Locale: St. Paul
Profile: I am a very sexy person.
He said he was just planning to have you support him
But she's so cheery and minnesotan!
From what I hear (thanks Dani!), the childrens' underpants would fit just fine..
I'm sure it was an "accident" ...
To be fair, the car isn't made by an airplane company. The airplanes are made by an airplane company, the cars are made by GM ...
Dear Dani: you don't see him often because he's sneaking around behind your back with a damn tramp. Slap him next time you see him. Then spit in his face.
What the devil?
You have a Wii too? Everybody's got nice stuff but me (I want a car I want a jet-ski) </deadmilkmen>
Zach, where are you? You're not online. I'm scared.
Also, you should buy a Wii. I don't have a TV, so I can't get one. But you could. And then I could hang out.
Monkey versus Donkey, Monkey versus Donkey, Monkey versus Donkey
Cause I don't have your digits Pamela...
Zach quote of the day, in response to "who is she?"
"Some girl I made out with awhile ago... "
Zach, you're a classy man.
So where else does she have tattoos?
And she smokes...
Yah, but... SARAH
You should have married Sarah when you had the chance.
Zach - you can't cure depression with $20 used bikes. You cure depression with Macbooks and plasma TVs. Idiot.
Zach. Your blog does not make me entertained anymore.
Sick sex is the bomb. It's all "uNF uNF cough uNF uNF cough" man that's so hot...
and also C) Doesn't come comfort you in your sickness, but instead sleeps with your friend
Xopl sold out to the relationship crowd. Cry.
First blog in 4 days and it's this crap? Bah.
So... We need an oxy-acetylene torch then, eh?
I love Papanikolopoulos. Did you have class with him? He's been over here a few times for TechTalk and whatnot.
I have a friend with a garage, lots of tools, and an interest in buying a welder, if you have any great mechanical geek ideas ...
Thanks again for the help. It was rocking.
Folks, Zach sold out. He's not a geek anymore. Deal.
It was me. Don't tell anyone.
Blogging at 7:41am eh? You may be addicted.
Yeah, way to loan the gov't money to help finance a war that's killing Iraqis every day. Well done there.
Oh wait, I read on IMDB, I get it now. Damn.
I heard about this ... it sounded like a hoax though... or, blair witch syle. What's the deal?
Well no, but ... still...
Hey, you were like 15 feet away from me, how come you didn't call?
Hey, you shouldn't talk like that about Linda. She's a nice girl.
Your page has gone sort of link happy. How about some news on your personal life? I hear you're sleeping with a new girl.
That would have been funny if it weren't for the and gate. The and gate just made it sad. Poor lame Zach. Just think of how much time you'll have to make geek jokes when your department gets closed!
I'm reporting you to the DHS. Terrorist.
Ok, now who's going to create Merry ajaXmas?
Ian doesn't have a girlfriend, that's crazy talk.
I think it's time for a DDoS...
Heh. The US Chamber of Commerce wants to tax hybrids because right now they might not be paying enough road taxes due to decreased fuel consumption. I... errr.. whaaaa?
Holy shit, CNN has a flu map. They show you which states have different levels of flu activity. Why? Gahhhh
Holy Shit. The Wal-Mart Corporate Affairs Director is the most amazing spin doctor I've ever seen. Wal-Mart is a caring, sharing, happy organization, bent on making me feel comfortable. Must eat brains.
Man... is anyone watching CNN? Oh man... I think I hate America.
How'd you get your healthcare to pay for glasses? They only paid for my eye exam...
Hmm... this is interesting news... interesting indeed...
It's a lost cause man. Zach doesn't believe in the future of these internets thingys...
I'll sign up for the 26th mill horror tour, and punk rock holocaust.
Well, fuck you then.
That's no Cthulhu!
A #1 at Jimmy Johns as 1700mg of sodium. Holy fuck.
You're right. I should start drinking and picking up slutty girls at scummy bars. That will fulfill my life!
Kidding of course Zach, I respect your lifestyle choices.
I would assume that, were you not drunk at this very moment, you would have spelled it "teetotaler," as in teetotalism.
What about Ian MacKaye?
I was expecting a location-oriented database of your media, not a fucking picture. At the very least, I want mouseovers of the pictures linking back to IMDB or Amazon with the relevant info. Mine your data!
Also, your drunken antics sadden me.
Found scrawled on a bathroom wall at the U: "Maybe Bush will invite me to Trent Lott's porch"
Heh. Liberal bathroom graffiti. Gotta love the U.
Did you change fonts or is my computer broken? If it's the former, it sucks. If it's the latter, you suck.
Did he decide you weren't cool enough?
heh, on the pawn america ad: "Are you tired of waiting in line to do business with someone behind bullet proof glass? What are they afraid of?"
Oh... I dunno... Bullets?
Uhh, aren't you in London? And... don't worry, I don't remember last week.
"We finally cleaned up public housing in New Orleans. We couldn't do it, but God did."
