @ 12:47:29

Re: fringe fest features fucking

There are snakes on my mother friendly phone!

Aug 8, 2006 @ 12:28:36

Re: i was at the jabberjaw

I was at the cornerstore
knew it had been robbed before
heard a shot out in the street
someone was dead meat
the body was on nicolet
so the cops didn't give a shit
and the shooter got away
in murderapolis

Aug 4, 2006 @ 14:12:43

Re: it would be a 4 hour epic

Really I just want to see an undead alien dragging it's feet on the ground with it's tentacles outstretched moaning "KLAAAKTAAARRRRRSS!!!!" and then have the subtitle on the bottom of the screen say "BRRRAAAIIIINNNNSSSS!!!!"

Aug 4, 2006 @ 14:06:30

Re: it would be a 4 hour epic

Nobody said anything about them being mutants.

Also... technically... Pam is flat out wrong, and Jesse introduces an interesting point:

There are space aliens and then there are Mexican aliens.

Just like (PAM) there are space pirates and sea pirates and music pirates.

So we need really to call them space alien space pirate zombies. I think.

Aug 4, 2006 @ 11:17:17

Re: it would be a 4 hour epic

No... I guess it would have to be either alien space pirate zombies or space pirate zombie aliens...

I'm hurting my head.

Aug 4, 2006 @ 11:16:24

Re: it would be a 4 hour epic

Shouldn't that be space pirate alien zombies?

Hmmmm... ninja skills. Wow... just imagine the advancements in martial arts in an intelligent species that has been around tens of thousands of years longer than us.

Yes. Alien kung fu would surely be substantial.

Jul 31, 2006 @ 15:49:08

Re: pirate ships were early democracies

Jesse and Paul are apparently too huge of jerks to pick a day.

Jul 29, 2006 @ 13:04:29

Re: pillow pants' precious

Jesus Mary and Joseph this is funny:


Jul 28, 2006 @ 19:35:20

Re: attention jon stewart

"Why didn't you vote for Bush?"

I don't trust anything that bleeds for seven days and doesn't die.

Jul 28, 2006 @ 07:53:54

Re: pirate ships were early democracies

Drink Like a Pirate [Every]Day

Jul 27, 2006 @ 14:13:52

Re: pirate ships were early democracies

I need some commitment people. Call your mothers. Call your best friends. MAKE SURE THERE IS NOTHING YOU ARE GOING TO BE GONE FOR ON THE WEEKEND YOU PICK.

Jul 27, 2006 @ 13:58:10

Re: pirate ships were early democracies

Talk Like a Pirate Day is September 19, for the record.

Jul 27, 2006 @ 11:45:28

Re: suicide watch

Would the even longer jail time be worth stealing a car, and raising the Jolly Roger on it's antenna?

Jul 27, 2006 @ 11:42:51

Re: suicide watch

Would the jail time be worth burrying a chest full of Cap'n Morgan's Private Stock in the sand at Calhoun, and then sailing a hastily made raft across the lake from the opposite side to unburry and drink said booze on Drink Like a Pirate Day?

Jul 25, 2006 @ 15:58:56

Re: van goghhhhh my god!!!!!

I'm more of an idea guy really... a dreamer. Don't take the wind out of my sails.

Jul 25, 2006 @ 15:27:42

Re: van goghhhhh my god!!!!!

We need to start a film company. Or film division. Of another company... that we already started... sort of.

Jul 24, 2006 @ 00:45:57

Re: fruity fucking pebbles

feelings are boring
kissing is awesome

Jul 23, 2006 @ 10:04:52

Re: i still got it


Jul 20, 2006 @ 18:18:24

Re: suicide watch

You know that WE'RE throwing Drink Like a Pirate Day, right?!

We need to pick either September 16 or 23...

Jul 19, 2006 @ 19:52:37

Re: dreamytime dinery

The one with legs tasted like calamari!!!!!! I just realised. Not real good, but not terrible.

Jul 19, 2006 @ 19:51:58

Re: dreamytime dinery

Mutton. There's another one. Mutton is gross.

Jul 19, 2006 @ 15:19:45

Re: no no no no no

what a selfish asshat

Jul 19, 2006 @ 10:28:39

Re: boobonic plague

I think I got pneumonia from the prednisone.

Jul 18, 2006 @ 23:51:17

Re: boobonic plague

So, what did the doctor give me for my viral tonsil swelling illness?


Let's review, shall we?

"Prednisone is particularly effective as an immunosuppressant and affects virtually all of the immune system."

"Do not take prednisone if you have a serious bacterial, viral, or fungal infection. Prednisone weakens the body's immune response and thus its ability to fight infection."


Jul 18, 2006 @ 15:19:29

Re: boobonic plague


Jul 18, 2006 @ 14:35:27

Re: boobonic plague

Does Jacquie read xoplcom anymore?

Jul 18, 2006 @ 10:43:50

Re: boobonic plague

"Hey baby, I kind of miss being sick now, why don't you come over and give me the BOOBonic plague."

I'm so very, very tempted at this point. I mean, who cares if I get dumped... who wants to date a girl who doesn't A) find that funny and 2) make with the boobery.

Jul 18, 2006 @ 10:41:39

Re: boobonic plague

I seem to remember you being sick and leaking at both ends and missing work... and then on a separate occasion, not being sick but never-the-less seeing your spirit animal while on the toilet. Am I not remembering this clearly?

Jul 11, 2006 @ 15:48:57

Re: unimaginable horror

Are you sure?


Jul 10, 2006 @ 09:17:20

Re: radio krack

Oh Eddie... you're so crazy.

I have to say this song is leaps and bounds better than "Party All the Time," and let us just never speak of "Whatzupwitu."

Jul 7, 2006 @ 14:11:54

Re: continuous quizes

I was quizzing you on spelling. You passed.

Jul 3, 2006 @ 21:09:41

Re: how about a nice cup of


Jul 3, 2006 @ 20:58:44

Re: loltomic bombs nuclear lollercaust

poor mal

Jun 27, 2006 @ 11:21:49

Re: but you can call me cap'n

More like White Zach Rackham...

ouch, I hurt my feelings.

Jun 26, 2006 @ 16:09:34

Re: frosty freezers

Oh, I saw Trent at the show.

Jun 26, 2006 @ 12:11:49

Re: mill city monster

This is how it begins...


Jun 26, 2006 @ 08:48:26

Re: chaaarrrrrrt!!!


Jun 21, 2006 @ 16:25:25

Re: the bearded curtain

roflberry pwncakes!

Jun 21, 2006 @ 13:46:01

Re: the bearded curtain

He is the walrus! googoo goojoob

Jun 21, 2006 @ 09:02:56

Re: ohio voting fraud

Post sources next time.

Jun 19, 2006 @ 12:17:10

Re: di knows vi

I think I regret this whole post. heh

Jun 16, 2006 @ 12:04:04

Re: colourful


Jun 16, 2006 @ 10:27:00

Re: colourful

blue footed boobies?

Jun 15, 2006 @ 10:17:41

Re: you can't hurry good pizza

I've been peeing in my pants.

Jun 11, 2006 @ 12:22:10

Re: it's pronounced "serge"

Yes. At my building.

Jun 10, 2006 @ 09:31:05

Re: footie!

I can't help but notice I'm not there.

Jun 9, 2006 @ 15:35:48

Re: footie!

paul found this:


Jun 9, 2006 @ 12:57:03

Re: sunshine and puffy clouds


Jun 8, 2006 @ 19:03:59

Re: it's pronounced "serge"

If it makes you feel any better I ran into Serge again.

Jun 7, 2006 @ 16:47:15

Re: di knows vi


Jun 7, 2006 @ 14:22:44

Re: di knows vi

Way to prove their point, Pam.

Jun 7, 2006 @ 12:42:05

Re: di knows vi


Jun 6, 2006 @ 15:43:15

Re: hail satan!

Well, the number of the beast has also apparently been gotten wrong, and it is 616.

Jun 5, 2006 @ 23:43:35

Re: it's pronounced "serge"

From the desk of the department of random coincidence, this just in:

They had a huge map of the world on the wall at the car dealership. I decided to look for Togo. Some strange woman knew right where it was because she used to date a guy from Togo.

Jun 1, 2006 @ 20:03:02

Re: throw your hands up and

I want that!

May 31, 2006 @ 19:52:24

Re: bilbo, the legend continues

beautiful door; he had also, by the way, knocked out the secret mark that he had put there the morning before. Carefully! Carefully! he said. It is not like you, Bilbo, to keep friends waiting on the mat, and then open the door like a pop-gun! Let me introduce Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, and especially Thorin! At your service! said Bifur, Bofur, and Bombur standing in a row. Then they hung up two yellow hoods and a

May 31, 2006 @ 09:27:01

Re: bilbo, the legend continues

find a use for it. Indeed I can! said the wizard. But share and share alike! You may find you have more needs than you expect. So they put the gold in bags and slung them on the ponies, who were not at all pleased about it. After that their going was slower, for most of the time they walked. But the land was green and there was much grass

May 30, 2006 @ 09:34:50

Re: throw your hands up and

I'm pretty sure the 22nd should be just fine.

May 30, 2006 @ 09:17:23

Re: bilbo, the legend continues

"There and Cock Again, A Hard-On's Tale"

May 30, 2006 @ 09:15:59

Re: bilbo, the legend continues

be potent wine to make a wood-elf drowsy; but this wine, it would seem, was the heady vintage of the great gardens of Dorwinion, not meant for his soldiers or his servants, but for the kings feasts only, and for smaller bowls, not for the butlers great flagons. Very soon the chief guard nodded his head, then he laid it on the table and fell fast asleep. The butler went on talking and laughing to

May 30, 2006 @ 09:15:01

Re: throw your hands up and

That's not going to work for me. I'll be in WI with my bruvva.

May 29, 2006 @ 19:12:20

Re: bilbo, the legend continues

nothing left to do but to fill their water-skins at a clear spring they found close to the forest-gate, and unpack the ponies. They distributed the packages as fairly as they could, though Bilbo thought his lot was wearisomely heavy, and did not at all like the idea of trudging for miles and miles with all that on his back. Dont you worry! said Thorin. It will get lighter all too soon.

May 29, 2006 @ 19:03:48

Re: throw your hands up and

When are you coming to Minneapolis so we can have ourselves some real life?

May 29, 2006 @ 13:17:33

Re: throw your hands up and

Better than fucking a bookshelf... did I mention I saw the Squid and the Whale?


May 28, 2006 @ 15:17:39

Re: bilbo, the legend continues

deal more than a nine days wonder. The legal bother, indeed, lasted for years. It was quite a long time before Mr. Baggins was in fact admitted to be alive again. The people who had got specially good bargains at the Sale took a


Very soon the chief guard had no keys, but Bilbo was trotting as fast as he could along the passage towards the cells. The great bunch seemed very heavy to his arms, and his heart was often in his mouth, in spite of his ring, for he could not prevent the keys from making every now and then a loud clink and clank, which put him all in a tremble. First he unlocked Balins door, and locked it again carefully as soon


flames. He shuddered; and very quickly he was plain Mr. Baggins of Bag-End, Under-Hill, again. He got up trembling. He had less than half a mind to fetch the lamp, and more than half a mind to pretend to, and go and hide behind the beer barrels in the cellar, and not come out again until all the dwarves had gone away. Suddenly he found that the music and the singing had stopped, and they were all looking at him with eyes

May 26, 2006 @ 11:38:24

Re: on the count of meow

It occurs to me that given this information it should be exceedingly easy to catch cats.

May 26, 2006 @ 09:18:48

Re: bilbo, the legend continues

stairs, and turned and went down wide echoing ways, and turned again and climbed yet more stairs, and yet more stairs again. These were smooth, cut out of the living rock broad and lair; and up, up, the dwarves went, and they met no sign of any living thing, only furtive shadows that fled from the approach of their torches fluttering in the draughts. The steps were not made, all the same, for hobbit-legs,

May 24, 2006 @ 17:24:25

Re: hobbit spam

and more...

as soon as the door was open, just as if he had been invited. I see they have begun to arrive already, he said when he caught sight of Dwalins green hood hanging up. He hung his red one next to it, and Balin at your service! he said with his hand on his breast. Thank you! said Bilbo with a gasp. It was not the correct thing to say, but they have begun to arrive had flustered him badly. He liked

May 24, 2006 @ 14:45:05

Re: hobbit spam

Hey! They sent me more! Pretty soon I'll have the whole book:

gained-well, you will see whether he gained anything in the end. The mother of our particular hobbit... what is a hobbit? I suppose hobbits need some description nowadays, since they have become rare and shy of the Big People, as they call us. They are (or were) a little people, about half our height, and smaller than the bearded Dwarves. Hobbits have no beards. There is little or no magic about them, except

May 24, 2006 @ 14:30:57

Re: hobbit spam

Well, the spam WAS for penis drugs. But they usually include some text to throw off spam filters.

May 24, 2006 @ 12:09:22

Re: drilling it home

Yes, I do believe Japan hasn't been hit since that subway gassing thing because of their extensive toilet-cam network.

May 24, 2006 @ 10:55:29

Re: drilling it home

We don't like to use the term "spying."

May 23, 2006 @ 11:38:42

Re: national security

Paul, if we don't put video cameras in womens' locker rooms, some female terrorists might plan their next attack under the surveillance radar!

May 12, 2006 @ 15:46:34

Re: holy humongous hurricanes

There's another one! Right over Lake Michigan!


May 12, 2006 @ 15:35:50

Re: sure bush, i believe you

"The NSA told Qwest that other government agencies, including the FBI, CIA and DEA, also might have access to the database..."



Don't worry though, they're only looking for "terrorists."

May 12, 2006 @ 11:00:18

Re: pissed off, worn out

Yes, get yourself lurned real good.

May 4, 2006 @ 16:37:26

Re: what's up my ninja?

I dunno... maybe it was on the wikipedia or something

Apr 27, 2006 @ 10:29:36

Re: mouse's movie musings

I was just googling my pet rat, and I discovered the super funny and odd fact that there is ALREADY a movie reviewer out there on the interlink named RatFacedKilla:


I'm so getting sued!!!

Apr 25, 2006 @ 18:50:48

Re: p0wn3z0r3d!

Funny, I didn't know there were an Republicans left in the North East...

Of all my posts that would suggest I'm messed up and in need of some help... why anyone would pick this one is beyond me.

Apr 20, 2006 @ 13:54:31

Re: detention camps?

I guess we know what the creepy camps are for now:


Apr 13, 2006 @ 16:03:35

Re: right message...

You were supposed to guest blog here. I suggested like three titles, which one did you go with?

Apr 11, 2006 @ 13:34:37

Re: history lessons

Wasn't there some study showing that tinfoil hats actually amplify certain frequencies into the brain?

Apr 10, 2006 @ 17:03:02

Re: history lessons

Somebody says 'lick' and Pam perks right up.

Apr 10, 2006 @ 14:38:59

Re: history lessons

I dunno though... our govt is so bad at keeping secrets and so incompetent, how could they have pulled off a huge 9/11 style plot without anybody leaking it?

(Arguably, people HAVE leaked it, and everybody calls them crazy. Maybe I just answered my own question.)

Apr 10, 2006 @ 12:42:26

Re: history lessons

Dear paul,

Clearly the government is very interested in you for reading my blog. Enjoy the paranoia!

In all seriousness, I didn't completely agree with the video, but I do encourage you to actually watch this particular one before you go off dismissing the question entirely.

Oh, and:

"Watchin' X-Files with no lights on, in le maison, I hope the Smoking Man's in this one."

Apr 5, 2006 @ 12:52:03

Re: kazoo!

As Christy pointed out, Wired and David Pogue of the NYT are full of shit:


Sure, this exact moment only happens once... then again every moment only happens once. However, there will be another 01:02:03 04/05/06 in 2106. And another in 2206. And so on.

Apr 5, 2006 @ 12:45:10

Re: kazoo!

Or the 2nd 01:02:03 04/05/06 today in the PM.

Or 06/05/04 03:02:01 coming up in May.

Apr 4, 2006 @ 20:27:10

Re: dear web masters

Wish I could answer that definitively.

The W3C standards are law as far as I'm concerned. Any rendering that doesn't follow the standards is a bug. Why the IE team should feel the same way, other than because standards are good for the industry... tough question.

Apr 4, 2006 @ 11:48:34

Re: bacronym

Tom Delay is resigning.

Apr 3, 2006 @ 14:03:15

Re: the tri-lambs (λλλ)

I do know that... but my brain usually ignores such things when I'm rambling on about lambda functions.

Apr 1, 2006 @ 01:13:21

Re: the tri-lambs (λλλ)

Nevermind the fact that each <div> could have been given an id attribute that I would have had direct access to... that's too easy!

Mar 31, 2006 @ 14:58:31

Re: if you read one...

If any of you watched to the end of the video, you will hear Senator Roberts utter the cowardly words "You don't have any civil liberties if you are dead."

I have only one thing to say to that:


Mar 30, 2006 @ 23:34:54

Re: why apple is morans

Why, why should I be happy with it? Why shouldn't I push it? What's wrong with demanding more.

Mar 30, 2006 @ 10:30:50

Re: evil pod people

I forgot to mention the part where two tool saws snapped while trying to break the cable on the lift system. Pliers of various sizes made basically no dent. Big shop scissors, though? That's the ticket.

Mar 30, 2006 @ 09:03:18

Re: evil pod people

Shit. Now he really, really hates me.

Mar 28, 2006 @ 10:44:07

Re: dear web masters

Second piece of comment spam ever?

Mar 27, 2006 @ 14:48:35

Re: if you read one...

You ain't never lied.

