So, I was in Dallas, Texas last night surprising my older brother for his 30th birthday. His fiancé planned this crazy surprise party for him involving bartenders and caterers. The bartenders were in this band Space Cadet. I think I've heard of them. And the cook must have been the sister of this girl Marissa I know from dorm life. Anyway, my sister and her husband were also down there. We let the first surprise go on without us while we hid upstairs, so we could do a second surprise attack. I was actually telling my [apparently not] "Scariest Story Ever" and one of my bro's friends walked in at the exact moment of the climax. Don't you hate it when that happens? Someone walking in on the climax...
Anyway, after a few minutes I worked my way downstairs over to my bro without him seeing me and I was like, "So, can I get you a beer or something?" and he was pretty dumbfounded.
Their apartment was totally insane. I couldn't even begin to describe it. The catered food was amazingly delicious... crab cakes and beef tenderloin medalions... that kind of thing. Open bar. No Beluga Whale caviar... they aren't that kind of rich.
Plenty of babes with their yabos hanging out. Patricia-Arquette-looking-bitch was there, too... Looks just like her, only hotter. My brother's assistants were at the party. Hot female assistants. He's got me beat on that front.
It was like 80 degrees there two days ago... some sort of record. Leaving this morning it was 20 and raining. I literally counted 50 crashed cars on the way to the airport. An SUV in the oncoming lane of the freeway spun out and hit the rail with a terrible screech right as we drove by. These people can't handle even a tiny bit of ice or rain. They were closing down roads. They are a bunch of vajayjay's when it comes to winter.
Wait a minute, you went to Dallas?
you know what when I was in FL this week w/ my dad & stepmom, Jen kept telling me how she had to call your sister Megan b/c she ordered some jewelry and had to get it to Megan before she left for her trip.
In further proof that none of you exist, and I live in a world of make-believe... I just ran into Marissa downstairs... where she is working as a cook.
No, that wasn't her sister in Dallas.