Those republicans rock.
But how could you have FEMA without <MARQUEE> tags! Or, do other browsers support those nowadays? Or did they just get tossed?
I think George W Bush is dumb. That is all.
They found him a while ago. Or at least, they know he got out safe, cause there was a picture of him getting loaded off a boat after being rescued.
And now Dubya's gonna show up and give people hugs and say "We're gonna win!" ra ra. Fucking hell.
Oh, even better, Michael Fucking Chertoff on NPR saying that he hadn't heard about the folks at the convention center, and that NPR shouldn't believe rumors (they had a fucking reporter at the convention center), and then said the folks there should just go somewhere with food...
I want to go to the state fair.
And by Hurricane Relief you mean drinking, hu?
Wanna go to the state fair?
What's everyone up to for the next few days?
But if you were a member of the Cult of Apple, you would welcome the impending apocalypse with open arms. That's why it's the best. Don't you want to experience the full power of the dark side?
iPod makes girls sexy
You have to remember, I'm not so good with this technology stuff.
Also Christy, in reference to your post in the last blog entry - the reason I can't call or email you is that I don't know your phone number or email address.
Wow, that does suck. And the cigarette smoking is especially mean. God obviously wants you to have an iPod. Not till after the new ones get unveiled on tuesday though.
Also, I'm not so sure on the mates of state...
Ruh Roh. Uptown is polluting Zach's mind! This is very sad.
I want to hang out with Christy again. Can it be done?
Also - Christy, are we are the point where I'm allowed to talk to you directly via the interweb, or is that unacceptable?
I'm sitting in an airport. That is all.
So what's everyone up to?
Whew. Apparently my phone is just trying to drive me nutso.
No, I swear she called. Maybe she just was just doing some phreaking or something, to trick my phone.
So, Christy, did you call me this morning at like 2:30? Cause, I swear you did. And I kind remember talking to you. But my phone has no record of receiving a call, so I'm kind freaked out. Did I dream that? I was kinda half asleep. Woah..
Johnny Z would be an excellent name for him though. He seems like a Johnny to me.
I have now mowed the lawn with much success. Grass better watch out, when I'm in town.
So, on your blog Christy, do you and Zach make snarky comments about me? Is there a whole secret world happening behind my back? Sigh.
So Christy, are you and Johnny Z hanging out tonight, or are you gonna come have french toast with me? Yeah, that's what I thought...
And you're addicted to crystal meth too. Which has seriously impacted your blogging productivity.
Yeah whatever, I'm used to rejection.
I'll explain it.
So, I rolled up to zachs pad in my lamborghini (being a rockman-lover). All of a sudden, gunshots rang out like a bell. It's a good thing I had my 9, which I grabbed, and all there was to be heard was shells (falling on the concrete real fast).
So, as we can see, if there is a problem, I'll solve it.
What's your version of events?
So Christy, when you start your hipster job, do you need a no-good-nik leech to suck your time and resources? Cause, I was thinking, I'd be good at that.
Why did your website just say "Please stand by" ?
Heh. I just wonder what the neighbors thought when they saw me get led out of the house and put in the back seat of the squad.
So I'm walking down selby, having gotten a delicious oreo blizzard from DQ. Couple kids come up behind me, tap me on the shoulder, ask if I've got some money. I said no, as I had quite literally spent my last $4 on said ice cream treat. They dropped back a bit, I kept walking. Then they came up again and said "Give us your wallet."
At this point, I started questioning whether this was a good situation to be in.
So, I quickly crossed the street, at which point they started running after me. I started running too, made it to Arden's house and got inside, they gave up at some point just before that. Then I called the cops.
Cop cars run a very ugly WindowsXp theme, and the back seats are rather uncomfortable. But they got me home, and all is well.
Right then, so I had to run away from guys trying to mug me tonight. Fucking hell. It was almost like being in your neighborhood Zach.
Wednesday night is probably good for me.
Also - I'm not sure when I'll be back on Monday, so maybe?
Heh, it was <60F in the studio today.
I chatted up Christy. It was fun!
I have a cute everything.
Sniff. Thanks for playing my song babe.
No, just want to know how long I have left to enjoy the warm glow of knowing you're in the same building.
So Christy, when do you start the corporate whore job?
No No, the one about fascism.
By the way - the very funny note on the candy machine in Rarig - that was me. aww yeah.
I was sort of standing behind Thomas, for fear of looking like I was trying to really be hip.
I was helping with the CD toss, you were at the other end of the hall. Unless you weren't in Rarig today, in which case it was some other hottie...
Christy! I just saw you, but you were all high-and-mighty.
I'm in Wisconsin for the weekend shooting for a DARPA project. I'll be back monday night - how's next week for everyone?
Woah, I pulled a Christie. My most sincere apologies Christy. I'll make it up to you with some fantastic toe sucking (or whatever's your bag)
So Z-dog and Christie-dog, when are we gonna chill?