Mar 25, 2006 @ 11:53:07

Re: she ain't no human being

woah there cowgirl save some for everyone else

Mar 24, 2006 @ 16:13:57

Re: ohio voting fraud

That was a terrible movie.

Mar 24, 2006 @ 15:15:17

Re: ohio voting fraud

Yeah. He's a flamer! And he's trying to start a flame war, too.

Mar 23, 2006 @ 07:45:57

Re: ohio voting fraud

Evidence? Links?

Didn't think so.

Mar 21, 2006 @ 21:57:31

Re: mouse's movie musings

Ok, I just recompressed the video so it's 4MB instead of 11MB. If anybody can't watch it now, let me know.

Mar 21, 2006 @ 20:11:55

Re: mouse's movie musings

too ridiculous?

Mar 20, 2006 @ 15:31:10

Re: vlog verification

That's not me.

Mar 19, 2006 @ 20:31:18

Re: vlog verification

Well, I tried out all the instruments that come with GarageBand and all the effects that come with iMovie... that was fun.

Mar 19, 2006 @ 19:33:24

Re: vlog verification

It doesn't really... I added that in.

Mar 19, 2006 @ 17:27:34

Re: vlog verification

What do you mean?

Mar 19, 2006 @ 12:28:42

Re: ohio voting fraud

Can you say massive protests of any and all inaugrations where the voting is called into question?

Mar 16, 2006 @ 15:36:47

Re: s, a, t-u-r, d-a-y, hey!

If my new Apple isn't here by Friday night, I'm going to be the guy with the picket sign that says "Impeach FedEx"

Mar 16, 2006 @ 12:20:43

Re: really, i promise

Oh, you have no idea the glory I have in store for you all.

Mar 16, 2006 @ 12:19:56

Re: s, a, t-u-r, d-a-y, hey!


Bush wags the dog.

Mar 15, 2006 @ 13:37:53

Re: really bad intelligence

Did anyone notice Bush's grammar mistake?

Mar 13, 2006 @ 16:20:43

Re: getting the word out

"Illegal Immigrant Day"

Nice, Pam. Nice.

Mar 11, 2006 @ 11:12:18

Re: ohio voting fraud

What happens if you trip over the one power cord plugged into the wall? heh

Mar 6, 2006 @ 16:56:35

Re: open letter to john mccain

Well, I was going to write about the pimp I saw on Chicago and Franklin, but I wanted to be sure I wasn't picked up by the blogosphere again... I mean, it would have been a weird contrast.

Yeah, I have you in my calendar. Let's get crunked.

Mar 1, 2006 @ 10:31:29

Re: ohio voting fraud

I made a clarification in my article. When I say "paper trail," it is NOT sufficient that the voting machine merely log the vote to paper after it has been cast. The voter MUST verify that the log of their vote is correct. Alternatively, the system could use paper ballots that are kept for recount purposes.


Feb 27, 2006 @ 17:38:28

Re: ohio voting fraud

The "secret/propriety" argument that "keeping the machine secret makes them safer" is patently ridiculous. RSA, SSH, SSL, Blowfish, DES... all of the security and encryption standards everyone relies on daily are *all* OPEN standards.

Every time you do banking on the web, or buy stuff online with your credit card, you are protected with OPEN security standards.

If you use Firefox, and the web server you connect to uses Apache and OpenSSL (very common), then the entire transaction not only uses open security standards, but the whole entire thing is OPEN SOURCE.

Ask any computer security expert: secrecy never means security. It takes critical review by peers.

That's really not the end of the completely mind-boggling ridiculousness surrounding this whole thing. How in the HELL did machines that leave NO auditable paper record EVER make it into something as important as voting?

It doesn't fly for banks or hospitals or corporate records or anywhere else... so why voting?

Feb 27, 2006 @ 16:57:01

Re: ohio voting fraud

Too true elvinator. Sadly, a common thread in computer security discussions is that people are always the weakest link.

I've kind of scared myself at the revelation that there may be yet ANOTHER computer involved after the computer that takes your vote. I haven't heard any real dicussion about securing those.

However, the people who are fighting the hardest for our rights are pushing paper ballot trails. If a computer somewhere in the middle got hacked, the paper would at least tell the truth in the recount.

What if the hackers just change say 1.5% of the votes on one of the aggregation computers? Would there even *be* a recount?

Feb 27, 2006 @ 15:04:24

Re: ohio voting fraud


Some of the reports on this subject suggest an entire precinct in Mahoning County collectively reported negative 25 million votes. Not just one machine.

What does this mean? Some possibilities:

1. Many machines were tampered with.
2. The aggregated total from the machines was tampered with.
3. The machine that aggregates the totals from the individual machines is *severely* prone to errors.

The first option is not very likely, however option number two is just as likely, if not more likely, than my initial assertion that a single machine was tampered with.

Afterall, the results of one machine could be ignored and easily written off a single faulty machine. Whereas, hacking the results of an entire district would certainly draw much more attention. And as I have stated, negative 25 million votes / positive 4 billion votes, is exactly how somebody with the ability would draw such attention. (I should explicitly note that whether it was an aggregate machine or an individual voting machine, my technical analysis of the encoding of integers remains accurate for both.)

Too bad the elections officials just tossed the count out and put it on the books as another bit of 2004 elections trivia.

This really begs the frightening question: What machine is totalling the votes from the individual machines, and what kind of vulnerabilities does *it* have?

Feb 27, 2006 @ 14:12:32

Re: ohio voting fraud

Bringing 9/11 into this discussion just thins the waters of credibility around the very *real* problem of electronic voting machine failure and tampering.


Feb 27, 2006 @ 13:44:21

Re: ohio voting fraud

I clearly said to *petition* your Congress members... nobody is talking about shooting anybody.

Feb 27, 2006 @ 11:36:54

Re: ohio voting fraud

There is a helpful graphic on the front page of this website:


Some states have passed legislation requiring paper ballot trails, but there is still more work to be done.

Feb 26, 2006 @ 23:43:31

Re: ohio voting fraud

I don't have a problem with dropping a few F-bombs... but when somebody posts something where every other word is fuck followed by either liberals, muslims, gays, or jews... I don't think that contributes much to humanity.

Thanks for your comments.

Feb 26, 2006 @ 19:33:00

Re: ohio voting fraud

I saw the infrared ports... insult to injury.

I wish that the mainstream media would pick this up again. It's an almost taboo topic. If you talk about it you are still stuck in 2004, worse yet, 2000.

I didn't see any mainstream coverage of the Diebold coup in California, or its implications. It looks like CA is fight their Sec. of State on it? Good for them.

I'm happy I sparked even a little bit of netroots interest on the subject again (well, the blackboxvoting.org folks and others have continually been fighting the good fight) ... but I worry I'm preaching to the choir.

I'm going to try to get some version of this article published as an op ed in the local papers here. Gotta start somewhere.

Feb 26, 2006 @ 19:03:12

Re: ohio voting fraud

Sorry, I missed that.

Feb 26, 2006 @ 18:48:45

Re: ohio voting fraud

I hadn't heard of little Marvin until his name popped up in the comments today. Pretty interesting stuff. Off topic nonetheless.

We're not talking 911 conspiracy theory here, we're talking the very REAL issue of electronic voting machine failure. Let us highlight this distinction.

Feb 26, 2006 @ 18:47:10

Re: ohio voting fraud

I invite and ENCOURAGE any counter arguments. Hell, I'd prefer to be wrong on this one. Not being able to trust our national elections is a sad belief to hold onto.

As I was saying, I invite debate... and the first such argument to be posted that DOESN'T turn into gay, Jewish, or Muslim bashing or employ near monolithic use of the word "fuck" will not be deleted by the Operator.

Thank you.

Feb 26, 2006 @ 17:54:00

Re: ohio voting fraud

They don't have to "listen in" ... this is an open thread. They can just read it.

Feb 26, 2006 @ 17:36:10

Re: ohio voting fraud

Well Masher1, you seem to feel strongly.

We are just the voice of one man or one woman. If you would also take the initiative to petition your own government to officially censure the Bush Administration, now THAT would make an impact.

If the people of Canada, Italy, Spain, etc spent as much time petitioning their representation to officially censure the Bush Administration as they do complaining about America, or as we Americans do writing OUR represenation, we may actually see the change in leadership our country, I feel, needs.

Did you ever think of that?

Feb 26, 2006 @ 17:02:43

Re: ohio voting fraud

Well, that certainly paints a scary picture.

I would like to offer my moderating opinion and reminder that if these machines can error without intervention (they can), or worse yet be hacked, it doesn't take a conspiracy to defraud our elections.

Feb 26, 2006 @ 12:48:06

Re: ohio voting fraud

For the record Masher1, I'm not into wholesale America bashing. There are a lot of good people here who do a lot of good things.

Feb 26, 2006 @ 12:41:05

Re: ohio voting fraud

Well, I was trying to prove an entirely different point. But I understand what you are saying. Thanks for the feedback. Really the candidate is irrelevant to my argument, and I would have written the same article had Bush gotten the 4 billion votes.

Feb 26, 2006 @ 12:15:51

Re: ohio voting fraud

I believe I've found the original source of the negative 25 million story:


"That led to some races showing votes of negative 25 million, [the Mahoning County Board of Elections agency's chairman] Munroe said."

"'The numbers were nonsensical so we knew there were problems,' he said."

Mr. Munroe actually seems to attribute the negative 25 million count to human error on the part of the poll workers.

"The human error specifically was precinct officials getting nervous or overwhelmed by the number of people voting, and then failing to properly follow protocol to count the ballots in the machine, he said."

I'm not sure I understand this. They were using touch screen systems in Mahoning County. What part would the poll workers have played in the count? How could any human error throw off the count by 4 billion / negative 25 million?!

Human error or hacking... it actually doesn't matter. This is pretty simple logic: if even one voting machine can malfunction and lose or miscount votes (and it was more like hundreds nationally), the entire election could be defrauded either intentionally or accidentally.

Feb 26, 2006 @ 11:22:00

Re: ohio voting fraud

I'd like to point out that I think a less likely, but equally unacceptable alternative to the box being hacked would be that somewhere in the code the vote count is introduced with an uninitialized local variable. Many times when they tested this would have started at zero, and would have gone unnoticed. However, occasionally that uninitialized local variable would be *non* *zero* ... and the vote total would be off by whatever that value was.

Feb 22, 2006 @ 18:38:42

Re: a scanner darkly

They have enough money to have you killed.

Feb 21, 2006 @ 14:40:49

Re: L0Lz0rz!!111!eleven!!!1

Well, technically, it is some contributor to Google Video having a little fun at the expense of Google and the US Government. But, I still think it is shitty that Google even has this "feature."

Feb 20, 2006 @ 12:29:04

Re: stars at night, big and bright

In further proof that none of you exist, and I live in a world of make-believe... I just ran into Marissa downstairs... where she is working as a cook.

No, that wasn't her sister in Dallas.

Feb 20, 2006 @ 12:07:41

Re: everybody cool was born today

That's ok... I have no idea when yours is or even how old you are.

Feb 20, 2006 @ 11:35:58

Re: a scanner darkly

What were you doing in Nebraska?

Feb 17, 2006 @ 21:06:14

Re: mr. hero's opus

I'm pretty sure if he hadn't blown Jaws up that Jaws would want Bush impeached, too.

Feb 15, 2006 @ 13:47:03

Re: everybody cool was born today

Oh, I think it's Robert Fuchs... I don't know... he wrote some classical music.

Feb 15, 2006 @ 13:38:40

Re: a very merry ununbirthday

"and you smell like one too"

Get your monkey songs right!

Feb 15, 2006 @ 12:56:40

Re: hee haw

The Feds are really starting to piss me off again already....

Feb 13, 2006 @ 21:13:56

Re: hee haw

You are mistaking me for China.

Feb 13, 2006 @ 19:05:14

Re: hee haw


Feb 10, 2006 @ 10:24:46

Re: my hero


Feb 10, 2006 @ 09:12:49

Re: my hero

I still love you pam, even if you are Bush's girlfriend.

Feb 9, 2006 @ 09:54:57

Re: my hero

Here you go Pam, from the Reverends mouth...

TUCKER CARLSON: It's not hard to hear that [your remarks] and not draw the obvious conclusion that that's an attack on President Bush, which of course is your right to do, and I think completely fair. But again, it seemed very uncomfortable to say something like that in a funeral with the president right there. It seemed like bad manners.

REV. LOWERY: Well, I don't think so. I certainly didn't intend for it to be bad manners. I did intend for it to -- to call attention to the fact that Mrs. King spoke truth to power. And here was an opportunity to demonstrate how she spoke truth to power about this war and about all wars.

And I think that, in the context of the faith, out of which the movement grows, we have always opposed war. We've always fought poverty. And we base our -- our argument on -- on the faith, on the fact that Jesus taught us. He identified with the poor. "I was hungry; you didn't feed me. I was naked; you didn't clothe me. I was in prison; you didn't see about me." He talked about war. He talked about he who lives by the sword.

So I'm comfortable with the fact that I was reflecting on Mrs. King's tenacity against war, her determination to witness against war and to speak truth to power.


Feb 8, 2006 @ 12:28:39

Re: my hero

I agree. It was topical. Hell, Lowery was even mellow about it when you consider his history of kick ass oratory. I would just turned to Bush and said, "you are a fuck up."

If it wasn't an appropriate arena then why did the whole arena stand up and cheer.

Feb 7, 2006 @ 10:37:58

Re: redmeat relocated

Two more comics...



Feb 7, 2006 @ 10:09:26

Re: dear web masters

You must live in the FRENCH speaking parts of Belgium...

I realise you guys just got broadband like last year, and you still can't afford it on account of your poor underpaying IT jobs, so you only have a few hours a day at the Internet Cafe to figure out this thing we call the "world wide web" ... so I forgive you for your ignorance.

Feb 7, 2006 @ 10:06:59

Re: isn't that interesting

BIDEN: Thank you very much.
General, how has this revelation damaged the program?

I'm almost confused by it but, I mean, it seems to presuppose that these very sophisticated Al Qaida folks didn't think we were intercepting their phone calls.

I mean, I'm a little confused. How did it damage this?

GONZALES: Well, Senator, I would first refer to the experts in the Intel Committee who are making that statement, first of all. I'm just the lawyer.

And so, when the director of the CIA says this should really damage our intel capabilities, I would defer to that statement. I think, based on my experience, it is true -- you would assume that the enemy is presuming that we are engaged in some kind of surveillance.

But if they're not reminded about it all the time in the newspapers and in stories, they sometimes forget.

Feb 7, 2006 @ 09:05:39

Re: dear web masters

They make my life a living hell almost daily, so forgive me if I don't feel the least bit bad about annoying them.

Feb 7, 2006 @ 08:19:29

Re: redmeat relocated

They look so cute when you scan them!


Feb 6, 2006 @ 12:18:10

Re: redmeat relocated

The world may never know.

Feb 6, 2006 @ 12:17:22

Re: queer eye for the bear guy

The poop was just pooped. He put his hands on it and observed it's warmth and remarked with some joy that "this poop was just inside her butt!"

Feb 3, 2006 @ 07:49:47

Re: t.i.a. t 'n a

I've got a double layer.

Feb 3, 2006 @ 07:48:37

Re: did you yahoo?

uhhhh... you know... don't hold back man, tell us how you really feel...


Feb 2, 2006 @ 18:01:44

Re: sustained seasonal sounds

I swear there really was a mountain lion...


Feb 2, 2006 @ 11:25:55

Re: beer blogging

Well, you just got past the first step for everyone... it should be easy from here on out.

Feb 2, 2006 @ 10:49:20

Re: magical mystery tour

Man this is an easy challenge and nobody has gotten it yet...

Feb 1, 2006 @ 12:47:53

Re: semicolons are for winners

Wow. From your one comment this entire idea has just become a thousand-- NIGH, million! times more amazing in my mind.

Jan 31, 2006 @ 11:25:28

Re: not that it matters, but...

CNN is reporting that Dayton did not vote for Alito.

Either xoplcom has infinite political power... or the radio was wrong when it said Dayton was going to support Alito.

Jan 31, 2006 @ 09:42:49

Re: not that it matters, but...

He voted FOR the fillabuster... hopefully he won't puss out on the actual Alito vote.

Jan 30, 2006 @ 20:32:39

Re: not that it matters, but...

DO IT! DO IT! We can make you a website and shit.

Jan 29, 2006 @ 18:47:07

Re: breaking fall news

Paul pointed this out:


Jan 29, 2006 @ 16:44:33

Re: sick of tegan, too?

You wanna hang out with me when I'm drinking?

Jan 29, 2006 @ 13:30:16

Re: sick of tegan, too?

many a bra were tossed on stage

Jan 28, 2006 @ 16:00:43

Re: sinking ship

sssssshhhhhhh! They're listening.

...god, I used to be kidding when I said that.

Jan 26, 2006 @ 23:55:15

Re: testicular tanooki suit

They call it a "pouch" in the English translation. Specifically, they call in a "pouch" in a scene where like 30 raccoons stretch out the scrotum of one really old raccoon until it turns into a boat...



Jan 26, 2006 @ 11:47:37

Re: your eyes are stupid

it's in the comments of that dragon blog post... I should put it up on xoplcom

Jan 25, 2006 @ 23:12:26

Re: your eyes are stupid


Jan 25, 2006 @ 22:06:58

Re: your eyes are stupid

I actually made the dragon thing from the PDF. It's awesome.

Jan 25, 2006 @ 16:43:59

Re: your eyes are stupid

Epilepsy Warning: That last one made me want to vomit.

Jan 25, 2006 @ 16:14:35

Re: dissidence is before godliness

I'm not Jesse, and Paul's not Jesse, so why are you addressing Jesse?