I'd be hawt on MLC too!
Eat it Zach.
I dunno, is that where the gas chambers are?
Well you implied. And imply makes an IMP LY (lie). See!
And the MIA is a great place for a date too.
Also, a headline on the AP wire
"Slain Marines Tried to Root Out Insurgents"
It would have been much funnier if it read
"Slain Marines Tried to Root Out Insurgents, Succeeded."
You've never been to the MIA? The East Asian section is outstanding, especially some of the buddhist art. The park across the street is fun too, especially in the snow.
Frankly, if knowledge of 70s london punk doesn't getting the ladies, nothing will. Right?
Crass. Band from the UK (1977ish). Responsible for the genre of music known as, appropriately enough, crass music. Like, for example, rudimentary peni. Sort of punk derivative. They had a song that went "Big A Little A Bouncing B, The system might have got you but it won't get me ..."
So hence you said "and it's a little crass" and instead I provided "a little Crass."
Big A Little A Bouncing B
Now that's a little Crass.
By the way, thanks Christy!
Heh, so I should kill myself rather than chat up girls? Fantastic.
I'm hijacking this comment there. With the semester beginning shortly, I'd like to hear everyone's advice on chatting up girls! Have at it!
I was pretty fucking close. $1.58 off, that's close enough to win it all, right?
Hoo-boy... we need some fresh blog content, cause this shit is going downhill...
And all of you miserable muddy fuckheads... are alright...
If that's more than $74.33 then that is a very deceptive photo.
If you're going to make a comment bot, at least give it proper grammer. What has the world come to!
I suppose it would be too quick. Perhaps next week we'll be ready for cohabitation. For now we can stick to the sweet sweet lovin'
Wow, talk about excuses!
I have a couch! But I'm in St Paul, so I guess you wouldn't want to go slumming.
Sorry to hear about the gang violence. Whereabouts in minneapolis was this?
Nice to see you again too...
BLOG NOW BITCH
That's from like 1999 dude, get with the times. There was some question as to whether it was a legitimate site or not too.
The Laser LP players are very hip though.
That entertained me for a whole 7 seconds. What about the rest of the evening?
No Zach, sed is never the solution. Sed is a gateway command - next it'll be awk, and then down the slippery slope that ends up in "emacs can do everything!" world. Stop now, and return to nice friendly perl/php.
Also, the new NIN video for "Only" is complete crap. Your opinion?
Where's the rest of the audience? Folks? Hello? I can't just mock zach all the time.
Also, to all the ladies in the hizzouse, I have my new shoulder bag now, and I'm damn sexy. Just letting you know so you can get your groove ready for encountering me...
Probably cause of the pin thing...
Everest on Grand. A block down from Grand and Hamline.
Rawr. Now I'm just posting to have the FP. How sad...
Next time I see you, I will poke you with a pin to see if you're a robot...
I don't recall that second to last sentence happening. And in fact, it causes me to call into question your entire blog. Perhaps all these women are made up...
See, long, long ago, there was a musical genre called punk rock (not to be confused with capital p Punk of the emm-tee-vee [meet sue be she!]). And, in said genre, there were bands who were pretty cool long ago. In this instance, I was quoting a band called the dead kennedy's, a band that did indeed rock with punkitude. But then the rest of the band sued Jello and stole the music and released new cds with new mixes of all the songs and they all kind of sound like crap.
Speaking of punk, do all the folks here love Iggy Pop the proper amount? I often worry that he doesn't get the love he so rightly deserves...
Let's lynch the landlord
Let's lynch the landlord
Let's lynch the landlord man!
Zach, I want to get lunch. Why aren't you reachable?
I did buy you dinner though. And you didn't even put out.
Hey, I might cut loose and have ... a diet coke.
Trust me, I get crazy sometimes!
So Christy, you gonna come out with Zach and I tomorrow after work? We'll be all... professional-like. Hot, hu?
So what, you're hardass for the whole union now? Well maybe I'll go start enforcing law and order on the theater kids.
Where the hell are you? I want to go get ice cream, so you should drive over here. But no, you don't care about me. So fuck you. Fuck you Zach. I don't need your shit.
Please come back to me baby. I didn't mean it.
I'm out like Mary Cheney, later dudes!
Seriously zach, you can IM from work. I promise. Now get online and entertain me.
Sometimes I wonder how many people on this blog are really just Zach posting under other names. I'm not entirely sure that even I'm real. Just an observation.
I was attempting humor by referencing the unicorn shirt. Apparently I failed.
Yeah, I just don't get the whole "teh" thing. I mean, we're already spiraling towards being an illiterate culture, why do we need to speed things up with that kind of thing?
Now, that Unicorn shirt on the other hand...
In that case, it was just lame.
"Ian and Melissa were the lame the whole time. "
Were you trying to be "teh funnay" like somethingawful circa 1999, or did you just fuck up? -1 for grammar errors.