Jan 25, 2006 @ 13:46:40

Re: dissidence is before godliness

I told Kate and Jennifer and Collette where I was.

Jan 25, 2006 @ 10:35:37

Re: dissidence is before godliness

The top image links to the bOINGbOING post... I made the bottom image myself.

Jan 24, 2006 @ 18:25:22

Re: wound up wordplay

I wasn't... but I just took a muscle relaxant... so we'll see.

Jan 24, 2006 @ 11:58:39

Re: here we go again

Fighting about abortions and foreign policy and economics is a waste of time when you can't trust the voting system.


Jan 24, 2006 @ 10:24:33

Re: here we go again

I was watching Old School just an hour before you blogged that... weird man. Just weird.

Jan 23, 2006 @ 16:39:06

Re: here we go again

I would never date a girl named Linda.

Jan 23, 2006 @ 14:15:14

Re: here we go again

Actually, that would be why I haven't been blogging.

Jan 23, 2006 @ 14:14:25

Re: here we go again

I could blog about how much my fucking back hurts and how I'm going to the doctor tomorrow.

Jan 23, 2006 @ 14:13:37

Re: here we go again

Yeah right.

Jan 20, 2006 @ 09:18:03

Re: karma kill

...it comes and go-oo-oo-ooes...

Lawsuit targets Million Dollar Homepage for being offline for 6 days:


Jan 19, 2006 @ 16:56:29

Re: did you yahoo?

P.S. A successful as the War on Drugs has been, a War on Porn is just what we need.

Jan 18, 2006 @ 19:14:02

Re: karma kill

SHIT! I just thought of a better title:

(karma karma karma karma) karma killmillion

Jan 18, 2006 @ 14:29:09

Re: vampires violated

The dude's got at least 4 websites I've found... they all look like something a 14 year old shat in 1997.

Jan 17, 2006 @ 09:17:53

Re: isn't that interesting

Journalist James Bamford, a plaintiff and author of "The Puzzle Palace: A Report on NSA, America's Most Secret Agency," said that "the spying program removes a necessary firewall that would prevent the kind of government abuse seen during the Watergate scandal."

Some people use the excuse, "hey, if you don't have anything to hide then who cares if they are spying on you? It keeps us safe."

What they fail to realise is, in addition to that argument being completely assinine and unAmerican, it's not really about the spying so much as the spying being illegal. And if we let the government do illegal things "to keep us save" it makes it very easy for them to abuse power by parallel arguments in a myriad of other ways.

Jan 14, 2006 @ 21:29:31

Re: a bed of evil and lettuce

Will do!

Jan 13, 2006 @ 21:04:25

Re: i want to believe

Mulder's poster has gotten an upgrade...


Jan 9, 2006 @ 13:16:18

Re: best winter ever?

Like anybody fact checks anymore! Lie all you want.

Jan 7, 2006 @ 10:46:33

Re: shout out

Your commenting appear to be broken.

Jan 6, 2006 @ 18:35:42

Re: like anyone can do that

That's it, I'm shopping at the markets on Nicolet for my noodle needs from now on.

Jan 5, 2006 @ 23:10:42

Re: like anyone can do that

That's more of 3a. than 4.

P.S. They tasted like SHIT.

Jan 3, 2006 @ 14:27:07

Re: look paul, no words!

We have a weiner.

Jan 3, 2006 @ 11:32:35

Re: look paul, no words!

But what does it say?

Jan 2, 2006 @ 22:31:17

Re: definite defenestration

And to my mom, probably, too.

Jan 2, 2006 @ 22:24:33

Re: definite defenestration

Appologies to my sister, fantastic brother-in-law, and my lovely niece and nephew.

Jan 2, 2006 @ 22:18:00

Re: definite defenestration

grrrrrrreat... I'm so glad that's on the internet.

Reminder: The theme of Pam's NYE Party was "Offensive Shirts."

Jan 2, 2006 @ 19:33:03

Re: definite defenestration

I suppose I could get the cameraphone pics from the aquarium onto my blog.

Jan 1, 2006 @ 19:11:40

Re: i forgot

Technology is great... except for that I have to wait to get home and onto my real computer in order to see how screwed up my entry was and fix it.

Dec 30, 2005 @ 00:31:53

Re: chicago, here I come

Anybody got any New Year's Resolutions?

Dec 29, 2005 @ 11:43:05

Re: another quiz

So is Paul!

Dec 29, 2005 @ 10:15:02

Re: stealing jesse's thunder (x2)

Why the hell are they wearing U of M polos?

Dec 29, 2005 @ 09:59:46

Re: stealing jesse's thunder (x2)

Keith Schofield is a goddamned GENIUS.

Dec 28, 2005 @ 09:57:29

Re: dora the explorer's death

DUUUUUUUUUH! Why'd you think I got it for xmas?

Dec 26, 2005 @ 12:52:14

Re: politics, please ignore (2)

My analysis, that it was wholesale spying, was correct:


Dec 22, 2005 @ 15:06:51

Re: goodnight



Dec 21, 2005 @ 11:36:25

Re: politics, please ignore (2)

I have to imagine they got me on their shit list already.

Dec 20, 2005 @ 10:20:48

Re: santa baby...

Not really. Maybe if you are afraid of touching ice.

Dec 20, 2005 @ 07:36:09

Re: santa baby...

I can probably accomodate that...

Dec 19, 2005 @ 15:46:25

Re: new leadership needed

I really enjoy how they are saying that if they had the same kind of sweeping Patriot Act-like powers in place before 9/11 they'd have been able to stop it.

And in the same breath they say they are only spying on known terrorists.

Ummm... you obviously either didn't know about the terrorists who attacked us on 9/11, and therefore wouldn't have been spying on them if you could... OR, you *did* know, but you didn't do anything.

I seem to remember a certain investigation finding out the latter was the case. I seem to remember a certain administration pointing to communications problems between intelligence agencies.

Gathering wasn't the problem. Sharing and acting was the problem.

Dec 19, 2005 @ 15:00:26

Re: new leadership needed

Or how about legislation to break your TV, your VCR, your DVD player, and your computer. Good for the MPAA/RIAA... bad for you, their constituent.

Don't elect these people.


Dec 19, 2005 @ 14:39:33

Re: new leadership needed

Apparently, your Senators and House Reps gave Bush the A-OK.


Bush won't be taking a fall for this.

I can't say this is real surprising considering your Congress attaches ANWR drilling riders to defense bills and legislates in such a way that will maintain the two party duopoly and legislates pro-corporate (MPAA/RIAA legislation for example) at the expense of their constituents' best interests.

How about the bankruptsy law changes to benefit the credit card industry?

It's time to start voting third party.

Dec 19, 2005 @ 14:33:48

Re: new leadership needed

This one was worth reading.

Dec 19, 2005 @ 12:06:10

Re: new leadership needed

Bush committed a felony. How much simpler does it need to be?

Dec 16, 2005 @ 15:46:18

Re: give me money

Video of how the new Nintendo controller works.

Dec 15, 2005 @ 13:11:24

Re: yo ho ho ho

In the world of Futurama Santa is a murderous robot.

Dec 14, 2005 @ 23:33:19

Re: so much for mpls

Finals are so... final.

Apparently I'm the worst Risk player ever.

Dec 14, 2005 @ 12:38:11

Re: so much for mpls

Oh, tomorrow is Bill of Rights Day, a National Holiday.

Dec 14, 2005 @ 12:18:37

Re: so much for mpls

The Ninth Amendment is really the most interesting:

"The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people."

Dec 13, 2005 @ 17:33:20

Re: gone daddy gone

fuck die

Dec 13, 2005 @ 15:54:18

Re: ho ho hogwarts


Dec 12, 2005 @ 15:20:57

Re: black orv... bullet holes

Hey ma, I'm startin' to like this kid.

Dec 12, 2005 @ 14:06:11

Re: black orv... bullet holes

"I knew you were going to say that."

Dec 12, 2005 @ 10:33:54

Re: the yolk's on you

How about 30 seconds?

Dec 10, 2005 @ 18:12:46

Re: ho ho horror

Where's my 500 words?!

Dec 10, 2005 @ 16:45:10

Re: drop me a line

Wait, I think he called you *a* drunk, but did he say you were drunk?

Dec 9, 2005 @ 10:08:48

Re: drop me a line

P.S. I think I'm spending all weekend in the mall.


Dec 9, 2005 @ 10:07:47

Re: drop me a line

I've already gotten two! One from Radio K, and one from my next door neighbors for helping them carry in their groceries.

Dec 7, 2005 @ 14:20:52

Re: ho ho hogwarts


Dec 7, 2005 @ 13:57:55

Re: ho ho hogwarts


Dec 7, 2005 @ 13:42:06

Re: ho ho hogwarts

YAY! When are we going?

Dec 7, 2005 @ 13:16:24

Re: someone set us up the joke

Whatever, then they tell on me.

Dec 7, 2005 @ 11:39:45

Re: it sucks! [rimshot]

No TPS Reports for me... just fixing the 500 broken uses of GAAAAAaaaaaaaAAAABE's submitform().

(I hope he reads this!)

Dec 7, 2005 @ 11:27:04

Re: it sucks! [rimshot]

Whatever, shouldn't YOU be working? Why do you need a pseudonym? Everybody who reads these comments will know it's you already.

Dec 7, 2005 @ 11:09:40

Re: it sucks! [rimshot]

Hmmm... if you want to go that route I know I've got some good word plays written down at home in my list of potential blog article titles... like, "Accidental Southern Exposure."

Dec 7, 2005 @ 10:54:26

Re: ho ho horror

"Prettiest Mess You've Ever Seen" really ain't bad... a bit long though. OOH! How about just "Prettiest Mess?" I really like that.

Dec 7, 2005 @ 10:14:10

Re: ho ho horror

Only one of the women I've dated in the last four years even knows I have a blog.

Dec 7, 2005 @ 09:42:50

Re: ho ho horror

"Lovers' Logorrhea" How about that?

I expect 500 words on my desk by morning.

Dec 7, 2005 @ 09:05:02

Re: ho ho horror

I suggest a regular column on xopl.com, Pam. Or maybe a serial.

P.S. All URLs are automatically link-a-fied, Jesse.


Dec 6, 2005 @ 17:16:23

Re: ho ho horror

I think he's saying it isn't as trite as the usual live journal fare...


Dec 2, 2005 @ 10:34:53

Re: rip roaring revelation

It isn't hard to find... besides, I got your invitation.


Dec 2, 2005 @ 00:00:25

Re: salty satire sans subterfuge

Sweet, we're all right there on the right path together.

Dec 1, 2005 @ 11:30:21

Re: salty satire sans subterfuge

Alcoholism is no laughing matter... unless the alcoholic is a clown.

Nov 30, 2005 @ 22:28:03

Re: new content!



Nov 28, 2005 @ 10:45:18

Re: why not

Not as funny in Safari...

Nov 28, 2005 @ 10:18:51

Re: also known for the flintstone flop

When did I ever give you any indication that I'd care if I did terrify them?

Nov 25, 2005 @ 11:25:03

Re: der gobbley gobbley

We didn't have Scrabble so me and my sister played Jenga Ship instead. That's right, Jenga + Battle Ship. Although, the plan is to go buy Scrabble so that we can actually play Scrabble Ship.

"You sank my Scrabble Ship!"

"This game makes no sense."

Nov 25, 2005 @ 11:21:09

Re: der gobbley gobbley

Stop leaving messages on my answering machine. It's not that I'm not home, I'm just not picking up.

P.S. wunderground has had a flu map for years.

Nov 23, 2005 @ 10:48:00

Re: walt's words of warning

You may not have realised that while I did edit the above comic, I sure didn't edit it much...


Nov 22, 2005 @ 15:25:37

Re: wave of the future

And we were all proud that we came up with that name for it............ (...)

Nov 22, 2005 @ 09:39:29

Re: no fucking way

Jesse found that photo on the interlink for me. I didn't even know he was here. What kind of minions don't notify their overlord of these things in a timely manner, HUH? I'm looking at you Paul and Jesse.

Nov 21, 2005 @ 12:36:12

Re: eye walk the line

I do? Somebody should have told me...

Nov 20, 2005 @ 22:42:58

Re: eye walk the line

I had to pay for them. But it was buy one get one free! And, if I'm going to be wearing glasses instead of contacts from now on, and considering my old frames were fucked, I decided to drop the bills on some sweet new rims. Spinnaz. Word.

Nov 20, 2005 @ 20:29:55

Re: eye walk the line


Did anyone see Family Guy tonight? The incredibly awkward spoof of the most awkward scene from Little Shop of Horrors? You know the one with the weird surrealism and the "Somewhere that's green" song? Incredible.

I love coincidences like this. I strongly believe that they are a sign that at that moment you are exactly where you are supposed to be.

Nov 20, 2005 @ 01:44:44

Re: eye walk the line

Alternate title: Spex Appeal

Nov 16, 2005 @ 23:47:32

Re: cyber sex sillys


Nov 16, 2005 @ 15:57:28

Re: dear bus that I love

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwww girl germs

Nov 16, 2005 @ 15:08:31

Re: dear bus that I love

All the times you pulled my ears?

Nov 16, 2005 @ 14:47:28

Re: dear bus that I love


Nov 16, 2005 @ 07:25:41

Re: shroud of turin's origin revealed

If you were working at work you could read my blog in the evening!

Nov 15, 2005 @ 00:07:13

Re: rolling [snowballs] in his grave

Here too.

Nov 11, 2005 @ 13:39:12

Re: it keeps getting better

awwwwwwww yeeeeeeeeah

Nov 11, 2005 @ 13:32:30

Re: it keeps getting better

No they aren't... my stats haven't increased at all.

I do feel a little guilty about being blog of the day without ANY CONTENT.

Nov 11, 2005 @ 10:32:08

Re: a nimiety of knowledge

It turns out that aluminum foil hats might actually serve to INCREASE the ability of the government to brain wash you.


Nov 11, 2005 @ 09:09:59

Re: ha ha randy kelly

Dover, Pennsylvania...... there's a Dover in PA?

Nov 11, 2005 @ 00:02:06

Re: mmmbop, doodle bop


Nov 10, 2005 @ 09:20:07

Re: why apple is morans

I fricken TOLD you Apple dropped the ball:


Nov 9, 2005 @ 17:52:13

Re: ha ha randy kelly

More good news: eight school board members in Dover, Delware who were pro-creationism got voted off the board.

Nov 8, 2005 @ 19:25:00

Re: vegetarians are eating the rainforest!

Vikings are just Scandinavian pirates. I had my wanderlust figured out... now I understand the rest of my behaviour.

Nov 8, 2005 @ 19:18:18

Re: fourteen-four, and ten years ago

telnet was grand.

Nov 7, 2005 @ 22:43:40

Re: fuck fox news

Speaking of which...


Nov 7, 2005 @ 09:06:10

Re: tend to my knitting

GM (or was it GE?) is moving 25,000 jobs to Canada. Why? Because they don't have to pay for workers' health care. We need a national health care plan.

Nov 4, 2005 @ 11:23:48

Re: you can't win

Kind of reminds me of my thoughts here:


Nov 2, 2005 @ 13:21:24

Re: mpr protest busting?

Despite MPR's efforts, there was a huge turnout. I'd say about 1000 protesters judging by the amazing size of the marching line as they left Coffman. Counter-protesters numbered low, as they were the half dozen or so people leftover. There were two police horsies that I watched go up and down stairs on the bridge over Washington Ave. I didn't know horses would do that.

Oct 31, 2005 @ 20:45:14

Re: i didn't have any turnips

I just ate my last peanut butter cup :-(

Oct 31, 2005 @ 20:43:18

Re: i didn't have any turnips

That's high on the funny.... GUAVAS!!!!!!!!


Oct 31, 2005 @ 15:51:48

Re: jesse's party

I stepped on the firebowl screen six-seven times. I wasn't even going to say anything.

As for my story, when there is no cohesion or mood because of the constant interruption and giggling from the beginning, yeah... it's not going to work. I've scared to bajesus out of many a folk with that there story. ...I shouldn't have even bothered.

I almost felt bad about the punkins when I read that they were homegrown. Almost.

Oct 31, 2005 @ 14:33:44

Re: happy halloween

sith is the awesome

Oct 27, 2005 @ 17:24:59

Re: down with peter lansky homepage

HAHAAH! Peter just be-friended me during his DJ shift! Now he's playing me a song, which he dedicated to "Zach ecks-opl-uh, better luck getting a real name."

I hope he joins the group so I can officer him as 'Arch-Nemesis.'

Oct 26, 2005 @ 21:03:13

Re: sorry about your pants


Oct 26, 2005 @ 14:50:53

Re: sorry about your pants

I got invited. I didn't go.

Oct 26, 2005 @ 12:33:46

Re: sorry about your pants

Well, Ryan Lubinski vanity googled himself and found my website. Somebody googled Elissa Mahlik and got to my site, but I don't know that it was her for sure like I know it was Ryan.

Oct 26, 2005 @ 12:06:02

Re: sorry about your pants

Actually, I was vanity googling myself... or maybe it was technorati... but anyway, I found your link to me. Otherwise I'd have no idea where your blog even was.

Oct 26, 2005 @ 10:12:25

Re: sorry about your pants

P.S. That's the worst attempt at HTML I've ever seen. Is that a semi-colon? To think I used to make out with you! I have to shower...

Oct 26, 2005 @ 10:11:05

Re: sorry about your pants

I haven't carved my one punkin yet, but I shall post a picture when I'm done. I usually go with something creepy, and usually Nightmare Before Christmas inspired.

Actually, I have a bunch of Halloween photos that never made it online. Mostly because I neglect my blog if I'm having lots of fun doing Halloween things.

Oct 25, 2005 @ 22:52:22

Re: sorry about your pants

Why wouldn't you post that comment in the Decemberists thread?

Oct 25, 2005 @ 22:17:23

Re: sorry about your pants

Speaking of movies... Prince of Darkness... what is half of the cast, and most of the characters, from Big Trouble in Little China doing in a B horror movie? And Dr. Loomis is the priest!

Oct 23, 2005 @ 23:43:05

Re: i'll think up a title later

<angel's singing> http://www.xopl.com/blog/rss/ </angel's singing>

Oct 22, 2005 @ 16:48:48

Re: i'll think up a title later

<penis joke>So am I.</penis joke>

Oct 21, 2005 @ 14:00:49

Re: breaking fall news

Paul claims it wasn't him.

Oct 20, 2005 @ 12:35:47

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

Original source of that video:


Oct 20, 2005 @ 01:28:47

Re: persistent poker

Most critical hand: 74747

Oct 19, 2005 @ 14:15:23

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

Do you, uhhh, zombie here often?

Oct 19, 2005 @ 14:11:27

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!



Oct 19, 2005 @ 14:04:26

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

Lindsey's at the City Pages chimes in:


Oct 18, 2005 @ 19:26:01

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

Oh, and I heard that Cannibal Holocaust was supposed to be the goriest movie ever. I saw that at the Uptown. It would be an interesting comparison.

Oct 18, 2005 @ 19:23:49

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

I might be interested... You should suggest the idea in this thread, too:


Oct 18, 2005 @ 13:46:00

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

That film is of classical stature. I have not seen it either.

Oct 18, 2005 @ 12:42:46

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

Which one is you?

P.S. Anybody know what zombiewaitress meant by "again in spring?"

Oct 17, 2005 @ 20:18:02

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

The best photos of the drip yet... and also my ketchup facial:


Oct 17, 2005 @ 15:39:43

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

KATE! Yes, that's right.

Oct 17, 2005 @ 14:09:10

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

Jesse found some more photos.


Oct 17, 2005 @ 11:10:47

Re: semi-famous sassafrassing

Printer Dots Decoded! Frame your friends!


Oct 17, 2005 @ 00:50:02

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

It's all good. Even I didn't know I was missing!

Oct 16, 2005 @ 23:26:06

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

That girl in white, in the center of the photo, that is a girl from the dorms from freshman year who recognised me. I thought she looked familiar. She told me her name, and I forgot it and asked her if her name was Jennifer, which is wasn't. Damnit, I can't remember it again. Fuck. I was talking to her when I got split up from the rest of you.

Oct 16, 2005 @ 21:19:43

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

Again? Spring?

Oct 16, 2005 @ 20:37:08

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

WOW! I'd never had thought that was possible.

Oct 16, 2005 @ 19:43:49

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

On a side note, the inner city kids wanted to know why we were ruining our clothes.

Oct 16, 2005 @ 18:50:36

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

Jesse found some more photos!


Oct 16, 2005 @ 18:17:38

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

Jesse's recap and pictures are in! Get them while they're hot! (They taste better that way.)

Oct 16, 2005 @ 17:54:05

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!

THE KETCHUP!!!! OMFGLOLX0RSADJFKADSJ! I was pretending to put ketchup on myself for more fake blood and Jesse gave it a huge squeeze and covered me in it. I got a mouth full.

Of course, like any respectable person, I swallowed.

Oct 16, 2005 @ 17:42:49

Re: braaaaaiiiiinnnss!


Oct 15, 2005 @ 00:27:10

Re: mupuls zombie pub crawl!!!!!!!

sweet delicious braaaaaaaaaaaaains

Oct 11, 2005 @ 18:53:33

Re: beating of his hideous heart

Well, whatever it was... it's gone. The only reason I even know they were in my apartment (besides the fact the animal detritus is cleaned out) is that my lamp was moved. Way to not leave any receipt guys.

Oct 9, 2005 @ 18:31:25

Re: beating of his hideous heart

Hmmm... but I see feathers in there.

Oct 9, 2005 @ 18:08:55

Re: beating of his hideous heart

ahhhhhhhh! That explains the odd odour that developed about a month ago when I would run the A/C. It smelled an awful lot like cat piss, but I figured it was probably mold or mildew growing in the A/C since it is obviously old. Turns out, it actually <em>is</em> piss. From the smell, it must be a rodent and not a bird. It's all clear now.

Oct 8, 2005 @ 15:29:25

Re: emily? elissa? emilissa!

If I saw a Petzold in Minneapolis, that would be kuh-raazy!

Oct 5, 2005 @ 15:08:33

Re: a penitent whaler

Czech out Emiliana Torrini... beautiful singer/songwriter. Probably more up your alley than Feist.

Oct 4, 2005 @ 21:40:36

Re: lamenting my latent lesbianism

Maria from Metropolis... you're supposed to say that.

Oct 4, 2005 @ 12:43:44

Re: put 'em up!

Jesse's response to my Photoshop:

md5( original ) == md5( photoshopped )


Oct 3, 2005 @ 19:46:38

Re: my social calendar

If you'd like to add an item to my social calendar, go ahead and leave a comment.

Oct 2, 2005 @ 23:29:19

Re: lamenting my latent lesbianism

Mary who?

Sep 28, 2005 @ 15:59:31

Re: unimaginable horror

I suppose it could be "You're weaving braids out the back of my head." I don't know what either has to do with gnomes.

Sep 28, 2005 @ 15:57:53

Re: unimaginable horror

"You're eating brains out the back of my head. Oh yeah, that's where the money is."

I'm sorry? What? The Spinto Band is on crack.

Sep 25, 2005 @ 19:28:02

Re: the burnsville blur

Scummy bars aren't scummy, they are homey... and you call them "dive bars." The alternative is an expensive commercial corporate owned bar where the girls are still slutty but they are also gold digging air heads.

And I don't even know what you're talking about since I didn't bring a girl home Friday or Saturday. Though, I have to say, nailing slutty bar tramps could be more fulfilling than going to the bar and not nailing the slutty bar tramps.

Sep 25, 2005 @ 18:06:07

Re: the burnsville blur

Yes, but you drink a lot of tea.

Sep 25, 2005 @ 15:50:04

Re: the burnsville blur

Face it teatotaller... all your idols were alcoholics.

Sep 25, 2005 @ 13:33:21

Re: untitled

I took the chore tool down since we've all moved out of Apartment #4.

Sep 22, 2005 @ 16:15:54

Re: immured in my methods


Sep 20, 2005 @ 09:32:07

Re: titillating and title-less

Dear Kingdom of Loathing users who come here looking for how to kill that pesky Golbin King,

I don't know the right way to do it, but I can tell you how I did it: I couldn't hit him with my gnollish autoplunger, so I put on an acid-spitting flower or whatever. Every round I just healed myself, and the flower did the damage for me. Slowly but surely.

Sep 20, 2005 @ 09:28:38

Re: symphony of 8 bits (updated)

Dear guy who found my site by searching for 'trent reznor mario world,'

I have heard the alleged mp3 with NIN playing the mario "cave music." That's all I know.

Sep 11, 2005 @ 20:37:46

Re: spyhouse's sybarite

I was just testing.

Sep 11, 2005 @ 19:12:34

Re: spyhouse's sybarite

Fucking spooky.... all that destiny shit I was just spouting, and then iTunes randomly picks this song I've never actually ever listened to before... whose opening two lines start just as I need some lyrics for my blog entry... and they happen to be the story of my life.

Then the song itself is basically the story of Di and I.

Sep 11, 2005 @ 17:14:00

Re: a farrago of fun

shit eating fuck pies

Sep 11, 2005 @ 10:23:29

Re: a passing parley

Of course they are snobby... Londoners are better than us in every possible way.

Sep 11, 2005 @ 02:07:33

Re: a farrago of fun

Dear bouncer at Williams: I will slit your throat and FUCK the hole.

Sep 10, 2005 @ 19:00:31

Re: a passing parley

Oh. Don't mind Christy. She had some sand in her vagina.

Sep 10, 2005 @ 09:42:22

Re: vituperous video

fun quotes:


Sep 8, 2005 @ 16:27:36

Re: it's the inflection

Comedy relief:


Sep 7, 2005 @ 22:33:47

Re: up in the mourning

Burnette said the zoo took pointers from the Miami zoo after deadly Hurricane Andrew struck in 1992, then the costliest natural disaster in U.S. history.

"We have worked closely with Miami MetroZoo ever since Hurricane Andrew, and we totally revised our hurricane plan after talking to them. We have a protocol we go through whenever we know something's brewing," she said.


So the zoo people have done research and developed a plan to save the zoo animals... but the feds can't do the same for people.

Sep 7, 2005 @ 21:12:34

Re: news flash


Sep 7, 2005 @ 18:09:56

Re: up in the mourning

Were those reported explosions actually the army bombing certain levees to flood the non-tourist parts of town?

Are they keeping the fringe press out?

Are they keeping the black people hostage?

Yes, to all three.


Sep 7, 2005 @ 10:04:03

Re: up in the mourning

I actually approve of this statement:

"Lt. Gen. Russel Horne told CNN the task of removing people against their will was a law enforcement job and that the military would continue to deliver food and water to the survivors still in the city."

I think that is smart for the military to be careful of what role it is pulled into, even if the local cops do need help getting people to leave the city.

Sep 7, 2005 @ 09:09:13

Re: up in the mourning

We're fucked:


I can't believe these politicians are spinning this to avoid taking the blame. You have no idea how angry that makes me. These are people elected by us, and are accountable to us, and the only reason they have a job at all is to hold our society together. And then when they fail, they push the blame around to protect their political party? This is not ok.

Sep 6, 2005 @ 22:46:58

Re: up in the mourning

If you're going to watch one pissed off reporter's editorial this year... here's the one:


Sep 6, 2005 @ 15:25:58

Re: up in the mourning

The US government should be forbidden from producing any content whatsoever that can only be accessed via proprietary means. Especially when it comes to emergencies. Right now important parts of FEMA's website are only usable with IE6 on Windows. Everybody at FEMA needs to be fired.


Sep 6, 2005 @ 11:26:15

Re: up in the mourning

Black people loot.
White people find.


Sep 6, 2005 @ 09:58:42

Re: up in the mourning

"The world saw this tidal wave of disaster" hit the Gulf Coast, Bush said at the Red Cross center. "Now they're going to see a tidal wave of compassion."


Sep 5, 2005 @ 11:06:37

Re: up in the mourning

Despite the discomfort, guests like Noel Rowell stay put. He has no gas and no money, so he, his girlfriend and three children do the only thing they can: "We're sitting back, waiting for the United States of America to take care of us."


Sep 5, 2005 @ 11:03:44

Re: up in the mourning

Our officers have been urinating and defecating in the basement of Harrah's Casino," Police Superintendent Eddie Compass said last week. "They have been going in stores to feed themselves."


Sep 5, 2005 @ 10:59:01

Re: up in the mourning

too fucking little, too fucking late


Sep 4, 2005 @ 22:10:06

Re: up in the mourning

Letter to Bush from Michael Moore.

Letter to Bush from New Orleans newspaper.

Interview video clip.

Sep 4, 2005 @ 11:16:54

Re: up in the mourning

"They killed a man here last night," Steve Banka, 28, told the Reuters news agency before he left on Sunday.

A body lies face down in water next to the Superdome. Death was everywhere, both inside and outside the Superdome

"A young lady was being raped and stabbed. And the sounds of her screaming got to this man and so he ran out into the street to get help from troops, to try to flag down a passing truck of them. He jumped up on the truck's windscreen and they shot him dead," Mr Banka said.


Sep 2, 2005 @ 11:07:49

Re: up in the mourning

With the government falling on its face to help people when WE KNEW there was a hurricane coming... what does that tell us about our homeland security, and what would happen if a city was nuked or dirty bombed or biologically attacked, etc. It tells us that city would be royally and totally fucked.


Sep 2, 2005 @ 10:31:15

Re: up in the mourning

Me to Radio K: You should play Fats Domino.
Radio K: Our Fats Domino CD was stolen.
Me: ain't that a shame...

Sep 2, 2005 @ 09:00:07

Re: up in the mourning

Apparently Fats Domino is missing... I didn't even know he was still alive in the first place.

Let's hope he was finding his thrill up on blueberry hill, above floodwater levels.

Sep 1, 2005 @ 19:24:02

Re: up in the mourning

Whatever... they've got it all solved. The day is saved.

Sep 1, 2005 @ 18:39:12

Re: up in the mourning

And they pay taxes. We pay taxes for them. Why should we have to donate shit? Where's the fucking Federal and State governments?

AND, maybe rather than saying the various coastal protection/restoration programs were "too expensive" we could have spent a *tiny* *fraction* of what the cleanup, rescue, and rebuild costs will be on some prevention.

Sep 1, 2005 @ 18:06:55

Re: up in the mourning

Sweethearts, not bleeding hearts, eh? Let us not forget that these are all red states... they voted for Bush... who was smiling and playing guitar yesterday for a press photo. Dick.

All these relief efforts are total bullshit as well. If there is one thing you learn from relief efforts, it is that most of the perishables (food/blood) are thrown away, and much of the money is wasted/lost/imbezzled. Money and food aren't going to do a damn thing... we need people to actually start BRINGING the damn supplies to the people. Get in your fucking boats and drive over there. How hard can this be? Commandeer some civilian vessels that are close, fill them up with food commandeered from stores... and get the job done. People are dying RIGHT NOW. Hundreds, if not thousands, of people were just dumped at the Superdome and Conference Center without supplies or help or officials to keep order.

They are telling people to wait. That help is on the way. That it takes time for the boats and helicopters and trucks to get down there...


Bush will try to tell you nobody thought it would be this bad. That's fucking bullshit. *ALL* the experts said this is EXACTLY what would happen if New Orleans got hit with a Cat4/5 hurricane.

Bush will tell you that this isn't the time to be political. This isn't the time to point fingers. What a fucking cop-out. Maybe if he hadn't cut hurricane/food project funding to fund the war on terrorism we'd be better off right now.

Bush needs to go... his whole administration needs to go. Everybody is like "pull our troops out of Iraq Bush." Well you know what? We can't do that. We're fucked and now we have to stay in Iraq. But what we DON'T have to do is keep these fuck-ups as our executive branch. Bush is right, we can't take our troops out of Iraq... but he's not the one who should lead them anymore. He got us into that fucking mess for all the wrong reasons, with all the wrong foresight. He failed. Flat out failed. He needs to resign, and let someone else lead our forces over there. That is the happy medium.. the compromise. The troops stay, Bush goes.

WTF does that have to do with the hurricane? Nothing at all. But Bush's fuckup on the hurricane is reason number 2 he should resign.

Sep 1, 2005 @ 09:59:26

Re: co-opting the co-op



Aug 31, 2005 @ 23:30:00

Re: co-opting the co-op

Hurricane relief.

Aug 31, 2005 @ 18:57:15

Re: co-opting the co-op

I for one welcome........

iPods? Signs of the apocalypse? That about the stupidest sign of the apocalypse I've heard all day.

Aug 30, 2005 @ 17:54:40

Re: co-opting the co-op

iPod != yuppy

Aug 30, 2005 @ 07:34:42

Re: co-opting the co-op

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh SNAP!

Aug 29, 2005 @ 21:36:28

Re: co-opting the co-op

I don't believe you. What song are you talking about?

Fuck. That sucks. Every girl I know has all her CDs stolen out of her car. Moral of the story girls: don't leave your CDs in your car.

Broke into? How?

Aug 29, 2005 @ 21:17:08

Re: co-opting the co-op


iiii juuuust caaaan't reeeee meeeem beeeer

Aug 29, 2005 @ 17:45:20

Re: co-opting the co-op

That's hilarious. I was just like, "I should make the Wedge a website and make use of the spiffy .coop TLD... wedge.coop." Turns out they are way ahead of me:


Aug 28, 2005 @ 20:45:46

Re: a passing parley

I just coined a new word! "Nergin" = nerd virgin

Aug 28, 2005 @ 14:32:02

Re: delicious danger

I've been watching a lot of Modern Marvels. I love shows about engineering. I wish they were even more in depth than they are. I used to draw very complex bridges, vehicles, buildings, and so on when I was a kid. If I was a bit more patient, I think I could have made a fine engineer. For now I'll satisfy my hunger with Legos.

Aug 27, 2005 @ 10:14:52

Re: possible peccadillo

And he actually was talking about her cat!

Aug 25, 2005 @ 08:14:36

Re: glorious gamepads

I'm hardly ever in there. Leone leaves me ESP mail, but I always miss her.

Aug 24, 2005 @ 18:40:54

Re: glorious gamepads

I've very good... very busy... new apartment, new job, and so on. No cats, though. Don't ducks eat cats? Or at least don't fuggly's?

Aug 24, 2005 @ 16:05:10

Re: glorious gamepads

Wow! Fuggs! LTNS man. Glad you found me... not that I made it very hard. How's you?

Aug 21, 2005 @ 23:46:59

Re: particular problems

Oh Em Gee Double-Yoo Tee Eff Colin is dreaming about talking to Christy on the phone.

Aug 21, 2005 @ 23:09:45

Re: particular problems

You said, 'grass!' haha

Aug 18, 2005 @ 17:43:46

Re: bust a recap in yo' ass

Hmmm... I should pass this on to the LL peoples. I should also add a link to the Radio K stream on their website.

Aug 18, 2005 @ 17:42:23

Re: particular problems

Also, I keep a lot of things secret, because I don't usually want to pollute my creative process by letting others give their input. I like to see where I can get on my own before getting help.