I dated a 30 year old and I was 21. Wasn't really an issue...
Yeah, that movie was a whos-who of typecast actors. Oh, and the other girl is apparently a fashion model who was addicted to heroin from 14 - 19. That's kind of nuts.
Zach - you can IM from this new job, right? That'd be sad otherwise...
So last night I watched "Slackers" cause, well, I was bored. Anyways, the guy who was in SLC Punk and Freaks and Geeks (not the one who was only in SLC punk, and not Pete from Pete and Pete) had the theory about talking down to the ladies to make them love you. But you know, I just don't think I can do that.
I should say that I am capable of being confident in real life. Only sometimes though...
Oops, I forgot to include obvious sexual undertones (I guess they're overtones if they're obvious?)!
"So, what I really need is someone to help me test out the loveseat" blah blah blah.. sexy blah blah poor colin sad and alone... booo hoooooo... whining on a deserted blog... time to put on some Promise Ring and cry myself into an Emo haze. Or play with my sexy sexy new lens... remember kids, consumer goods or love, but not both!
So I hit up ikea last week. Now I've got a dinner table, a bookshelf and a couch (more of a love seat I guess, smallish). Rock on. I'll have to hold a dinner party at some point, with deliciousness and sittingness. That's my fourth of July story.
Well, yeah, you pretty much are.
Ahhh, I see now. "All About My Mother" (Todo Sobre Mi Madre) - you can see how I'd get confused. That one is Petro Almodovar...
Heh. Woops. You might want to be careful about watching that with parents then. What the hell film was I thinking of?
Hey Christy - Just so you know, I have no qualms at all about dating undergrads.
That sure was an insanely long blog entry. All the things I had thought up to write at the beginning have since faded away.
I just told my excellent story about being abused at the Boynton Dental clinic. That was fun. On the other hand, one gets lots of free sympathy for saying "yeah, they accidentally ripped a filling out of my mouth."
So, in that blog entry, you made about 50 references to various "hot chix0rez!!!11!!eleven!!!" that you encountered throughout your travels. Be careful - when you decide to "go steady" with a girl you fancy, and she reads your blog, she'll think you're a manwhore.
I just googled for ookie cookie, and, according to Salon:
"My own college was no different, nor the hazing less terrifying. As at most schools, there was a rumor that trumped all others -- of a pledging endgame called "Ookie Cookie" in which fraternity hopefuls masturbated onto a cookie. The last one to finish faced a grueling ultimatum: eat the cookie or face instant excommunication."
And by FFII I mean FFIV of course, if you're a cool cool geek like the cool cool christy. Aww yeah..
FFII all the way. Cecil be my lovah. Ya...
Wild Guinnea pig? Hu?
Worst. Blog. Ever.
It was bound to happen. At least this way we can skip the awkward "mutual respect" phase...
Ok, I lied. Thursday is no good either. But friday...
I'm afraid I'm at the other job today. Hows about Friday (or 1ish thursday)?
What if the U took us both out? They don't seem to be reading all these reimbursement receipts I've been submitting..
No way, that's some scary shit. I'd be all "uhh, errr, mumble mumble..."
Hey Christy, seeing as you keep lurking round my hood, you should take me out for lunch sometime. I promise to be a good date.
Hmm.. that doesn't sound like the cicago trip I heard about...
Christy made it storm. That's pretty fucking cool.
"Because the hiring department has received a sufficient number of applicants for this position we have not forwarded your application."
Now that's some serious deep dicking.
Arden just got an urban outfitters couch and it was crap. Hrm.
Don't have a couch yet. You can help me find one though, then you can sleep on it..
I think I went a little far with this new air conditioned utopia. It's fucking freezing in here this morning.
And of course, you're both welcome to visit..
I hope that doesn't mean "new york" soon.
Boy, this air conditioning sure is nice...
Zach forgot about his blog :(
Well, maybe next saturday (after you help me move) we can get french toast.
Zach, where the hell are you. I want french toast. (And no, that's not code for anything, I want some damned french toast and I want someone to talk to while I eat it)
Maybe somebody stole your identities.
Was it startup.com? I've got the dvd if you want it...
They unfired me already. I'm back to being a high rolling pimp with love to spare..
Christy: we should. make out.
Bwahahaha. I = teh funnay.
So apparently I got fired by the U. Again. Basically every year around this time the computer fires me. And then they stop paying me for a month or two. Bastards.
When are we all gonna hang out?
Zach broke his lesbian... was bound to happen...
You effete asshole
I suppose now that Christy and I are lovers, you have very little to blog about... hence the lack of fucking updates, lamer.
Zach censored his fuckup. Ha!
Christy, are you looking for other men?
There we go.
And thusly, we kissed with tongues.
The makeout thing still stands of course.
Did anyone catch Fresh Air on NPR last night? Terry was interviewing this nutter who was explaining that evolution is responsible for facism, nazi-ism, communism, feminism, Kinsey, the Khmer Rogue, Mao, and a whole host of other things. And he wasn't saying "because of evolution, humanity evolved from apes and eventually came up with Lenin" but rather "because of Darwin, folks are evil and we should just teach Creation in schools."
(Hitler called himself a Christian too)
Not to make a mockery of your introspective blog, but I'd like to make a mockery of your introspective blog.
So I have a very attractive coworker at one of my jobs who is in to NIN, technology, linux and other cool stuff. Plus she's of non-eurocentric descent. You should come by some time and make her fall in love with you.
Sweet. health insurance would rock, hu?
I guess what I'm saying is that I'd like you to get drunk and make out with me.
While I don't drink, I'm happy for you to drink. In fact, I'd even encourage it!
He just don't love us anymore Christy. Maybe you and I should become a power couple - to crush his heart?
Speaking of DVDs and you fucknuts - I bought some DVDs from the UK, but forgot to change my default address in PayPal, so the DVDs went to 17th ave. Now some crazy hippies have them, or had them, and I have to break in and steal them. Either of you nutters still got a key?
If you guys lived near whole foods, you'd be so insanely in love... whole foods is sex.
Hmm. After my mom had part of her thyroid cut out (to see if she had thyroid cancer) she got this really kickass scar that looked like someone tried to cut her head off. Maybe you can have that too!
(she wore turtlenecks for a while)
Haikus are much more
than just syllables in rows
do you mock japan?
Anything I could possibly say right now would get either Zach or myself in trouble. And I'm just too nice.
Damnit, this relationship is lasting far too long. I miss AngstyZach(tm).
New NIN album is really really growing on me. Need to listen to it straight through to really enjoy it.
I wanted to go to the show, but I stayed home and slept instead.
Yeah, I have dreams about all kinds of sick things involving Zach, but those won't actually happen until I finish building the chamber. Wait, what?
This needs more explanation.
I tried that. Now I'm broke. It's your turn.
Zach, you should get a real job, or else gets loads of monaaay to start a business. This I have decreed.
Hrm, that's no good Zach. At least you've got lots of practice with needles... Sorry though!
Yeah, I mean, you might have to just spend every night in her apartment instead of going out and spending money on her. What a pain in the ass that would be.
Solve two problems - start smoking beggars!
Sniff, I miss Zach. Luckily, given his track record, he'll be back to emo-blogging soon..
Entertain me more.
Wanna go to the May Day parade this year? May 1st.
Sniff, no updates anymore..
No no, see I was implying that you had sent me naughty pictures of Di. And see, that way, when she finds her blog, she'll break up with you and I'll get to laugh. Ha ha ha ha ha...
Those pictures you sent were hot. Thank's Zach, and thanks Di too!
Christy, all your references to the use of psychotropic substances... I'm worried that you may be... you know... a hippie..
Personally, I think yall suck.
I guess I can't come since i'm neither a girl or bringing a girl. Ian has a girlfriend? He's not just stalking a neighbor again is he?
Sweet. I've got some dog thyroid medication I can give you. Apparently dogs have like 10x the thyroid hormone levels that humans do, so I guess one of these pills would make you explode..
Hyper or Hypo? Thyroid seems like a bitch of an organ.
Is your thyroid broken?
Is that picture from New york?
So, apparently you slept with 8 - 10 girls in the span of 15 minutes last night? Very impressive my young apprentice...
Damnit zach, I need to hang out with you more. you get all the ladies...
P.S. - Come to Vegas with me next week! $229!
I was going to, but I was worried it would rain.
Zach where are you? I want to go to dinner tonight.
Psst Zach, did you kill Christy? where is that girl...
Seeing those pics reminded me of the Ford silica mines. Getting into there would be fun... I know where they are...
It does get darker when you press it down you know? But I applaud you for being one of the few who doesn't drink wuss coffee.
The mastering sounded weird to me too. Perhaps it was mixed for radio play though. Shrug.
Picked up the TDS dvd-audio set the other day. Don't have a real 5.1 setup to test with, but it is good to revisit an old friend. Plus, replacing my ancient TDS mp3s (probably one of the first cds I ever ripped) with nice clean AACs is an added bonus (my original TDS disc is pretty scratched after many a high school bus trip with Heresy blasting in my headphones).
Sometimes you're 2bit. A 2-bit whore that is.
Zach doesn't know what he's talking about in relation to nine inch nails. Let it be known.
Though part of the linked entry could have resulted in sore butts, had the KY not been discovered.
Oh, and have a good day.
Zach. Right now congress is try to figure out a way to keep a braindead woman from being allowed to pass away according to her wishes because of the Value Of Life(tm), while simultaneously choosing to ignore death and abuse caused by the US government throughout the world. We won't give health care to children, but we'll spend millions to keep a dead woman from looking dead.
The truth is, we're fucked and you know it.
Maybe they were just filled with different amounts? Empty one of each into measuring cups.