Aug 17, 2005 @ 23:51:54

Re: titillating and title-less

Wow, sweet. It used to just crash horribly... at least now you get a message.

Aug 17, 2005 @ 08:17:05

Re: titillating and title-less

You can't just say that... elaborate... tell us more!!

Aug 15, 2005 @ 17:53:43

Re: titillating and title-less

the salsa is for my leaving boss

Aug 14, 2005 @ 22:37:16

Re: titillating and title-less

I beat that Goblin King fucker! Then I summoned some noodles out of thin air and ate me some spicey ramen.

Aug 14, 2005 @ 01:06:46

Re: titillating and title-less

I have to make salsa Wednesday night, but other than that I'm free.

Aug 12, 2005 @ 19:11:00

Re: titillating and title-less

I'm interviewing Oneida on Tuesday.

Aug 12, 2005 @ 18:54:41

Re: titillating and title-less

I ran my dishwasher for the first time last night. Dish. Washer. It does my dishes for me, maaaaaaaaan.

Aug 12, 2005 @ 18:52:30

Re: titillating and title-less


Aug 12, 2005 @ 18:38:45

Re: titillating and title-less

And your building caught on fire. Sarah was all, "here's music I'm leaving."

Aug 11, 2005 @ 21:10:26

Re: nugatory noodlings

Fixed another long time misstep on my part. You can now put any <!-- characters <b> you want </div> into your comments.

Aug 11, 2005 @ 21:06:42

Re: nugatory noodlings

You tried. That is all that is really important. I'm routing for you Chirpy `JR' to the second power!

Aug 11, 2005 @ 17:38:39

Re: castigative couch and the k

Sorry. I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

Aug 9, 2005 @ 23:11:22

Re: castigative couch and the k

Well yeah... hashes only work if the message is the same... if you post, change the message and post again, of course it is gonna show up.

Aug 8, 2005 @ 23:22:28

Re: castigative couch and the k

meh, my bad for leaving a bug like that around. I just can't believe it took so long for anybody to run across it, and then so many of you did in such a small amount of time.

Aug 8, 2005 @ 23:20:13

Re: castigative couch and the k

well... whatever... it should be fixed now.

Aug 8, 2005 @ 22:50:15

Re: castigative couch and the k

ok... seriously... over a year of blogging, and then three of you double post back to back to back in a week's time? What the fuck?

Aug 8, 2005 @ 18:52:30

Re: castigative couch and the k

Those shirts are nice and all, but I bought this shirt today, which totally Trumps anything else. I went for the military green.

Aug 8, 2005 @ 18:48:25

Re: castigative couch and the k

Duuuude... the three of us need to take over MLC coup style! I got the clothes for it!

Aug 8, 2005 @ 17:29:04

Re: castigative couch and the k

My relation to Hanson is explained fully here:


P.S. Welcome aboard new reader.

I also find it interesting that two people in a row broke the thing that I should fix by using a hash. Hmmmm. I really should fix that.

She was hot... and better than Uma in at least three dimensions, I agree.

As for search... google does a way better job than I ever could. Just go to google, type in your search, and follow it with site:xopl.com, and you'll get everything you ever wanted and more.

Aug 7, 2005 @ 10:10:00

Re: moving & mario

What... the hash? Eat the hash?

Aug 6, 2005 @ 16:31:33

Re: moving & mario

which is exactly why - precisely why - I should hash comments

Aug 6, 2005 @ 11:43:21

Re: moving & mario

I should hash comments... then I could tell users that they are trying to post the same comment.

Aug 4, 2005 @ 23:54:09

Re: new content

Does the pope shit in the woods?

Aug 4, 2005 @ 17:22:01

Re: new content

I didn't say it was my first time at the MIA.

Aug 2, 2005 @ 17:30:54

Re: unbothersome badinage

For once sith, I agree 100%.

Aug 1, 2005 @ 17:13:13

Re: unbothersome badinage

I really should turn off anonymous posting. Or start showing IPs.

Aug 1, 2005 @ 00:07:07

Re: unbothersome badinage

There was a bona fide puppet show in the lawn of my favourite neighborhood house today. Twenty plus kids and clowns.

Jul 31, 2005 @ 02:05:43

Re: now doesn't it make you feel better?


Jul 31, 2005 @ 01:08:02

Re: now doesn't it make you feel better?

Ok... I'm calling off the contest. Nobody won. $46.16 was the right answer. Thanks for playing.

Jul 29, 2005 @ 17:56:08

Re: now doesn't it make you feel better?

you can earn more turns... xz built a maid for camp that gives away turns... not to mention eating/drinking gives you more turns.

have you joined our clan? you get lots of meat and knowledge for free if yer in a clan. 500 meat to be exact... a day.

ketchup on the blade?! GENIUS!

Jul 28, 2005 @ 23:55:51

Re: now doesn't it make you feel better?

Place your final bets.

Jul 28, 2005 @ 19:14:36

Re: now doesn't it make you feel better?

no dollars and very, very few quarters.

Jul 28, 2005 @ 18:49:03

Re: now doesn't it make you feel better?

Ok, it's less than $74.33...

Jul 28, 2005 @ 17:33:25

Re: now doesn't it make you feel better?

I was bitchin' for days to pam over IM about those fucking rats. But once you beat them you can go on benders in that bar. Hardcore benders. Need any equipment? I got lots of extra shite.

I thought you were maybe "danman" in our clan. But then again, that didn't sound anything like a name you'd pick.

indifferenceMan on the other hand...

p.s. you're all too low.

Jul 26, 2005 @ 17:36:50

Re: go team!!

WOW! My first comment spam ever!

Why their bot picked this entry, who knows!

Let's hope more bots don't follow... or they will ruin anonymous posting for everyone.

Jul 25, 2005 @ 23:00:36

Re: flummoxed lummox

kingdom of loathing dot com of course

Jul 25, 2005 @ 22:45:11

Re: flummoxed lummox

Come play Kingdom of Loathing... that's more fun than blogs.

Jul 24, 2005 @ 22:59:45

Re: flummoxed lummox


Jul 22, 2005 @ 17:26:21

Re: puzzling propinquity

I'll be in the woods for the weekend... all adventuring will have to wait til Monday... of course I'll have tons of them saved up by then.

Jul 21, 2005 @ 22:11:58

Re: dedicated to my domicile

Did you know that a cube 14.2 inches to a side of solid gold weights 2,000 pounds?

This would be the second show dedicated to metal I've seen on the History Channel today. During lunch they were teaching me about Aluminium. I also learned there is a frogger coin-op in the basement at work.

Jul 21, 2005 @ 18:44:59

Re: puzzling propinquity

I justed added Belinda the Blind, an accordian thief, yesterday. She's only level two. I think you have to be level 3 to join a clan, and level 5(?) to start one up? We should definitely have a clan, though.

Jul 20, 2005 @ 17:57:47

Re: puzzling propinquity

I just got me a viking helmet just now.

Oh, and I'm apparently in goofballs withdrawl for the next 100 rounds. Damnit. I knew I shouldn't have eaten those.

Jul 20, 2005 @ 17:52:38

Re: puzzling propinquity

I'm a level 3 pastamancer (noodle neophyte).

I have a six pound mosquito familiar named Gog of the Forest.

I've got extra items: spooky stick, oriole headdress, saucepan hat, knobgoblin pants (I'm wearing bugbear bungguard pants).

I don't know what to do with most of what I have.

Jul 20, 2005 @ 17:20:59

Re: puzzling propinquity

FairyWhite the Gay

I made the mistake of getting my character really, really drunk yesterday. Turns out you can't do much but hurt yourself in that state.

It's pretty much a learning experience every day.

Jul 18, 2005 @ 22:10:08

Re: so little time

When I went golfing yesterday we got carts and were spinning out proper 360's in the wet grass, and then Ryan drove straight through the middle of this double jetted industrial sprinkler. I got par on one hole. Today I sat in a meeting all day. The end.

Jul 17, 2005 @ 15:14:12

Re: so little time

Yeah, those are pretty durn cool.

Jul 16, 2005 @ 20:12:21

Re: day off

Going out raging tonight... hopefully there will be reportable shenanigans. I spent the day at the pool in Edina. Tube slide, zip line, and high dive excellence. No A/C here in the house you see. I saw Charlie and the Chocolate Factory last night. Meh.

Jul 16, 2005 @ 19:42:48

Re: day off

I ate at the Leaning Tower over on University... their phone number ends in 7474, their happy hour is 4-7, then I saw a girl int he parking lot with a tshirt that had 74 on it... I just looked up... 7:40

Jul 16, 2005 @ 00:48:24

Re: g.i. jooooooooooe

Seriously... what the fuck... since when was NIN all about home furniture commercials?

Jul 15, 2005 @ 17:21:28

Re: g.i. jooooooooooe

I got my prompt working! sed was the solution.

Jul 14, 2005 @ 19:39:47

Re: g.i. jooooooooooe

And don't miss JemCon in Minneapolis this Saturday.

Jul 13, 2005 @ 19:01:02

Re: unfettered and bettered

worst day of my life

Jul 13, 2005 @ 07:17:43

Re: unfettered and bettered

It's in St. Piggity... what's it called sith?

Jul 8, 2005 @ 17:21:35

Re: insulting injury

I spent my lunch hour on the phone with landlords.

Jul 7, 2005 @ 19:45:58

Re: insulting injury

yeah at least sith loves me

Jul 6, 2005 @ 23:43:32

Re: it's grape to be back

Holy shitballs.... my roomie just got home from his TCF corporate job.... at 11:30pm. They had him come in early today, too. At 7am. They want him in at 7 again tomorrow.

Jul 6, 2005 @ 23:28:49

Re: it's grape to be back

good, now I get mr. sexy all to my self!

Jul 6, 2005 @ 23:18:05

Re: it's grape to be back

Then the sith is gonna watch me pick out a new mobile?

Jul 6, 2005 @ 23:16:53

Re: it's grape to be back

oh... my pizza was on the menu as follows (sith):

supreme pizza (the totally awesome)


Jul 6, 2005 @ 23:13:10

Re: it's grape to be back

way to rub it in that you are going to my favourite beer place when my tummy isn't ready for beer yet. it is you who are the suck.

Jul 6, 2005 @ 17:46:16

Re: like riding the vomitron

I forgot to mention a great anecdote from shopping: I was in this store, and their racks made me bleed. I asked for a bandaid and the guy was like, "we don't have any." Then I said, "I'll bleed all over your merchandise." Then he was all, "Hold on," and he got me a bandaid. Dumbass. You didn't think that one through did you?

Jul 6, 2005 @ 16:58:00

Re: like riding the vomitron

Now that I'm a working man.. up before 7... excuse excuse blah blah blah...


right, chicago, blog, rsn.

I'll start IMing from work when I'm settled. That ain't gon' be fer a while.

Jul 6, 2005 @ 06:50:19

Re: like riding the vomitron

good mourning kids! so... I spent like half my first paycheque already. awesome!

Jul 5, 2005 @ 17:13:06

Re: like riding the vomitron

that was intentional

Jul 1, 2005 @ 12:27:50

Re: billy baxter's benevolence

hmmmmm... I don't think 29 is too young for 33. But that is a different four years than 19 to 23. Unless of course you guys met several years ago.... then you might be on to something.

Jul 1, 2005 @ 04:47:28

Re: billy baxter's benevolence

My boss... not my old boss, but my new higher up boss... she sent an email out today about our staff retreat. She told me I couldn't order booze as part of this group email, as if to suggest I'd be trying to order booze at lunch at a business function. Everybody got a copy of this. What am I? The office lush?

Jul 1, 2005 @ 04:40:37

Re: self-sustained suffering

I left my last shift an hour early. hehe. Nothing really happened. Pretty boring last shift. No more grocery science for me.

Jul 1, 2005 @ 04:27:46

Re: self-sustained suffering

You can blame the sith for that. I was looking for Pedro Almodóvar films, of which there were none anywhere, and sith was all, "This one is from Spain."


Jun 30, 2005 @ 18:49:30

Re: billy baxter's benevolence

Check out? Girls? Nooooo. I'm just looking to see if they are wearing cuter shoes than me.

Jun 30, 2005 @ 17:01:30

Re: billy baxter's benevolence

I am 23 years old. I am 6'2" 170 lbs. Blue eyes. Blond-ish hair. The radioactive pill has no side affects.... well, except for the very major one of making me temporarily radioactive.

Jun 30, 2005 @ 11:01:28

Re: billy baxter's benevolence


Jun 30, 2005 @ 10:57:29

Re: billy baxter's benevolence


Jun 29, 2005 @ 19:02:21

Re: irascible ions

tons to report... news at 4, 3 central.

Jun 29, 2005 @ 14:53:01

Re: irascible ions

deviled ham... aisle 6

Jun 28, 2005 @ 14:03:09

Re: polly want a craigslist?

...excuse me ...sorry ...I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

Jun 27, 2005 @ 23:13:33

Re: polly want a craigslist?

Anaconda's think capybara are delicious!

Jun 27, 2005 @ 13:32:29

Re: polly want a craigslist?

They domesticated the guinea pig (one N I guess) for food in Peru. It is in the wikipedia.

Jun 27, 2005 @ 13:05:26

Re: polly want a craigslist?

Sure... they roam free in Peru... or used to.

Jun 26, 2005 @ 18:10:55

Re: sure as a sherpa

Worst. Comment. Ever.

Jun 23, 2005 @ 16:00:45

Re: gee thanks, genie

You play quarters? Shit... if I'd had known that I'd have gotten you so friggen wasted. We played speed quarters like every day in London. I'm a goddamn pro.


Jun 23, 2005 @ 13:25:08

Re: gee thanks, genie

she'd turn your ass to stone or rubber

Jun 23, 2005 @ 00:22:56

Re: exigent experience excellent

This is pretty damn fun. I got 8/10.


Jun 22, 2005 @ 13:46:20

Re: exigent experience excellent

"by the time they pulled it out, I was usually too drunk to remember my own name."

You didn't really just say that... did you?

Jun 22, 2005 @ 13:45:01

Re: gee thanks, genie

If you wanted to make any large purchases, just imagine how long you'd be pulling twenties out of that wallet. And again the IRS would be curious.

Jun 22, 2005 @ 02:32:03

Re: exigent experience excellent

where did you learn that one?

Jun 22, 2005 @ 01:15:21

Re: exigent experience excellent

that reminds me of my favourite toast!

Jun 21, 2005 @ 23:17:47

Re: up and at them

oh, the scale said I was one hundred and 74.

Jun 21, 2005 @ 21:00:23

Re: up and at them

Does God know you escaped from heaven?

Jun 21, 2005 @ 20:56:54

Re: exigent experience excellent

I dunno Christy, you must look made of money.

Jun 21, 2005 @ 16:33:18

Re: exigent experience excellent

Be a man and ask her in person you twit.

Jun 20, 2005 @ 16:18:26

Re: blocked blandishments

I ain't making a custom chicago blog... I'm just gonna blog chicago here.... maybe

Jun 20, 2005 @ 13:24:41

Re: blocked blandishments

I haven't heard anything at all... that can't be a good sign either can it?

Jun 20, 2005 @ 13:20:11

Re: blocked blandishments

Yeah, I've had them do that to me when I handed in my app the first day.... didn't you say the department can request your application from OHR?

Jun 19, 2005 @ 17:45:40

Re: blocked blandishments

yeah and you'll get a couch that somebody died on after one of those drive-bys. I don't think all Ikea couches are shit... just the lowest of the low end.

Jun 19, 2005 @ 15:36:29

Re: blocked blandishments


Jun 19, 2005 @ 14:08:50

Re: blocked blandishments

dibs on the couch!

Jun 19, 2005 @ 03:16:49

Re: blocked blandishments

Christy, you already heard most of the details of Chicago anyway.

Jun 18, 2005 @ 04:15:23

Re: somewhere over the fd&c rainbow

don't go chasing waterfalls just stick to the rivers and the lakes that you're used to

Jun 11, 2005 @ 01:47:40

Re: somewhere over the fd&c rainbow

Ok, I'll add that next to your name that is already in iCal.

Jun 11, 2005 @ 01:13:07

Re: somewhere over the fd&c rainbow

Dang... I was at work. I'll be in Chicago til like Wednesday or Thursday.

Jun 10, 2005 @ 13:20:21

Re: done [been] drinking

Nice... well, there may be an opportunity the night of June 15th... maybe.

Jun 9, 2005 @ 14:06:59

Re: done [been] drinking

I don't know why I forget to blog about some of the most obvious things. Like the sitting in that park in the 80 degree sun reading "Haunted" until Christy finally came to give me a ride entirely too late. ;-) I still am surprised all those young mom's (turns out that neighborhood is MILF central) didn't call the cops on this weird guy hanging out in their park.

Jun 8, 2005 @ 14:44:24

Re: otter's odius opus


Jun 7, 2005 @ 21:28:05

Re: done [been] drinking

He's not really poor... and soon I won't be either. You shoulda hung out with me and I coulda told you all about it.

Jun 6, 2005 @ 23:48:35

Re: done [been] drinking


Jun 6, 2005 @ 22:24:33

Re: done [been] drinking

I did. Thanks for the sodie-pop.

Jun 5, 2005 @ 22:36:04

Re: done [been] drinking

I don't get a congratulations for my drinking? I always knew he was your favourite! [sniffle]

Jun 5, 2005 @ 15:17:24

Re: done [been] drinking

Irish Whiskey Highballs are damn good.

Jun 2, 2005 @ 13:49:01

Re: and i roll twenties

Actually, I think the term should be "TruBlogger" andSPIDER!!!shitshitSPIDErpisderSPIDerok that was close, phwew... one of them outside jumping kind.