Oh come now, what about "deep" - he's done this stuff before. I'm sure it'll all turn out OK. Right?
Yeah.. that's me. Didn't I tell you I took a new job?
Heh, I hear Zach is going to have an... exciting.. day at work.
Sniff. I want to hang out with you fun kids. My life isn't nearly so exciting...
Plus, now you can say dirty things about them. Go go!
Hoorah! So, gas will be back to $1/gallon tomorrow right? That's my understanding...
Zach - what you up to wednesday nizzyight? We should hang out. I need to hear about your new and exciting life!
You should write your note, then pin it to your boss's eyeball...
Did you really give your two week notice?
You don't really communicate useful things over AIM anyways. Usually it's just "Heh." or "Idle"
Heh... backorifice rocked. That is all.
I think I finally managed to offend your other readers...
I like my women like I like my scotch - aged 12 years and into coke.
La-de-da-da-da. Didn't the study note some other conditions regarding the results?
You both better feel me.
Call in sick.
That's my boy! What you up to tonight?
Luckily I don't ever want a gig doing web development...
I on the other hand, obfuscate all my HTML generation inside undocumented PHP functions that are brought in from outside includes. Job preservation.
And by "IE, Mozilla, Opera and Lynx" you mean "Safari" ... right?
I hear Hilter was in to standards...
It must be tough being an HTML snob in that environment. Now start yelling about CSS that doesn't conform with the WC3 spec! CSS bitching is the most exciting kind of bitching you know?
Yeah! We're underemployed college graduates!
I know I'd like to integrate your discrete eigenvalue matrix, if you know what I mean..
I owned you last night. In bed.
2005 Mini Cooper S Works Edition.
And you found Christy in your pants I hear...
Where is Christy anyways? Are you here sweetie?
So I went to get my Mini today, and they said "Woops, we actually don't have it ready, we called you by accident" ... woo. So instead they me an ever nicer car as a loaner...
But the dead insects are the best bit! That's half the reason for going to Noodles & Company right there...
(note: above comment not meant to do harm to the fine folks at the Noodles & Company corporation)
That blog finished faster than... a really fast thing. So what happened? Did you get your car back? Was it all busted up? Broken bones and nasty cuts?
You laugh kind of funny.
She was weird...
When Zach was off whoring around europe, we ran a meth lab in his bedroom.
What were you, 12 in 1997?
If you kill them all, can I have some of their stuff?
Hmm.. anything to get in her pants I suppose, eh Zach?
Poe Poe Poe...
Zachy boy, did you buy TDS deluxe edition yet?
I'd like to get in on something else, if you know what I mean...
Like little joey?
Fixed is tits all together.
Now, who has the multidisc version of halo7 and who has the single disc more tracked australian import?
But what about the other halos? Sure, Piggy from TDS is good, about what about Piggy (Track one) from FDTS. That's even better!
cat /dev/random > mynewalbum.wav
ha ha ha.
Music fests are lame. You'd get all smelly. Plus you don't have a tent.
His slave girl's taco stand.
Insert something sexual regarding the word growth. I'm such a child.
Doesn't your mom read this blog?
By the way, the quantity and quality of your blog entries has declined lately. Are they going to get better?
Oh whatever, I know how those two are...
Yeah, but I hear that MPR is just a liberal pornography and propaganda venue anyways
Hrm, I loaded naughty pictures at work as well. You need a NSFW tag!
Ooo... I turn her off when she's on the radio... course, i turn most women off..
Apparently you're too cool to update your blog anymore...
Ok, now leave a letter on his desk that you say was courier delivered, telling them that as part of an out of court settlement, he's entitled to a $25 payment due to the mistreatment of his package. All he needs to do is call to provide some tax information.
Do it! do it!
Hrm. Now send a letter saying that they shipped him somebody elses monitor and they need him to ship it back (at his expense)
That's a very nice prank. I'd like to see a picture of his face when it comes. Just censor the face part too.
Anyone want to buy my car? It'd be a good Jetta replacement!
But you're cuter than me, so it all balances out.
Is wanderlust the thing that makes you kill prostitutes? In that case, I've got wanderlust too...
He should have had a coupon organizer organizer. Hah!
I'm less dead now. My ears are still bleeding though. Want to go to the RockRockRock tonight for a show?
That's.... scary. I bet she kept her children in little pouches too. Chopped up of course.
By the way, newyork.xopl.com...
Pssst, Zach. Somebody (^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^) is giving you horns!
Is it old? Maybe you should steal it.
Heh. It's just a like a real career, except you work more, get paid less, and don't have benefits! We sure are making use of these fine college degrees...
IS this girl attractive? You already have enough aggressive hoes, but maybe you should add an insecure girl to your pocket-full of ladies...
Ooo, is your documentary going to be about your hoes?
How about doing one about how much "The Current" sucks rocks. How many Replacements and Low songs can we cram into a 6 hour block?
Blogging about dreams again...