Jun 2, 2005 @ 01:38:30

Re: and i roll twenties


May 31, 2005 @ 22:38:22

Re: rich like a dos interface

clever double negative... dude, I totally called him. shut up.

May 31, 2005 @ 01:29:40

Re: quantum quagmire

uh, the film slackers? nothing to do with quantum anything as far as I remember.

So, you are saying you won the powerball?

May 31, 2005 @ 01:08:03

Re: quantum quagmire

As each quantum interaction takes place, and each new universe is spawned, there exists a copy of me in many of these universes. I am me now, and they are me if something slightly different had happened just then. The transition into a parallel universe isn't a conscious endeavor. I can't choose to be in the universe where I won the powerball, because I (plural) am in fact in the universes where I did and where I didn't right now, both. Some other Zach isn't writing this right now, because he's off spending big wads of cash. And, some other Zach is dead from a meteor strike. I am this Zach who is here right now, taking comfort in the fact that there is another Zach right now who is ridiculously happy. Next time something good happens to "me" I will laugh at that poor bastard copy of me in the universe where that thing didn't happen.

ok, this is really hurting my head right now. I'm pretty sure the moral of the story is: everything that happens to me is up to me, because if I for instance hit my thumb with a hammer, I'm pretty sure I'll end up in the universe where it hurts. Short of that, wondering how the continuity works is painful.

May 29, 2005 @ 21:53:58

Re: saturnine saturday

go fuck yourself

May 27, 2005 @ 20:25:14

Re: abnegating admission


May 27, 2005 @ 20:01:29

Re: abnegating admission

Favourite swear word, ready go:

May 27, 2005 @ 15:19:46

Re: abnegating admission

If you haven't gone through the entire new york blog yet you better not be complaining about the lack of updates.

May 24, 2005 @ 21:46:31

Re: abnegating admission


May 24, 2005 @ 01:05:23

Re: a proscenium apollo g

down the memory hole

May 22, 2005 @ 13:20:48

Re: pimps plotted

Nice job on comment 747.

And yes, you can use it to find drug buying locations.

May 20, 2005 @ 19:20:58

Re: ablution of the blues

Especially considering your comment was comment #740.

May 20, 2005 @ 19:19:19

Re: ablution of the blues

I keep getting preapproved cards in the mail... I should get a new one just for London.

May 20, 2005 @ 13:19:49

Re: ablution of the blues

Sure... me and all my money...

May 19, 2005 @ 15:56:04

Re: a proscenium apollo g

hey hey HEY... other websites make MONEY doing worse matchmaking than this. Cough up the cash you two.

May 19, 2005 @ 14:18:06

Re: ablution of the blues

What flavour of non-eurotrash? And when can I come by?

May 17, 2005 @ 15:09:26

Re: latest and greatest

In theory I just start taking fake thyroid pills.

May 17, 2005 @ 04:54:39

Re: murderapolis

God, go to bed. It's almost 5:00.

May 17, 2005 @ 02:36:22

Re: latest and greatest

There were a bunch of cute little fuzzy yellow goslings down on the river flats. Mama and papa goose hissed at me. Oh, and I lost my damned cheque card.

May 16, 2005 @ 22:16:39

Re: latest and greatest

I've got that. Don't worry.

May 16, 2005 @ 15:23:50

Re: symphony of 8 bits (updated)

I started to play one of our two copies (one is sith33's) of FFII (I wanted to play them in order afterall) but I got distracted by something (it might have been beating Super Mario World or starting a game of Zelda 64 which I also didn't finish. I did beat Super Mario World though. Awesome game. I also beat Dragon Warrior, Zelda I, Zelda 3, and maybe something else... can't remember... during college.)

May 16, 2005 @ 04:13:23

Re: symphony of 8 bits (updated)

I beat FFI (usa) sophomore year of college.

May 15, 2005 @ 15:06:52

Re: symphony of 8 bits (updated)

sith33 pointed out that the iTunes store now has ALL of the original Final Fantasy music available as albums by Nobuo Uematsu! Rad as hell. There are also rock mixes by The Black Mages. Their version of the Matoya's Cave music is very well done.

Re-reading my post above, I wasn't as explicit as I would have liked. I really do think that the 8-bit composers of Nintendo were one of the biggest musical influences on today's indi artists. I hear bits of it in their music, especially the likes of The Postal Service and Mates of State, but the list goes on.

May 13, 2005 @ 16:26:35

Re: conversation corrected

Well, the good old RSN as it is known can mean any time between now and never.

May 13, 2005 @ 03:16:11

Re: conversation corrected

"Really Soon Now."

May 12, 2005 @ 03:49:16

Re: the mood of food

No key.

May 11, 2005 @ 17:04:01

Re: the mood of food

Mike was officially done with school forever yesterday. We went and got drunk, and came home and drank some more, in celebration. There was some impromptu karaoke in Jon's room, and Mike raged on the DVDs, throwing them all around the house. I was laughing so hard at drunk Mike I could barely breathe. Good times.

May 11, 2005 @ 12:26:27

Re: the mood of food

Nope... but if you ever do, make sure you eat it out doors. That shit smells like finding a two week old corpse in a locked, sweltering apartment. So I hear...

May 11, 2005 @ 00:56:02

Re: the mood of food

Yeah... I'll never forget that Indian girl employee who bagged my groceries the one time I shopped at Whole Foods. She was so friggen hot that when she talked to me I was like duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh... it was embarassing.

May 10, 2005 @ 23:01:33

Re: the mood of food

I guess I didn't state that clearly: I got confirmation today that it WAS two girls getting it on that we heard that night.

May 9, 2005 @ 16:04:14

Re: cosset the cat and owner

Oooh, I forgot to mention some good details. For one, Di jumped about 10 feet into the air when she turned around and there was a stuffed baby black bear looking at her. The other being the fact that they have a bright blue lobster at the aquarium. I wondered out loud, "Do you think it tastes blue?" I guess this family was nearby and the wife was like disgusted by my comment and her husband was trying desparately not to laugh.

May 9, 2005 @ 02:51:32

Re: cosset the cat and owner

Oh, and I sent this email today to some Senators:

"As a Senator, it is your duty and obligation to this great country and your constituents to read and discuss all bills before voting on them. Please be aware of the Real ID Act.

"What good is a National ID Card? It will cost tax payers billions of dollars, yet let us not forget that the terrorists who have attacked this country all had either legal or counterfeit forms of ID that allowed them access to secure areas at airports, flight schools, and airplanes. Will spending this money make us safer? No. People who are out to commit grave illegal acts will not be deterred from forging a National ID card just because it is illegal to do so.

"Moreover, forcing a National ID Card onto Americans through the Real ID Act will move our country one step closer to a police state. What is next? Should we have to carry papers to travel and live in this country? We never needed to before. Should we let the terrorists change American life? Doesn't that mean they win? You know Communist China forces THEIR citizens to have ID cards and present papers to travel and live and work."

May 8, 2005 @ 14:52:58

Re: a new track in the arm of life

My pops had that scar for awhile. Bitchin'

May 8, 2005 @ 05:29:30

Re: like donkey kong

P.S. Random blog entry viewing now available. Idea credit to the monster.

May 8, 2005 @ 03:56:37

Re: i-like-you, my haiku:

The pizza was done.
From the oven to the floor.
Worst day of my life.

May 8, 2005 @ 03:54:32

Re: i-like-you, my haiku:

The pizza was done.
Out of the oven, onto
the floor. Cry Zach, cry.

May 8, 2005 @ 03:45:17

Re: a new track in the arm of life

Well, it'd probably be easier at this point if they just found out I had Hashimoto's Thyroiditis like my sister (her antibody levels were 500 points above normal). Because if I don't have Hashimoto's, my high Thyroid Stimulating Hormone level of 7.19 would suggest maybe a pituitary problem (e.g. tumor). Normal TSH should be at most 5.0, though some say 4.5, and modern research suggests anything over 2.0 is a sign of problems. And if it's not Hashimoto's, and it's not a pituitary thing, then god only knows what the hell is wrong with me. Symptoms of Hashimoto's: "common symptoms are fatigue, depression, and sensitivity to cold, weight gain, muscle weakness, coarsening of the skin, dry or brittle hair, constipation, muscle cramps, increased menstrual flow, and goiter (enlargement of the thyroid gland)."

No goiter, and I'm actually more like a hyperthyroid in regards to weight, pooping, and temperature sensitivity (namely the exact opposite of the symptoms given above), but man my vagina will just NOT stop bleeding.

May 7, 2005 @ 18:06:28

Re: i-like-you, my haiku:

haikus are easy
five syllables then seven
blah blah fucking blah

May 7, 2005 @ 18:05:15

Re: a new track in the arm of life

Oh, I know what that something else was. There was this eastern european muslim girl in the lab waiting room. She reminded me of that old jewish man stereotype or something as she struck up conversations with every stranger in the room and didn't shut up the entire time I was sitting there. It was actually a bit soothing.

May 6, 2005 @ 04:36:16

Re: completely recockulous

Update: Ex-girlfriend's boyfriend is now her ex-boyfriend. The Deja Vu didn't pan out. I think the comment made by 74 might be the most insightful.

May 5, 2005 @ 16:41:58

Re: completely recockulous

That doesn't sound like me at all.

May 3, 2005 @ 04:16:36

Re: you're violent end

I just realised I shouldn't be doing contractions when I'm drunk... your violent end. your.

May 2, 2005 @ 14:08:53

Re: completely recockulous

"I knew you were going to say that."

May 2, 2005 @ 04:21:18

Re: you're violent end

I should have drunken blogged about the Tilly and the Wall / Of Montreal concert I went to earlier in the night. I really wouldn't want to be left alone with either the singer from Of Montreal (who reminds me of Ryan Hein) *or* the one dude with all the hair who is like half droog, half riding the white horse at all times.

Oh, and Tilly and the Wall invited everybody up on stage for their last song to dance. This one guy took his shirt off and girated in a total Chris Farley moment. It was amazing.

May 2, 2005 @ 04:17:01

Re: completely recockulous

And I shouldn't forget the story about the lady who called me an Indigo, either.

May 2, 2005 @ 01:52:45

Re: you're violent end

That moment has passed.

May 1, 2005 @ 21:03:36

Re: urinary tract inflection

Who is this 'ouchnospecials' who posted comment number six hundred and sixty-six?

Apr 30, 2005 @ 22:14:15

Re: urinary tract inflection

YOU get loads of money to start a business.

Apr 28, 2005 @ 00:37:33

Re: so don't try

hahahahaha nice... depressing, but nice.

Apr 22, 2005 @ 15:57:17

Re: di, di, di my darlin'

Don't even start. Last time there was a lull it was followed by some of the best material yet. I'll blog when something happens.

Apr 21, 2005 @ 15:08:00

Re: di, di, di my darlin'

Nice xz, nice.

Apr 21, 2005 @ 01:39:50

Re: di, di, di my darlin'

No no no those were OTHER girls. OTHER girls.

Apr 17, 2005 @ 15:42:03

Re: to the winch, wench

Those theme song moments in that movie are AMAZING! Funny I didn't run into you when I did run into Nathan Hall. We briefly talked about your (rightful) hate for Dave Mathews.

Apr 17, 2005 @ 04:57:27

Re: to the winch, wench

I'm never washing this cheek ever again.

Apr 14, 2005 @ 16:22:32

Re: annotations and alliterations

No... it is there, and not annotated. Some things are best left a mystery.

Apr 14, 2005 @ 12:54:55

Re: urine for a laugh

The best part is you can be both hypo and hyper. Your thyroid gets into this push-pull scenario where it is dying so it trys to compensate by making too much hormore, but then it is dying, so everytually it is dead and can't make any.

Apr 14, 2005 @ 00:33:25

Re: urine for a laugh

I won't know til they send me the results. I'm leaning toward "probably."

Apr 11, 2005 @ 01:01:10

Re: holy hell!

I strip html, to be specific. Somebody would leave a dangling tag... and I'd have to kill them.

Apr 10, 2005 @ 11:18:11

Re: sunday supervenes

You try ending a story with the words "the night's random cake."

That is the end of the story though... I just went home and passed out. Maybe I had Taco Bell first? Something like that.

Apr 10, 2005 @ 02:58:25

Re: sparkle motion lotion

I ain't got me no money to spend on fun in Vegas after I spends me the $229 to get there.

Apr 7, 2005 @ 16:57:25

Re: everyone's favourite amanuensis


Apr 6, 2005 @ 16:41:49

Re: everyone's favourite amanuensis

I thought the above fact would have been clear from my attempt at onomatopoeia...

Anyway, I forgot to mention that there was this young couple standing on their porch across the street listening and laughing.

Apr 6, 2005 @ 16:34:37

Re: everyone's favourite amanuensis

As if this weren't clear enough: She was *not* being raped. She was *definitely* enjoying herself.

[shoots look at sith33]

Apr 5, 2005 @ 21:03:53

Re: postprandial pitter patter

If he was a good friend he'd have brought his Digital Rebel and taken some photos of the view.

Apr 1, 2005 @ 19:19:47

Re: coffee chromatics

I'm totally tripping balls from that coffee still. I feel weird as hell.

Apr 1, 2005 @ 00:37:55

Re: i'll swallow your soul

Hmmmmmmm.... I just realised that because I've tied the icon to the user, if you change your icon, your icon is changed for all of your comments past, present, and future.

I should change that. If you comment with one icon, that icon should persist.

Mar 31, 2005 @ 17:45:40

Re: cuban, [land]mark

P.S. So did that vegetable lady, and apparently the Pope's on the way out.

Mar 31, 2005 @ 17:44:27

Re: cuban, [land]mark

Way to spread the hate into two threads Pam.

My blog has always been hit or miss. But, now that I'm done at MPR hopefully I'll have more time for antics.

Life's not been that funny lately.

Mar 31, 2005 @ 17:42:56

Re: pestiferous programming

Wait... so are me engrish bad to? Or just too technical?

And Mal: My life just hasn't been that humourous lately... There was the guy with the sore bottom, that's about it.

Monster.... haven't you decoded those 1's and 0's yet?

Mar 31, 2005 @ 12:16:58

Re: pestiferous programming

"No" and "yes," in that order.

Mar 31, 2005 @ 11:54:56

Re: honestly officer

To be honest, my first try didn't yield 52 meters.... but I did remarkably get 27m.

Mar 30, 2005 @ 12:50:08

Re: hope is restored

Meeeeeeemmmmmorriiiiiiiiiiiieeeeesssss, like the corner of my mind! Misty, water-coloured memoriiiiiiiiiiiiies of the way we were. IT WAS–

Mar 28, 2005 @ 15:47:35

Re: pecuniary parking

I wonder if 74's head hurts as much as mine right now? I don't know that we've ever not finished a game of Chess before...

Mar 25, 2005 @ 15:24:47

Re: bust a recap in yo' ass

Alcohol. The cause of and solution to all of life's problems.

Mar 25, 2005 @ 15:08:08

Re: an octet of urges

raaaawwwwt! pieces of eight! raaaawwwwwt!

Mar 25, 2005 @ 13:16:46

Re: blogosphere benefits

No no... I'd have to get onto boing boing first with something NIN related.

Mar 25, 2005 @ 13:10:05

Re: liar liar, anus on fire?

I just thought of a great sticker. It would say in big letters: "Republicans are welcome" And then in really small letters: "to go fuck themselves." One could put it on their shop door.

Mar 25, 2005 @ 02:35:40

Re: atencion: cinco cinco cinco dos


Mar 25, 2005 @ 00:23:50

Re: blogosphere benefits

I know what I'm talking about in regards to that single. I'm praying the album is amazing.

Mar 25, 2005 @ 00:22:40

Re: atencion: cinco cinco cinco dos

5 5 5 2... ASCII... groupings...

Mar 24, 2005 @ 18:26:40

Re: i'll swallow your soul

I think we all want to be a hot cowgirl now and then.

Mar 24, 2005 @ 03:34:23

Re: atencion: cinco cinco cinco dos

Your hint: ASCII

Mar 23, 2005 @ 19:05:49

Re: i'll swallow your soul

Wow... the satire barely came through all those dudes... but I finally got it.

Incidently, maybe I should start including IP addresses with comments.

Mar 23, 2005 @ 13:06:03

Re: i'll swallow your soul

I'm terrible with names, but when you have watched the three Evil Dead movies and Bubba Ho Tep as many times as me then it is kinda hard to not have learned Bruce Campbell's name.

AND, you cared enough to rant. So I win. Neener neener.

Mar 23, 2005 @ 12:35:11

Re: i'll swallow your soul

Oh, I'm sure he has one.

Mar 22, 2005 @ 17:28:52

Re: all mysty eyed

We don't all need Prozac, we all need to do something about the shit that's putting us down.

Mar 22, 2005 @ 11:38:45

Re: beer blogging

hahahahah, that'd be a great marketing device. Questionable legality, but amazing.

emit txen IICSA esu :EULC
dnuos_dnuorrus_ni_3PM/cisum/moc.ggid//:ptth :LRU

Mar 21, 2005 @ 15:09:04

Re: beer blogging

Well the box no longer says 8 x 16... it says 8 x 14.9 now.

And Murphy's has the button, too.

Mar 20, 2005 @ 14:17:33

Re: bleddy bear

He's my favourite artist. I'd murder someone for an original. Just tell me who.

Mar 20, 2005 @ 00:28:40

Re: beer blogging

Guinness screwed up... John went to buy another case of cans and the printing error has been corrected.

Mar 20, 2005 @ 00:17:33

Re: beer blogging

That doesn't change the fact that the box says 8 x 16 and the can says 14.9 now does it?

Mar 19, 2005 @ 18:58:52

Re: bleddy bear

Real life Luke Chueh?


Mar 19, 2005 @ 18:49:18

Re: episode 69: attack of the penis

Do you know the alien in question? She was singing in the bar in I've been told The Empire Strikes Back.

I tried to get Drawn! to pick up your portfolio cause I enjoy your work. They are a great blog, you should check them out: http://www.drawn.ca/

Mar 18, 2005 @ 11:53:55

Re: lachrymose lactations

Somebody who made mention of my chopsticks blogging in their blog also is a huge NIN fan. Apparently he is a bit worried about the new material, too.

The blogosphere is weird.

Mar 18, 2005 @ 11:25:48

Re: fugacious friends

Welcome aboard. You're not so bad yourself. ::wink wink::

Mar 17, 2005 @ 18:43:43

Re: lachrymose lactations

Wasn't 'Deep' after The Fragile... not good, not good.

Mar 17, 2005 @ 18:37:12

Re: busted by blog?

Well at least 66.6(repeating)% of that was surprisingly accurate.

Mar 17, 2005 @ 13:26:17

Re: rant rescheduled

There's no better day to start! Happy St. Pats.

Mar 17, 2005 @ 11:26:49

Re: rant rescheduled

Solution: start drinking.

Mar 17, 2005 @ 02:23:53

Re: it's technical

Is it because I strip tags from comments?

Mar 16, 2005 @ 13:13:09

Re: alaskan wildlife refuge^H^Hse

(Not a constitutional amendment... an amendment to a bill.)

Mar 16, 2005 @ 01:52:12

Re: question

I was really only at about a 3 when I posted this.


Mar 16, 2005 @ 01:42:45

Re: hail satan!

It would appear as though AOL edited their TOS for clarity. I still don't trust them, probably because I never much did in the first place.

Mar 14, 2005 @ 23:03:56

Re: gourmand's demands


Mar 14, 2005 @ 14:49:31

Re: futher appearances are perfunctory

Wow, that tchaikovsky thing is great.

Congrats on the marriage. If you need help with your registry, I'm your man!

Mar 13, 2005 @ 14:43:37

Re: futher appearances are perfunctory

It is the future... shouldn't I make a DVD or something?

Mar 13, 2005 @ 00:18:27

Re: hail satan!


Mar 13, 2005 @ 00:17:21

Re: futher appearances are perfunctory

I will be when I work next, yes.

Mar 10, 2005 @ 14:07:36

Re: retro is nowtro

Is that today?

Mar 10, 2005 @ 11:56:34

Re: retro is nowtro

I have those?

Mar 8, 2005 @ 21:21:42

Re: mumble jumble

Hhee, tihs dietilnfey wlil mkae a good PHP pitloofro pciee.

Mar 8, 2005 @ 21:20:19

Re: mumble jumble

I don't konw. If you've got a lnik to the sdtuy tehn sned it my way, I'd lkie to raed it.

Mar 8, 2005 @ 18:45:03

Re: go nowhere, get famous

I dunno, do you feel better about me?

Mar 6, 2005 @ 13:48:38

Re: new post


Mar 5, 2005 @ 18:02:02

Re: new post

Do you even need to ask? Working.

Mar 5, 2005 @ 02:45:57

Re: new post

Oh, and I slapped a 770 Radio K sticker over an 89.3 sticker at work, too.

Mar 5, 2005 @ 02:34:34

Re: following in faineant footsteps

Web design and web mastering both suck big bananas. I'd do web applications, though. You get paid more, and it is a cakewalk.

Mar 4, 2005 @ 15:09:00

Re: following in faineant footsteps

I hope you keep some examples around that don't look like that, cause you aren't going to get hired someplace worth working at with examples like that.

Nor would you last long at those places if you started producing stuff like that.

Mar 4, 2005 @ 03:46:49

Re: following in faineant footsteps

Oh, and it was especially awesome today when I was working on one of the documentaries (they each have their own unique design) that had 120 files, each with statically reproduced header and footer. What's better is that there was an index.html *AND* and index.htm in the directory, and they were both different and both accessible parts of the site. The guy who did all this has been promoted in the company at least twice now.

Mar 4, 2005 @ 03:31:48

Re: following in faineant footsteps

If everybody followed the standards exactly you wouldn't have to worry about whether it rendered correctly in your long list of browsers. You could write once and be done with it.

It is completely unacceptable for a browser to not conform to the standard. I'm not unreasonable, I don't expect every browser to conform to ALL of the standard immediately, so long as they publish which parts they've not implemented (which good browsers do) and they've followed the standard for the parts they have. If you disagree with that, you either haven't bothered to really think it through, or you are taking the opposite side just for the sake of the argument, or you are an idiot. Because I'm right, and any decent computer scientist with a quick glance at history could see why.

If you did anything sufficiently interesting with CSS you'd quickly come to realise that IE is a fiery piece of shit that ruins your life because 60% of the people still use it. All of the amazing stuff you want to do that is really cool and really maintainable and really fast and really etc. works on everything BUT IE.

The issue of whether or not people should write markup that conforms to the standards, well, I'm not going to be such a dick about that. However, not doing so puts a huge roadblock in the idea of write once, render anywhere, because browsers have to render your shit code. I'm not going to be a dick, because it is the web, and the browsers probably SHOULD be able to render your shit code.

But if you are a professional web guy, and you aren't creating something just for yourself, you look illiterate writing invalid markup. How stupid would you look if you submitted a C program that didn't compile because of syntax errors?

Mar 3, 2005 @ 17:36:33

Re: following in faineant footsteps

So I guess doctors are fascists for following standard practice, and architects are Nazis for following building code.

Mar 3, 2005 @ 12:24:21

Re: following in faineant footsteps

Whatever dude. There's a reason there is ANSI C, there is a reason there is IEEE float representation.

Abide by the goddamn standards.

Mar 2, 2005 @ 17:44:44

Re: mellifluous mulct

Actually.... we're just not college drop outs.

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh SNAP

Mar 1, 2005 @ 17:08:58

Re: mellifluous mulct

I wish I didn't know what you meant, but unfortunately I do.

Mar 1, 2005 @ 12:37:57

Re: sinister sleuthing

Me first.

Mar 1, 2005 @ 02:59:52

Re: mellifluous mulct

It really could use some animation. I know what my first Flash project will be now.....

The blue and the red configuration are the end points. The bottom four blue rectangles of the blue configuration are zoomed and rotated into the red configuration. Get it?

Mar 1, 2005 @ 02:39:02

Re: sinister sleuthing

Sexy! You promised I could test drive it! You did!

Feb 27, 2005 @ 03:01:04

Re: tubing tale

well, besides missing verbs, you also didn't say what kind of car.

Feb 25, 2005 @ 15:19:05

Re: opportunity knocks

I didn't think 'escape-car' sounded right.... me brain no right work

Feb 25, 2005 @ 04:43:54

Re: opportunity knocks

Damn typo.... through*

Feb 22, 2005 @ 19:04:36

Re: voluble in valkenvania

He dropped me off at my car, my car was fully intact, and I drove home.

Feb 20, 2005 @ 02:54:14

Re: lustful legerdemain

Way to go, you broke my sidebar.

Feb 20, 2005 @ 00:43:53

Re: maybe i shouldn't have stopped

I thought Megan living there sounded an awful lot like a cover story.

Feb 15, 2005 @ 15:38:23

Re: misplaced modifier, found

For the record, I'm sure halo 18 will actually be a single... we'll see if it comes out as an EP, though.

Feb 15, 2005 @ 04:29:35

Re: misplaced modifier, found

I was having problems with the video link at nin.com, so here is a direct route to the teaser.

Feb 15, 2005 @ 04:21:12

Re: evince, wince

I'm a terrible fan, CLOSURE on DVD. Before you lynch me, at least I didn't go and edit my comment to pretend like this never happened.

Feb 14, 2005 @ 17:03:45

Re: artichoke heart of darkness

That was kind of the point...

Feb 14, 2005 @ 15:47:26

Re: artichoke heart of darkness

With a little Lovecraft, and props to Conrad for the title.

Feb 14, 2005 @ 04:37:17

Re: evince, wince

Oh, and -1, Off topic

Feb 14, 2005 @ 04:33:57

Re: evince, wince

Nope. I also need to get Closer on DVD... VHS simply will no longer do.

Feb 12, 2005 @ 15:55:38

Re: flipper, finally

Our line-caught dolphin is 100% pure. No tuna are injured in bring you this product.

Feb 12, 2005 @ 01:10:40

Re: two many guys

New link to the old graphic in question...

Feb 12, 2005 @ 01:07:25

Re: pigs, all lined up

I haven't seen you on AIM in a long time Pam... you should log on cause I got a song for you.

Feb 12, 2005 @ 00:22:15

Re: two many guys

If you are implying I'd name my bastard son joey, you're an idiot.

I named him Zach, Jr.

Feb 11, 2005 @ 18:26:14

Re: pigs, all lined up

I've got the English multidisc import. 7 tracks total.

Feb 11, 2005 @ 18:00:49

Re: two many guys

no no... bastard is my preferred term for children conceived out of wedlock...

Feb 11, 2005 @ 16:33:22

Re: cookie crumbs in their coffers

Are you freaking kidding me?! Yeah, I work at Minnesota Public Radio. Do you ever fly out to St. Paul?

Feb 11, 2005 @ 16:31:49

Re: pigs, all lined up

Ok, so Halo 16 probably qualifies as a remix CD, but the remix you speak of is by Telefon Tel Aviv and probably has a little too much vocoder for my liking. Though, I do like other tracks on the CD, so I'd say we're about even there.

Halo 7 is a single for March of the Pigs, or more appropriately an EP. NOT a remix CD. Score one for me.

Halo 6 is definitely a remix CD. The Happiness in Slavery remix is amazing. +2 points for you.

My favourite remixes are on the Closer single/EP, though. Plus one point me.

I guess that makes the score about 3 to 3.

Feb 11, 2005 @ 16:07:35

Re: two many guys

I prefer the term 'bastard.'

Feb 11, 2005 @ 16:00:45

Re: pigs, all lined up

damnit.... [digging through NIN CD library sounds]

Feb 11, 2005 @ 15:59:02

Re: two many guys

Hi there Zack, thanks for joining us. I found you via BoingBoing. I read it religiously.

Feb 11, 2005 @ 13:15:07

Re: untitled

I was in Chicago with trampface for New Year's. We met up with Amrish and his then girlfriend, now future wife, that I set him up with. I'd imagine this photo was taken from the Sear's Tower.

Feb 11, 2005 @ 00:20:52

Re: pigs, all lined up

The remixes on the singles are way better than the remixes on the remix albums.

Feb 10, 2005 @ 17:00:57

Re: pigs, all lined up

I think I'm going to throw out my entire music collection and put The Downward Spiral on repeat.

Feb 10, 2005 @ 14:40:10

Re: cyber sex sillys

And I'm spent.

Feb 10, 2005 @ 14:38:38

Re: pigs, all lined up

If I don't have a tent, how come I'm pitching one right now?

Feb 8, 2005 @ 22:27:56

Re: tuckus turpitude

Videogames don't enter into it... killing hookers wasn't wrong in the first place.

Feb 8, 2005 @ 16:46:31

Re: tuckus turpitude

Actually, I was just going to make taco meat from the dead tutes in my freezer.

Feb 8, 2005 @ 01:22:44

Re: tuckus turpitude

I'd eat at HER taco stand.

Feb 7, 2005 @ 14:18:03

Re: tuckus turpitude

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh YES! Of course! We are projecting first quarter growth across all sectors.

Feb 4, 2005 @ 14:06:44

Re: discursively discusses dildonics

Funny thing is, I *too* googled tekoki at work. I was trying to find a picture of a tanooki, and my first misspelling had google suggest tekoki to me. So I naturally clicked on it, at MPR, which was funny.

Feb 4, 2005 @ 14:05:18

Re: discursively discusses dildonics

Are you kidding?! My BLOG is not safe for work.

A hardcore pic could end up on the front page at any moment.

Feb 4, 2005 @ 00:21:15

Re: seriatim


Feb 2, 2005 @ 17:51:33

Re: damnit, janet

Nothing happened.

Feb 1, 2005 @ 12:30:35

Re: extirpate and expatriate

Incidentally.... Christy, stay out of my freezer.

Feb 1, 2005 @ 12:28:06

Re: new meaning to 'drop ship'

Mike and John both know it is a fake. John walked in there and casually came across the letter and was like "What's this?" Ian explained the situation. John says, "I'm surprised they even told you that it fell from the forklift." Ian replied, "Well, they are required to by law."


Feb 1, 2005 @ 12:25:45

Re: new meaning to 'drop ship'

Damn it... if I'd been smart I would have written on the notice "Please call us immediately upon delivery," or something because he is convinced the letter is real. Then I could have laughed at all the telephone drama.

Jan 31, 2005 @ 21:47:39

Re: new meaning to 'drop ship'

Damn... he's not like FREAKING OUT like a big stupid baby. He just calmly decided to see if it was broken, and it isn't, so he probably won't even call customer service.

Jan 31, 2005 @ 21:41:13

Re: new meaning to 'drop ship'

Ian just read the letter out loud to Mike and followed it with, "So that's fucking great." He's plugging it in right now.

Jan 31, 2005 @ 14:22:21

Re: extirpate and expatriate

I like my hookers like I like my coffee: ground up and in the freezer.

Jan 31, 2005 @ 12:15:53

Re: extirpate and expatriate

smove® is my term. Please credit me for its use.

Also, there are few things funnier than killing prostitutes... or 'toots' as I like to call them... right before I murder them.

Jan 30, 2005 @ 05:12:54

Re: cub coupon crazies

Feeling better Sith?

Jan 30, 2005 @ 01:15:59

Re: film fact finally fulfils fascination

I'm too busy. Maybe later.

Jan 29, 2005 @ 00:37:16

Re: porsche pregunta

Yeah. It is old. FUCK! I forgot batteries for my camera.

Jan 25, 2005 @ 22:43:41

Re: cinema cellular celebration

The movie was sappy.

Jan 25, 2005 @ 18:12:30

Re: cinema cellular celebration

Special thanks to the Christy Monster for 2/3 of the work on my title. That is 66.6 repeating percent, for those of you at home. Did you know that 0.9 repeating is equal to 1.0?

Jan 24, 2005 @ 23:09:37

Re: i am alexander

There aren't any comments for the 22, 23, 24th in this entry. You need to go to just 'xopl.com' rather than this specific entry to read the new stuff. As for the 'not mom' business, that is just my doings. I run this boat, I can do what I want.

Jan 24, 2005 @ 04:39:20

Re: definitely fifth circle

She lives in the ghetto... "nord east minneapolis."

Jan 23, 2005 @ 16:33:32

Re: sophistry does not impress me

74: Done and done.

Jan 23, 2005 @ 15:49:48

Re: go team!!

I would also like the record to show that we had tea because we were cold and already drunk.

Jan 23, 2005 @ 15:19:48

Re: go team!!

Apparently, I should have pointed out that I've never used capital letters in my titles to Christy. That is the one edit I'm going to make.

Jan 23, 2005 @ 15:18:19

Re: go team!!

I would never exaggerate a story. Everything is 100% absolutely true.

Jan 22, 2005 @ 13:18:22

Re: six solid inches

So nice of you to join us.

Jan 21, 2005 @ 01:37:30

Re: i am alexander

Mrs Xopl sounds like my wife you dumb ass

Jan 20, 2005 @ 19:08:24

Re: i am alexander

cranial sacural the rapist

Jan 20, 2005 @ 17:53:20

Re: keep off the grass

My grass is looking nice as shit.

Jan 20, 2005 @ 17:52:19

Re: sophistry does not impress me

It was in fact my mother, there was an email to go along with it. She was like "Should I be reading this?!"

+1 Sith33

Jan 20, 2005 @ 17:47:04

Re: round-the-clock retching

True, I mean, the statement could be false afterall. Whereas assignments are always true.

Jan 20, 2005 @ 17:45:14

Re: sophistry does not impress me

I think it is definitely possible that the poster was actually my mom, though I don't know if she talks like that.... no control on guest posts and all...

Jan 20, 2005 @ 11:03:19

Re: sophistry does not impress me

I think I have a better idea......

Jan 20, 2005 @ 10:09:41

Re: crickets

I just got interweb back this morning. I got home and it was b0rken.

Jan 18, 2005 @ 19:57:56

Re: sophistry does not impress me

The gift that keeps on giving.

Jan 18, 2005 @ 19:31:30

Re: sophistry does not impress me

Naming the kid after me, that's what's crazy.

Jan 18, 2005 @ 17:41:58

Re: round-the-clock retching

Or that 'lush' and 'zach' are interchangable. You = lush is kind of saying "I am declaring that zach is a lush" whereas You == lush kind of means "zach and a lush are the same thing."

Jan 18, 2005 @ 10:29:29

Re: keep off the grass

Damn it. Would you look at my grass? Ruined!

Jan 18, 2005 @ 09:19:47

Re: keep off the grass

Was it you?!

Jan 18, 2005 @ 01:54:13

Re: keep off the grass

Okay, who can't read the sign?

Jan 17, 2005 @ 20:14:44

Re: oingo boingboing-o

Go figure a broccoli gets happy comment number 250.


Jan 17, 2005 @ 16:35:53

Re: round-the-clock retching

I would have also accepted the assignment operator in this particular instance.

Jan 17, 2005 @ 15:31:22

Re: oh, are they?

Then yes.

Jan 17, 2005 @ 04:23:50

Re: oh, are they?

Or today as it were. I guess technically you may have meant Tuesday. But you'd be a jerk then.