I'm still sick.
You should move. Does Christy have a nice place?
Zach does not live in a flat. Euro-trash girl.
All in all this sounds like a good evening. I rented 8 dvds, all of which are one-night rentals. The movie rental guy looked at me awful funny. Apparently he doesn't have a mac...
Oh, and there was a work-party. It was very stiff. The work parties when the coworkers are like 40-50 are very different from the ones where the coworkers are 18-24. Who woulda thunk.
By the way, Christy love, I think you should get your own blog. That way we can compare and contrast your account of your time with zach against his own ever so insightful entries.
Make zach buy you a domain if you don't already have one. And if he says he can't host it, tell him that real men have their own servers...
blah bla laj l;alkjwe;lkjra;z., z
z;lijzx. oiqaoiwaiooasoskzxlkxlzk smash smash smash klajsdf;lajfeoawfe;oasjif smash l;akjsdfl;asdjkf;elajfweiotuaweoitgvxz,mc nb,mxcv,mxc sratret Here you'll find the random babbling of a "mill city" Minneapolis, MN resident who insists it might be cold enough here to flash freeze a goose on Christmas, but 2 million people do live here, and only some of us have bad accents-- dontchya know.fdafdasf af dafwef Here you'll find the random babbling of a "mill city" Minneapolis, MN resident who insists it might be cold enough here to flash freeze a goose on Christmas, but 2 million people do live here, and only some of us have bad accents-- dontchya know.fdaf daear
Actually, seeing as Reuters is a major news source, I think having the article there counts as it being "in the news." Perhaps you meant "On the news"?
Colin = grumpy this morning..
So your pimp doesn't like it if you miss those prime after-dinner hours?
I'm sorry pamela, I still love you.
Man, your mom is going to have a bad opinion of me. Sorry Mrs Xopl! I'm only offensive in the blogosphere, not real life..
I'm starting to wonder if it's actually possible to be at a job on time. The best I can do is about 15 minutes late, and that's rare. How do the suit-and-tie crowd do it?
What else! C'mon, I want shenanigans!
And giving you that diease. What a bitch.
Yeah, that damn tramp. She was so much less cool than Christy! And her claiming the kid was yours, that's crazy. I mean, mostly.
Keep sucking that non-profit teet. It's the only way to live.
Ooo, now that's high quality funny.
You == lush.
No No, I meant Monday.
Talk normal you damn hippie. And where is everyone else lately? Everyone else should be here to tease you as well. After all, that's why you started this blog right? Or are we supposed to be stroking your ego? I always forget...
If you get fired, you won't be able to buy her pretty things!
Now you're posting internal company email on the web. You're just trying to get fired eh?
Working something at least...
Jeez, it's only been like 24 hours and already Zach won't talk to me...
What the devil?
I still want mongolian too. You can bring the girl if that's what it takes..
Well see, they usually have two sensors using two techniques, so that there is redundancy. The "you're out of fuel" light is usually a separate measuring device. There are a number of techniques - floats are definitely the most common, but nowadays there are some more essoteric solutions as well.
Stay away from my man Christy. He my baby daddy.
I'm saving myself for Zach.
Pamela is hot though.
Don't worry, I'm sure they'll never figure out that Xopl is actually *coughcoughcough*, an employee of *hackcoughhack*.
Mongolian on wednesday then?
Well, cause you don't work the same days as me mostly. Wanna do mongolian on tuesday night?
Zach, you gotta go do some shenanigans to result in more exciting blogs. Go steal a police car or something.
I think it's pronounced "Bush." Hrm. No wait, that was weak.
I want mongolian barbeque.
They do own one. It charges by the hour though. And it's a bit smelly.
Girls are never nice. She was probably a transvestite.
Oh c'mon, give it up. You're there for life at this point.
Ohh, sheee must be the one you were telling me about. Sweet.
More new blogs!
Plus, ok, so the guy built a complex lens rig just to set fire to houses. But, ok, why did he burn the other houses down if he wanted the money? I mean, ok, I understand if this is part of a bigger series, and you're setting that up as the plot for the future movies, but then you should indicate that.
But it was pretty.
B is for blog you lazy ass.
I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you.
It's because you made god angry by sleeping with that chick
Hooboy... blogging about dreams now zach. I'm starting to worry about you. Happy new year!
Man, searching for fucking on google with safesearch off is some scary shit.
By the way, the title on this blog entry was terrific.
Dude, you're getting a carebear.
"After Hurricane Mitch in 1998, when about 9,000 people were killed and 3 million were left homeless in Central America, the United States provided $988 million in relief assistance."
hmm. We just need a way to turn gravity into electricity, and then beam the energy off-world, thus lowering the planet's ability to spin (me right round baby right round)
Hey everyone, let's guess what's still at 85%. Is it... the humidity? No...
Is it... the percent of the population that still likes dubya? No...
Oh I know, it's your damn new york page. Less emo, more html(o).