Jan 17, 2005 @ 04:22:48

Re: oh, are they?

I thought you said Monday didn't work for you? Yeah, I'd totally do Mongolian tomorrow.

Jan 16, 2005 @ 16:50:25

Re: oh, are they?


Jan 16, 2005 @ 15:35:46

Re: posting plans

Whatever, you don't drink.

Jan 16, 2005 @ 02:32:12

Re: posting plans

Ryan, Ian, Mike and John.

Jan 15, 2005 @ 06:38:34

Re: yodar

And that's pronounced "yoh-derr"

Jan 14, 2005 @ 17:04:46

Re: yodar

The cold kept us inside. There was some Ren & Stimpy watching and some Jameson drinking.

Jan 14, 2005 @ 15:23:57

Re: yodar

Man, I was egg sauce ted last night. But I slept from like 4 to like 3... so I feel better.

I don't know what 'everyone else' you are talking about. You're the only one who ever posts here sith.

Jan 13, 2005 @ 19:28:44

Re: increasingly indurate


Jan 13, 2005 @ 00:25:38

Re: update to downgrade

Stalker! Did you ever consider I was AT WORK FOR TWELVE HOURS TODAY.

Jan 12, 2005 @ 17:38:04

Re: "you're killing me"

I need glasses but don't wear glasses. And I really, really loved that strip, that's why.

Jan 12, 2005 @ 10:38:06

Re: "you're killing me"

I like your shoes. Give them to me.

You're banned for a year.

I don't even want them now.

Jan 12, 2005 @ 10:36:40

Re: "you're killing me"

Holy god does that band suck... I had forgotten the extent of their suckage. I totally would have picked a better band to work into a joke if I had known better.

Jan 12, 2005 @ 10:35:01

Re: "you're killing me"

I'm sorry Colin: I left my Heart in San Francisco. And if anybody there finds that cassette tape, I really want it back.

Hear me tonight I don't want to be
strangers at heart

Jan 12, 2005 @ 10:31:19

Re: leprechaun's lust for liquor

Oh, I dunno....... if I ever get a real job I'd have money to spend.

Jan 12, 2005 @ 02:16:51

Re: more of an asshole really

I'm whoring myself out for sith.

Jan 11, 2005 @ 17:50:36

Re: leprechaun's lust for liquor

Hmmmm... I have friends in London, Norway, and Germany. I'm not sure how long I could extend the welcome in London though. My research suggested it would take $2000 to do London properly. I have a big beer budget.

Jan 10, 2005 @ 21:53:49

Re: more of an asshole really

fuck die

Jan 10, 2005 @ 15:33:47

Re: more of an asshole really

circa instead of cerca?

Jan 10, 2005 @ 15:32:39

Re: eighteenth entry

I work 10 - 5 and 8 - 12 on Wednesday. So no.

Jan 10, 2005 @ 02:31:52

Re: miss mean mini-bar guard

I think I already gots planses for Tueday.

Jan 9, 2005 @ 16:22:04

Re: miss mean mini-bar guard

It's winter. I'm hibernating. And I tried to get you to UE with me but whatever happened to that, huh? Whatever happened to lunch in St. Paul?

How do you know I didn't steal those uniforms?

Jan 9, 2005 @ 01:19:34

Re: life's lessons largely learned

Let's have some.

Jan 8, 2005 @ 18:07:29

Re: collecting karma

Too bad that he's a PRUDE and DOESN'T DRINK

Jan 8, 2005 @ 18:03:41

Re: two many jobs

And you can't use Word... man it produces some nasty nasty markup

Jan 8, 2005 @ 18:02:19

Re: two many jobs

I might just quit, removing the need for such a tool

Jan 8, 2005 @ 04:29:57

Re: two many jobs

I only smell a little.

Jan 6, 2005 @ 18:30:40

Re: self-adhesive satisfaction

You could have NOT read it. heh

Jan 5, 2005 @ 01:21:01

Re: i.l.m. - illustrated lemony magic

I agree, it had problems. I'm just mad that you pointed out the truth.

Jan 3, 2005 @ 14:50:35

Re: math so massive it's meaningless

Things change from Dec 30 to Jan 3rd. It is still dick compared to the war budget. And, I'm pretty sure you'll find they like to appropriate funds and then never spend them (see Iran's earthquake, see Iraq's reconstruction).

Jan 1, 2005 @ 15:38:44

Re: i have seen the future

It wouldn't be the first time I blogged about a dream. It is a nice way for me to remember them later.

Dec 31, 2004 @ 17:11:08

Re: <easternblockquote>

Thanks, I couldn't decide between soviet block, communist block, and eastern block-- what do they usually call it? I thought eastern block was most right.

Dec 30, 2004 @ 19:09:18

Re: math so massive it's meaningless

You are also the person who pointed out to me that the $85 billion was an ANNUAL budget in addition to normal pentagon budgeting, and that about $200 billion have been appropriated and/or spent on Iraq so far.

Dec 29, 2004 @ 10:21:15

Re: waxing poetic [private parts]

oh yeah.........

Dec 28, 2004 @ 20:47:04

Re: you can't spell 'improvement'

Oh, I actually finished the marking up and got to do some photomagraphical research and copyright clearing. That was cool. I shall continue that on the morrow.

Dec 28, 2004 @ 19:51:18

Re: ubiquitous update

60,000..... I think it's awesome that Phucket is in the news so much.

Dec 28, 2004 @ 17:28:02

Re: ubiquitous update

When I made that image... that hilarious image... that stupendously amazingly hilarious image... only 24,000 were dead. Now that 51,000 are dead I feel a little bad, but not enough to do anything about it.

Dec 28, 2004 @ 10:37:47

Re: ubiquitous update

ohhhhh and I wanted to mention that a photo of my dead grandpa.... well, he nodded to me.

as for your comment, I quote the Homer, "It's funny cause I don't know them."

Dec 28, 2004 @ 01:39:00

Re: ubiquitous update

Shit and I totally fucking forgot to mention the Peewee's Playhouse DVDs I was watching tonight. It has been at least twelve years since I've seen an episode. So good. So, so good.

Dec 26, 2004 @ 17:03:55

Re: pam's props

I was going to do Xopl Claus's Chrimbo 2004 Naughty & Nice list, but I couldn't think of anybody for the nice list and the naughty list was too obvious.

Dec 24, 2004 @ 17:44:46

Re: pam's props

You like that shit? COFFEE *AND* PIE, BEEYATCH!

Dec 23, 2004 @ 12:32:27

Re: frosty the cocaine "snow" man

Welcome aboard moonie. ;)

Dec 22, 2004 @ 15:24:44

Re: i guess he has a point

I was going to say something mean to go along with your joke, but it is Christmas afterall.

Dec 22, 2004 @ 13:47:07

Re: i guess he has a point

I'm going to try them out tonight.... you'll get thanked if they work.

Dec 20, 2004 @ 22:05:45

Re: frosty the cocaine "snow" man

Wouldn't you like to know!

Dec 20, 2004 @ 19:20:48

Re: frosty the cocaine "snow" man

Actually a co-worker of mine said, "Yeah, we always used to make 'snow' men around the Holidays." So apparently this isn't a foreign concept.

Dec 20, 2004 @ 04:38:01

Re: the frogurt is also cursed

No but I almost did this Halloween. I went out and bought a children's book of those lame spooky stories to read in the dark / by flashlight / by the campfire (that's actually how the book is broken down). That story was in the book but I didn't bother since I knew the plot.

Dec 19, 2004 @ 17:10:24

Re: symphony of 8 bits (updated)

hmmm... I just realised updating this broke the old permalink. Good thing this is just my shitty blog that nobody cares about. Lesson learned for future reference.

Dec 19, 2004 @ 04:48:10

Re: cutest creature captured

Ow Owwwwwww!

Dec 18, 2004 @ 18:59:37

Re: cutest creature captured

Sexy new icon... too bad about you still being a boring person and all.

Dec 18, 2004 @ 15:22:46

Re: proper poem production

Clearly it wasn't a dialogue either.

Dec 18, 2004 @ 14:01:57

Re: proper poem production

'Twas the week before Christmas,
departing the house,
with the day off from working
I left and got soused.

Oh, the weather was chilly,
so just out the door,
I remembered to thank the
three layers I wore.

With my friend Ian joining,
we walked down the street.
I did talk about Megan
who later we'd meet.

Pracna's beer was two dollars,
so there we did go.
And I nearly did slip in
the new fallen snow.

Dec 18, 2004 @ 01:09:58

Re: proper poem production

You, sir, have a limiteder grasp of the english language.

Dec 17, 2004 @ 19:29:08

Re: proper poem production

Allow me to demonstrate what a dialogue looks like to somebody who isn't obviously on drugs:

"Is it St. Swithins Day already?"

"Tis," replied Aunt Helga.

Dec 16, 2004 @ 18:40:03

Re: employer's endless ennui

The way trackbacks are done now is also fucked, but more importantly nobody deep links to my blog entries so there is no need for trackbacks now.

Dec 16, 2004 @ 16:43:52

Re: employer's endless ennui

RSS is an inferior and dieing technology. I'll adopt the next gen equivalent when it comes around. I don't want some stupid RSS bot blindly and idiotically polling my site for updates, nor does the one person who reads this need an RSS feed of it.

Dec 15, 2004 @ 18:31:39

Re: employer's endless ennui

True. You did post comment number 100.

Dec 15, 2004 @ 17:34:42

Re: another day, another job

Ok, I've got 74's comments figured out. Now its just the dark sith who is obviously smoking crack for suddenly realising the pages end with .html or something.

Considering who 74 is I should have realised he was probably refering to architectural design rather than asthetic design.

Dec 15, 2004 @ 16:55:25

Re: another day, another job

Now neither of you make any sense. All I change is pagination and sith suddenly thinks content is statically generated. And 74... sith was talking about the software not the design so god only knows how it is you can agree with him on it being troubling.

For the record I use PHP-CGI, not the apache module. None of these URLs point to real files, instead the URL is parsed and the appropriate database rows are dynamically puked onto your screen. As for the design... it can either be ugly or gorgeous, but certainly not troubling seeing as it is very functional.

Dec 15, 2004 @ 09:04:03

Re: another day, another job

I'm still unclear as to why all of a sudden you think something server-side has changed?

Dec 15, 2004 @ 08:18:00

Re: another day, another job

What're you talking about, "And now you statically generate your pages?" What to you mean "now" I am? What makes you think that?

Dec 14, 2004 @ 19:55:00

Re: another day, another job

Come on, that had all the aspects of a good story: NOC's, LED's, plant cams, Garrison Keeler...

Dec 14, 2004 @ 14:27:52

Re: drowning in fd&c blue #2 lake

I can't and I won't..... until I'm older.

Dec 11, 2004 @ 02:17:29

Re: eavesdropping a deuce

no, it was a word play... eavesdropping / dropping a deuce

Dec 10, 2004 @ 17:15:12

Re: masterfully in the middle

You are a broccoli... that's the produce department, not grocery. I can't help you.

Dec 10, 2004 @ 16:09:16

Re: masterfully in the middle

Anybody need some rice? I'll never eat all this...

Dec 9, 2004 @ 01:15:47

Re: pubic crab cakes

Why April?

Dec 8, 2004 @ 22:12:30

Re: pubic crab cakes

didn't win

Dec 7, 2004 @ 18:26:23

Re: interview insurection

oh-for-three today. heh.

Dec 7, 2004 @ 13:50:36

Re: interview insurection

it seems to have stopped drizziling too

Dec 7, 2004 @ 12:28:54

Re: interview insurection

damn, nevermind. Turns out in the USA he used bollocks correctly... it is a verb here. Who'd a' known?

Dec 6, 2004 @ 04:27:09

Re: it's like that song...

your title is dumb, bitch.

Dec 4, 2004 @ 01:53:17

Re: mindlessly missed mentioning

go hell

Dec 3, 2004 @ 07:25:20

Re: sub-equatorial sunburn

sun came up.............. damnit

Dec 2, 2004 @ 19:03:11

Re: dnr denial

And a special thanks to my bro-in-law for sending me the link to the article.

Dec 1, 2004 @ 23:43:49

Re: crack-cocaine in the windshield of life

uhhhhhhhh.... he WILL kill you.... I wouldn't uhhhhh do that if I were you....

Dec 1, 2004 @ 23:42:11

Re: mindlessly missed mentioning

You're trying to piss me off and it's working. I suppose you would tell someone to give up the Beatles, give up Led Zeppelin, give up Ella Fitzgerald, give up the Howlin' Wolf? Cause they are done. Any blatant rip offs of them should go unmentioned. You know you are wrong. Before Ren and Stimpy there was what... Tiny Toons? Looney Tunes? Inspector Gadget? Gem? Ren and Stimpy bridged the gap between old tame cartoons and what we have today. You'd never have ATHF, Sponge Bob, Sealab 2021, and the countless of Ren and Stimpy rip offs that didn't make it far enough to be mentioned here. People wouldn't have even known they wanted such a thing. Look at the style of Ren and Stimpy. Example: the painted stills they would interweve that you see in Sponge Bob today as well as several Cartoon Cartoon's. What about the themes, the post-modernism, the subtle anti-commercialism? The voice acting, the buldging veins? Put any non-anime cartoon next to Ren and Stimpy and tell me who's their daddy? You wanted a rant and you got one.

Dec 1, 2004 @ 22:42:24

Re: crack-cocaine in the windshield of life

Damn. The numbers were 3 28 36 38 44 1, but I had 3 28 36 39 44 1..... oh well, I guess I'll just throw this ticket out. Better luck next time.

Dec 1, 2004 @ 22:05:06

Re: crack-cocaine in the windshield of life

Only smart people read this... please... "double entendre"

Dec 1, 2004 @ 22:02:17

Re: inappropriate hypothetical questions

Clearly you can't read.

Dec 1, 2004 @ 21:55:47

Re: crack-cocaine in the windshield of life

"hookers and blow" has such a better ring to it than "blow and hookers" don't you think?

Nov 30, 2004 @ 18:38:27

Re: inappropriate hypothetical questions

hmmmm... yes. Cherry and peach, probably feminine. Grape, mmmmmmaybe male. No real surprises yet.

Nov 30, 2004 @ 15:23:16

Re: inappropriate hypothetical questions

Perhaps people don't realise this question is COMPULSORY!!!

Nov 29, 2004 @ 17:37:01

Re: inappropriate hypothetical questions

Cherry. I'm pretty sure cherry.

Nov 29, 2004 @ 05:13:38

Re: sustained seasonal sounds

So far this month I've served 6000 pages, to over 600 hosts, and you sir represent 1.85% of my traffic. Besides me, your little sliver is the only other host to show up uniquely in the graphs. Congratulations, you are officially a stalker.

Nov 28, 2004 @ 18:59:56

Re: sustained seasonal sounds

Woah. I just got deja vu about having deja vu.... AGAIN. I have this memory of you posting something like that, and in the memory I have deja vu about the post, but realise I've only recently enabled commenting on my blog so I couldn't possibly be recalling a similar post by you. I just had deja vu, and then deja vu about my previous deja vu. I even went through the same "no, I just enabled comments recently" logic in my head.

Nov 28, 2004 @ 18:53:41

Re: sustained seasonal sounds

You haven't got a problem, you've got problems-- plural.

Nov 28, 2004 @ 18:41:39

Re: sustained seasonal sounds

But this is Wisconsin we're talking about. It's not like IL where they only got the big city and a few fields. Wisconsin has like year round hunting seasons, tourist fishing industry, forests, campgrounds.... gotta have a DNR. They'd cut education before they cut the DNR.

Nov 28, 2004 @ 16:28:54

Re: sustained seasonal sounds

Ok, so the DNR thinks I saw a dead deer.

Nov 28, 2004 @ 02:36:51

Re: sustained seasonal sounds

(taking notes)

Nov 27, 2004 @ 19:25:22

Re: sustained seasonal sounds

I was going to mention the snow... nothing major, just enough to make me scrape my car windows.

Nov 27, 2004 @ 19:00:32

Re: sustained seasonal sounds

Working at Cub til 2am.

Nov 27, 2004 @ 17:40:22

Re: sustained seasonal sounds

If anyone doubts me on my puma concolor sighting, I'd just like the record to show that recently several mountain lions have been hit by cars as far East as Kansas City, MO. (Not to mention that these cats used to inhabit all of north america.)

Nov 27, 2004 @ 02:11:21

Re: boingboing, gobblegobble

Why? It's not like anyone reads this.

Nov 24, 2004 @ 14:24:09

Re: the paddling of the swollen bottom

I just realised this is blog post number 74.

Nov 24, 2004 @ 13:19:07

Re: a series of unfortunate events

Sweet. I'm on boingboing again. I guess I kinda cheated by using fark this time though. heh.


Nov 24, 2004 @ 02:09:27

Re: the paddling of the swollen bottom

too busy working til 4am for you

Nov 23, 2004 @ 20:17:42

Re: semi-famous sassafrassing

I should mention that it was one of my roommates John who happened across the Yahoo News story while visiting Yahoo to check his email or something.

Nov 22, 2004 @ 05:24:17

Re: cats ask for it by name

Ali did the Fancy Feast facing today... thank god.

Nov 22, 2004 @ 04:53:09

Re: red ribbon rundown

no no no... you shoulda done a "FIRST POST!"

You woulda been the first, first post.

Nov 21, 2004 @ 05:01:17

Re: oh god no

rummybear.com was originally just a website with a very drunk bear, but with Bush stealing a second term I decided I might dedicate the domain to political news I didn't want to post here.

Nov 18, 2004 @ 02:27:26

Re: untitled

You heard the nice lady!