Also: bring me a dr pepper. I'm at the studio. That is all.
Oh man, blog entries that refer to themselves like this are way WAY down the path to emo. Snap out of it Zach! Tell us about the ladies and the parties and the fast fast fast life you live there in the twin cities.
But don't we all know them, just a little?
Oooo, I want to "borrow" the peewee's playhouse dvds. Borrow with my burner that is...
And by the way: making jokes about something that killed 50,000 people - awesome! Maybe Chris Jensen was there.
Colin = sexyyyy
La la la la la, zach doesn't love us, la la la la la la.
So Zach, I got my membership card for the historical society. We got to rock some of these places soon.
I hadn't noticed that you'd decorated the site zach. excellent work.
Oooo, a journal. That's like == sex in the language of the indie kid.
Wisconsin isn't that cool zach - stay in the shitties for christmas. Or have a good christmas or something.
I am in need of cheap dates.
Hey Zach - is pamelaneko that girl you were telling me the stuff about?
You didn't make *me* any cookies. Bitch.
I'll nuke you infinity plus one time. Ha! Merry Christmas Zach!
One time me and zach were doing lines and then this dude showed up and he was like "oh shit man!" and we were like "shit!" but then it all turned out cool so no problem.
Cub coworker or MPR coworker?
I dunno, I bet I've seen better pictures. Like that one of Zach in pasties and a G-string...
That had like seven million w's in it. You lose! You're banned.
You, sir, have a limited grasp of the english language.
Me and my pencil needed to look at some movies. I told my pencil that the best thing about him had to be his sleek and sexy body. He replied that he thought the same thing about me. To celebrate this agreement, the pair of us travelled to the video store to rent some hot hot man on pencil action. At the store though, the clerk told us that no such tapes existed. Because of this, I used the pencil to stab the clerk in the eye. And then I cried.
Do you have an RSS feed?
I demand more blog entries!
Z-dog, you're kind of scaring me with this multiple personality shit.
I guess I'm just an idiot.
Sorry, I was under the impression it was a new feature. Or, are you doing server side include php or something? That would be hip.
Oooo, pagination, you're so sexy with your php. And now you statically generate your pages too? Worried about the slashdotting?
I feel a need to comment, but that was so dry that I was left thinking of the turkey from thanksgiving of '89.
Oh man, that was some high quality emo.
Here's the crux of your problem - you still care. Just resign yourself to crass commercialism (and Crass the band!) and get on with it. Get a dog too. They help quite a bit.
Maybe you should just write about it on your blog instead of actually taking the job. Take the job! MPR would rock! You don't have to stay forever, and once you're in you can get a new position. Better than facing groceries at least, right?
I do, but since according to your picture, it's fundamentally impossible to ever eat any...
DAmnit Zach, they're going to have you killed now.
I think you have a gambling problem. Wanna go to vegas in April?
Oh wait. Now I get it. What happened to my post asking if your website was archived in the archive.org wayback machine? Maybe I forgot to submit it.
I don't get it.
Sorry about the job G.
Just for future reference, for portfolio use you're allowed to use any project you've worked on, whether you hold copyright or not. For example, for my demo reel, I'm free to use anything that has my name attached.
You're not me-pretty though
I just noticed that the title on your website ("The domain of Xopl") is dumb. Change it.
In regards to the new years eve sexing, I hear rumor of hot hot goings on down at Joey's house. He and Luke are throwing a big bash!
Wait no, that's all bullshit.
$19.50 for your soul.
Sounds like the perfect combination of slacker liberal work and a real job - go zach! Perhaps I should apply...
I question whether user number 74 is a real person. Sounds more like some dirty hippy to me.
Blow and hookers! For me at least. The g5 is nice too...
Hmm, methinks your blog readership isn't interested in this question. I was going to answer in a much more daring manner, but I worried about offending your mom..
Update More Frequently!
Hmm. They don't have a Goat flavor do they? Peach then...
I'm inside your head man..
Today I hurt. I hurt so bad. The world came crumbling and tumbling down around me, just like it does every day. Why is there no love? Was there ever love? Was it really all you needed? Am I really doomed to be sad like this? Maybe I should get a grilled cheese at the dinkytowner instead of crying myself to sleep tonight.
I dunno, those DNR folks are a bit too close to environmentalists. And hey, wisconsin stopped paying to pick up all the dead deer on the side of the road...
Anyways, this blog doesn't have enough emo. I shall demonstrate a proper post below.
That's just what they want you to think! Don't give in!
Wait, wisconsin still has a DNR? I thought they got replaced by a guy named Earl and his pickup truck. Need that extra three cent state income tax cut after all...
Personally I just get paid for sex. That might work for you too Zach...
Yay! Zach is Back! Lets go out for dinner tonight.
Zach needs to blog more..
If you really loved me you'd quit your job to keep me happy.
I remember when Zach went to movies with me. Then he got all "too cool for you" on me...